Health & Fitness
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Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Lack of Motivation & now the hubby is noticing
I have a serious lack of motivation, which I am really frustrated with. I want to lose weight badly, and I know exactly what to do, but I can never seem to stick to the plan or follow through. My husband and I got into an argument and he brought up my motivation and now my goals seem extra daunting because I want it for me and now to prove him wrong too. HELP?!?!?
Re: Lack of Motivation & now the hubby is noticing
Well first off - your husband sounds like an a$$hole. Maybe he is concerned about your weight and wants you to be healthy, but it doesn't sound like he went about it the right way.
There isn't a secret motivation fairy that will come down and whip you into shape. You have to make up your mind that you ar going to workout and eat right. As nike says.... Just do it.
Doing something to try to prove your spouse wrong is a really bad dynamic in a marriage.
You need to do this because YOU want to make a change. It won't stick any other way. Nobody can want it for you.
When I feel my motivation is lacking, I try to look at smaller goals and accomplishments - feeling far away from your 'big' goals can be daunting.
Start with things like 'I'm going to run/exercise/go to the gym/whatever X times this week.' 'I'm going to lose 10 lbs'. (then I'm going to lose the next 10). It's easier to manage the motivation when you feel like you're making progress somewhere. I also find it easier to get out there and do something when I'm attending a class or group ride - it's on my calendar like a meeting, so I'm going to go.
What are your goals? I mean...what exactly are you trying to motivate yourself to do? Get to the gym X times a week? Prepare healthy food at home? Counting calories or otherwise tracking your food/activity? It helps to have concrete steps in place.
Also, I agree with PP, your husband sounds like kind of a jerk. Obviously we don't know the context of the argument but if my husband commented on my weight under those circumstances, I'd tell him to shove it up his @ss. You need to do this for yourself, but obviously it helps when your partner is supportive rather than snarky about it...is he on board with both of you living an active, healthy lifestyle and eating wholesome food?
Last Race: California International Marathon - December 4, 2011 - 3:29:18, 7:59 pace
Next Race: ARun for Young 5K - January 7, 2012
I agree w/a PP that said to create small goals. Sometimes, if you look at the big picture and how much you want to lose entirely, it will seem overwhelmingly impossible. Try and stick with smaller goals in 5-7lb incriments.
Track what your eating with a healthy eating website such as WW or, Sparkpeople.com which is free. Accountability will help put things into perspective. Just give yourself small, weekly goals after you evaluate what you're eating. Maybe start by saying to yourself that you will take the stairs as opposed to the elevator, skip one dessert/craving a week, eat smaller portions, add more veggies to your plate, etc.
Next, exercise - find an activity that is tolerable. Walk outside for 30 min, play with your dog in the yard, clean your house while blasting music, go shopping with a friend for a few hours (hey, that can be good cardio!
), bikeride, lift weights, committ to an exercise class, etc.
What works best for me when I have no desire/motivation/will to eat right and/or workout....I just think of how I will feel AFTER I consume that donut, cookie, etc. Not only will I have guilt, BUT, I will feel sluggish and gross. Eating better = feeling better...just keep telling yourself that. Before the weight loss, you have to focus on the feeling.
GL!
PR's
5k 10/15/11 30:34 9:51 pace
8k 9/24/11 55:20 11:08 pace
10k 11/24/11 11:24 pace
10 mile 4/25/10 2:03:54
Thank you for writing! I have never done this thing before, and I couldnt really believe people wrote! I know you are right, I need to just do it! My biggest fear is being lazy, and I think I have already fallen into that trap, so I need to fix that about myself. Being lazy is easy, and I need to work hard. Losing weight is really what I want most. So I need to focus on it and do it. I am a great planner, and I have read every book there is too read about weight loss. GOL - I am rereading this and its like "Hey! Just DO IT ALREADY!! LOL
I will work on this - although I do wish there was a magic motivation fairy, its not my husband! (which I have tried to make him)
Your Right!! I know!!! It breaks my heart that I have let myself down and him too, so that makes things a little overwhelming. I thought telling myself "I can show him," would help, but that makes it even more stressful.
This will be for me.
Hi! Thank you for writing, I have never done this before, I am surprised to have people care! Smaller goals will be something I work on. We got engages about a year ago and I told myself I would lose these 30 pounds and get back to the weight I was when we met by our wedding. (we already are married, but we are going to have the big party in June) So, June 15th is the day, and it is about two months away, and I am more frustrated than ever, because I have let yet another year go by with out results. Losing weight is all I think about, and all I ready about, and I do really good with exercise and diet for a few weeks at a time and then stop and then start and then stop and so on and so forth. It would be nice to get over this hump and not let my own self get in my way anymore. Anyway, maybe just feeling better in my clothes by the wedding will be good. No bikini on the honeymoon which is a let down to myself, but at least I can still accomplish something! Right?!
Hi! Thank you for writing! I think my husband's main thing is that he wants me to succeed with a goal instead of always letting myself down. It is a bad cycle really, I feel bad that he has to watch it, I would tell him to get over it! LOL
I have a habit of making a good plan, sticking to it for three days and then stopping. He just wants me to follow through. And I want to too!
Like everyone else said, it is a matter of just doing it!!!!!!!!!!