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Desperate to fall pregnant... :(
Hi all,
I am writing to you for some advice as I am now becoming increasingly emotional regarding our desperation to get pregnant. My husband and I began trying around October 2011, after our wedding. I tracked my fertile days, and tried on those days. Missionary, legs up, all the tips.
Both my husband and I are both overweight, however I live a very healthy diet, full of greens etc. I have lost 35 kg over the last 3 years, and continue to do so. I have regular 28 day cycle periods... (and believe me i know this is accurate as I cry every time it comes and I discover I am not pregnant... again)
This means we have now been trying for 6 months. I know this is no great amount of time, however I can't shake my gut feeling. We went to a dr to have our health checked, and while she strongly warned my husband to shed weight, she also told me despite needing to lose some more weight, i am one of the healthiest people shes ever met, and in perfect health to begin trying for a baby.
People keep telling us; "your time will come. it takes time. dont stress until its been a year". but we are now going to book for a sperm test, as we just cant handle the wait. we want this more than anything.
I'm not even sure what I am asking, I am just very emotional right now as just because cramping again for the 7 month in a row of trying, and its brought me to tears. Any advice, tips, stories you can provide me would help... we are now ready to do ANYTHING.
thankyou xx
Re: Desperate to fall pregnant... :(
The bump has an infertility board-
http://community.thebump.com/cs/ks/forums/4236698/ShowForum.aspx
Read Taking Charge of your Fertility
http://www.amazon.com/Taking-Charge-Your-Fertility-Reproductive/dp/0060937645
The stressing out is probably not helping. 6 months is not very long at all for trying, you need to give it time. If it doesn't happen after a year THEN I would start checking with the doctor.
Listen to PP's recommendation, the book is a great place to start.
This. Read the book, then see your doctor after 12 months of TTC with no success.
Agreed. It took us exactly 12 months to get pg.
Call me Kat =^..^=
I agree with the rec to check out TCOYF.
How old are you? Depending on your age, six months of trying may indeed merit a workup. I'm not sure where the cut-off is (maybe 30yrs old?), but I know that, when I was age 33, I was told that if I was not pregnant after six months of trying, my H and I should both start infertility workups.
It would be helpful to him, too, to start taking care of his health and dropping a few pounds -- and if he wears briefs, have him switch to boxers. It has to do with the temperature of the scrotum.:)
TCOYF is a great suggestion --- if you haven't started charting your periods, do so starting now. I believe the book will tell you how to do it.
I totally understand your worry and your frustration. I was exactly the same way. I went off BC in January of 2010 and we tried and tried and every month I'd end up in tears when my period showed up. By October, my husband refused to deal with the tracking/ovulation kits/ etc anymore. He said I was getting too stressed and that wasn't going to help. He said we should just take a break and that we'd see a doctor in January. I agreed and the next month we were pregnant
A few months after my son was born, I looked at my husband and told him that I was glad it had taken so long. I decided it took that long because we had to wait for the right baby, the one we were meant to have. He's an awesome kid and I wouldn't change one thing.
It's frustrating and it's sad. But when you finally get there, it is completely worth the wait.
If you are over 35, I'd keep looking for a doctor who will begin working with you now that you have reached the 6 month point without getting pg. Some doctors will begin tests that early if you are over 35.
However, if you are under 35, know that trying to conceive for 6-12 months can be perfectly normal.
Just FYI, it took me 10 cycles the first time and 13 the second time. I conceived at ages 31 and 35. The last 7 months of TTC#2 were really hard, though! But longer than 6 months was "normal" for me and my DH, apparently!
Honestly, I would stay off the "trying to conceive" boards. In retrospect, all the agonizing and posting on a daily basis, watching people come on the board and get pg within a few months -- ugh! It was part of what made TTC#2 harder than #1 for me. With #1 I was blissfully unaware, and it was easier.
Best of luck. And like PPs suggested, wait until the 12 month mark. It's up to you if you want to check out the Trying To Get Pregnant board on TheBump, but like one PP mentioned - it may not be the best and can sometimes be a debbie downer hearing about others getting pregnant.
This- have your husband checked
THIS!
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