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Strip Club vs Porn Clicky poll

Another nestie and I were emailing yesterday RE: my "strip club" comment in a previous thread and it got me thinking...

 

[Poll]
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They see us rollin'...they be hatin'.

Re: Strip Club vs Porn Clicky poll

  • I guess it all depends on the context.

    Porn can be great. If porn is chosen over hooking up with me = not cool.

    I think I would not be okay with a man who was only into like scat porn.

    Strip clubs. In theory I dont have a problem with them. They can be kinda fun. How often would he be going? With whom? How much $ is he spending? IDK.

     

    f.k.a.= Derniermot
  • Was it an interesting previous thread, or not so much?
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  • imagePremierMot:

    Strip clubs. In theory I dont have a problem with them. They can be kinda fun. How often would he be going? With whom? How much $ is he spending? IDK.

     

    The BF and I have been to strip clubs several times. While I wouldn't mind if he went with his buds (without me) occasionally, I wouldn't be comfortable if he made a habit of it.  & I am not sure if this is hypocritical, but I would think it was weird if he went by himself (while we were together).

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    They see us rollin'...they be hatin'.
  • I do not like strip clubs. Period. I used to be less uptight about it, but after all the crap I have been through I honestly just do not like it. I can handle a bachelor party, maybe... but beyond that I just do not like it.

    Porn... that is a sensitive topic for me too. I know most guys look at it, so my philosophy is as long as it is legal, on his own time and I never catch him, I wont get upset. ETA: To clarify "upset" I don't mean I would necessarily get "mad"... but I would be uncomfortable with it and let him know.

    Like I said I used to not care much at all, but now I really prefer to keep my distance from that stuff.

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  • imageReturnOfKuus:
    Was it an interesting previous thread, or not so much?

     

    http://community.thenest.com/cs/ks/forums/thread/65192769.aspx

     

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    They see us rollin'...they be hatin'.
  • I don't mind either of those, in moderation.  As PP said, if the porn is taking the place of me, it's a problem.  If he's blowing ridiculous amounts of $$$ in the clubs, it's a problem.  Otherwise, NBD.
  • imageUDscoobychick:
    I don't mind either of those, in moderation.  As PP said, if the porn is taking the place of me, it's a problem.  If he's blowing ridiculous amounts of $$$ in the clubs, it's a problem.  Otherwise, NBD.

    I agree with this but want to add that if I had no idea it was happening, there would be big issues!

  • I have ethical issues with all of the above.
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  • It would take a lot for me to get to a point of trust where I was ok with either, particularly the strip club.  Porn could be ok if it wasn't like he was choosing it over our sexx life. 

    Strip clubs and bachelor party situations, I've never understood.  It seems like there are always lines that are crossed, and what is the point?  Someone is supposed to be getting married but they feel the need to have one last hurrah checking out/fondling/etc with someone who isn't their FI?  While all of their buddies (who are probably married themselves or in relationships) cheer them on?  It seems wrong, IMO.  Also, a friend of mine had a roommate who was a stripper who worked bachelor parties.  She filled us in on what actually went on.  Call me naive but I was absolutely astounded and appalled.  It's nothing I'd want my SO/FI/DH around.

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  • I'm 100% cool with porn, but the idea of strip clubs gives me a nervous pit in my stomach.  It's irrational, but I can't help it!

    So we beat on, boats against the current, borne back ceaselessly into the past.

  • imageGhostofZeldaFitzgerald:
    I'm 100% cool with porn, but the idea of strip clubs gives me a nervous pit in my stomach.  It's irrational, but I can't help it!

    I'm in the same boat as you!

  • imageGhostofZeldaFitzgerald:
    I'm 100% cool with porn, but the idea of strip clubs gives me a nervous pit in my stomach.  It's irrational, but I can't help it!

     

    I do not think this word means what you think it means.

     

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  • I'm ok with porn as long as it isn't of the kid variety or violent variety.

    Strip clubs in CA where alcohol is served, I am ok with. There is a look but no touch policy and the girls have to wear a g-string. Plus if you knew my bf and how shy he is where anything sex-related is concerned, you'd know why I don't worry.

