Relationships
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Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Love my in-laws... I think?
My mother, father and sister in law, I have no problem with. But the rest of his family drives me crazy! The adults at least. His aunt is racist and just mean. I refuse to talk to her. They judge me at every turn. I have been with my husband for a little over a year and the first time I did something for myself (starting college), they jumped down my throat! They think he is a saint! He is the one who almost lost me because of treating me like crap and I got blamed for not being a good wife. My husband deploys in September and I decided to stay near base so I can go to school for free and get a job easier, but apparently I am supposed to move in with his family. I have my own family in a different state! The sad thing is I know that if me and him ended up splitting, ever, I would be the one to blame. I just had to vent! Ugh!
Re: Love my in-laws... I think?
Unfortunately, us being the ones that take their "baby" away is more common with the guy's side of the family. I'm not saying everybody, but it seems more common to me. I know some dads of girls are like that too if the girl is Daddy's Little Princess, but in my family, I've seen that the guy's family is like that.
My dad's mom was like that with my mom. She remained friends with my dad's ex wife (even though no children were involved) and never stopped comparing my mom to his ex wife, regardless of how much my dad stood up to his mom. And trust me, he did.
My FI's mom called me his ex's name the other day and my FI went ape shiit. I don't think it was intentionally, but why is she even thinking about his ex when I'm sitting right there? It upset me a lot, but at least FI stood up for me and told her that it was effed up.
I hope things get better for you because having non-supportive in-laws (well the rest of the bunch) sucks. Just be happy that you get along with MIL, FIL, and SIL, that's a feat in itself.
Why do they even know you're visiting your family? Or that a friend commented on your facebook status?
And really, if your husband has done so much to hurt you, then why are you still with him?
One of my husband's cousins, who is our age so I thought would be cool, reported to his grandpa that we had gay pride stuff "all over our pages."
I really don't know what she was talking about but it led to a big fight, and they took us out of the will. Which really hurt us because we were really excited about the sixth of a plot of land in rural MS we would get someday.
Anyway, we learned to lock down our FB pages when it came to his family. We will friend them, but they are automatically blocked from everything. So things only get shared if we decide to share with them. People will treat you how you allow them to. Share only what needs to be shared. Don't discuss things with them if it's not their business. Decide where your boundaries are and stick to them.
It also helps if your husband isn't an ass.
we all fall down sometimes
brass and ballet flats
You guys seem to have a lot of issues for only being married (not quite) a year. If you're already considering what happens if you split up, I think that's a pretty clear indication that you've got some work to do if you want to make things work.
Is he deployed now?
"If you wanna win then you shoulda put a hat on it. Don't be mad when you see a knit cap won it. If you wanna win then you shoulda put a hat on it."- Fenton
I want to tell him but there is really no other place that we could choose that would t make him resent me