Trouble in Paradise
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Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
My husband is moving out :(
He's not happy. I'm not happy. I want kids, he doesn't. Just needed to tell some random people I'll never meet. Anyone else divorced young (28 yrs old)?
Re: My husband is moving out :(
I'm sure you are doing the right thing. Congrats for doing what you need to do to get to where you want to be.
There are a few TIPers who went through a divorce at a young age. I'm sure they'll introduce themselves.
Thanks. I know it's the right thing (although the right thing would have been not to get married in the first place but I digress).
Is it weird that I feel a huge sense of relief?
I left my XH a few years ago at 30, after 13 years together. Huge sense of relief, and I have not looked back since.
You may go through a whole range of emotions in the coming weeks and months, but it sounds like you are doing whats right for both of you. Good luck.
I divorced at age 30 after 10 years with my XH. It was a long, confusing, emotional road, but I think I'm ultimately better for it.
I think it speaks well of you that you recognized an absolute incompatibility before you wasted a lot of years and frustration. Circumstances often change as time marches on. Hopefully you'll be able to split amicably and get on with your lives.
Thanks. This was a long time coming but the first time we've both wanted it. He's looking for a place, I'll keep the house, he gets the car that's paid off (he makes less than I do), don't have an CC debt.
I'm not sure what the rules are but I asked him to watch the dog in a few weeks while I'm out of town. I don't have a problem with him staying at our/my place but I'm wondering if this is a bad idea...
I haven't been divorced, but I want to throw in some more support for you. It takes a very strong, self aware person to identify these issues as early as you have. You sound like you really do know that this is the best thing for both of you and that's great. Good luck with a quick and amicable divorce and a happier future for both of you.
You may want to post on Starting Over as well. I feel "old" over there a lot of times and I am only 36. I am sure there are a number of girls there who divorced at your age.
And relief is a good emotion to feel. It means you know you are making the right choice. Hang in there.
My divorce will be final about 3 weeks before I turn 28.
It is good to end things when you realize it won't work instead of trying to stick it out and failing later on. Good luck and remember, you are not alone in this
It is. He has a daughter so I don't think it's as big a deal for him. This isn't our only issue but it's indicative of the totally different lifestyles we both want. I want kids, financial stability, and normal picket fence. He doesn't want kids, couldn't care less about being financially responsible, and just plain doesn't want to be married. Neither is right or wrong but just too different.
You did the right thing, and will be all the stronger for it (sounds like you know this already
). Married at 22, divorced at 24 here. More than 5 years together total.
Stick around! As you can see, there are a lot of us who had to go over the same decisions and emotional turmoil as you. The support here was invaluable for me.
I never remember that you were married. Idk why.
Lurker here.
I'm sorry you are dealing with this right now, but it will get better. You will go through a wide range of emotions, but in the end, it will be what is best since y'all are on opposite ends of ideas. I married at 22, had a kid at 23, left when I was 25, divorce went through when I was 26. I'm about to be 28. I'm in a far better place then I could have been.
You're doing the right thing. Children really aren't something you can compromise on. It is an entire change of lifestyle, and if one partner is unwilling, it can be devastating. On the other side, a person who doesn't want children might be absolutely resentful, even if you convince them to have a child.
Good luck with your new future, and new life! It is great that you are moving on now, and have so many new opportunities ahead of you
I frequently forget it too, Motz!