    Strippers in a hotel room for a bachelor party, not so much.

  • I'd never be ok with a SO going to a strip club.  I've worked in them before and I know what goes on there.
  • I said I don't mind either, however, I'm saying that meaning I don't mind either as long as it's not excessive.  If the guy I was dating was glued to his computer all day long looking at porn, I wouldn't be okay with that.  If he went to a strip club every Friday night, I wouldn't be okay with that.  Everything in moderation applies to all facets of life.
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  • image+Black Kitty+:
    I'd never be ok with a SO going to a strip club.  I've worked in them before and I know what goes on there.

    I think you should dish it out. Fill in the rest of us who are clueless!

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  • imagePrettyInPearls23:

    image+Black Kitty+:
    I'd never be ok with a SO going to a strip club.  I've worked in them before and I know what goes on there.

    I think you should dish it out. Fill in the rest of us who are clueless!

    This please!

    And in response to the OP, I have issues with both, mostly as a result of my relationship with my exH. I'm honestly not sure if I would be okay with it in my current relationship, but probably not, thanks to all of the wonderful insecurities that my exH left me with.

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  • Porn I don't have a problem with as long as it's 1) not excessive 2) not being used in place of our sexlife and 3) isn't something that SO would go out of his way to hide from me.
     
    Strip clubs are another story. I think they are disgusting and tacky and I 100% judge men who go to places like that. I'm slightly less judgmental if it's for a bachelor party, but that's only because too many men think that it's the "norm" to celebrate like that. Whatever. I think it's gross and I don't like it. That being said, I won't tell FI he can't go to one. I'll share my feelings on those kinds of establishments and let him make the decision himself. The choice is his.
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  • imagePrettyInPearls23:

    image+Black Kitty+:
    I'd never be ok with a SO going to a strip club.  I've worked in them before and I know what goes on there.

    I think you should dish it out. Fill in the rest of us who are clueless!

    I third this.

    I can fill everyone in a little about what my friend's stripper roomie said about the bachelor party strippers (and btw, XH did have a bachelor party WITH strippers from the same city this girl was from).

    She said they'd do "party favors".  So for like $10 they would put a dollar bill on the guys' forehead and *ahem* pick it up with their private parts (after they'd lick their hand and the "down there" to make sure they could actually get the $ bill to adhere to where they needed it too).  This is why money is so dirty people.

    Another incident was where they would do a cartwheel (naked of course) and land strategically in a position near the groom's face (think the letter "Y"). 

    I heard of another bachelor party where whip cream was eaten out of a stripper's assscrack and the men took turns sucking on her breasts.

    I've also heard of men (including grooms) getting suucked off by the strippers or how they will essentially do ANYTHING for the right amount of money.

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  • Oh, and I almost forgot about the lollipop trick.  They would "hide the lolly" and then let men take turns licking it.  Yah.....
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  • imageachase123:
    Oh, and I almost forgot about the lollipop trick.  They would "hide the lolly" and then let men take turns licking it.  Yah.....

    I've heard of this being called "Lick the Kitty." And yeah, gross.

    That's why I am of the mindset in a club in CA where alcohol is served so they can't be totally nude or touch and it is reputable so there are lots of bouncers = ok. Anything else = not ok.

    BF has only been 3 or so times in his life for bachelor parties. And the one he went to while we were together was in San Francisco and I know about it from when I lived up there. I wasn't worried about that one.

  • image+Black Kitty+:
    I'd never be ok with a SO going to a strip club.  I've worked in them before and I know what goes on there.

    This is why I'm not ok with strip clubs.  You know, doing lines of some girl's asss doesn't sit so well with me.   

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  • I wouldn't care if a SO was looking at porn (what guy doesn't??). Unless he was spending quite a bit of money on it, especially since you can find a lot of free porn online.  As for strip clubs, I've been in one with guys (I was the only girl in the group) and some of them didn't like it at all, other guys, yeah, I wouldn't want to be dating them. 

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