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Soldier Returning Home
Hi all! I've never posted here and mostly stick to TK, but I have a military situation that I'm hoping for some advice on.
My brother has been in Kuwait since October as an MP, and returned to the States this morning. He'll have 5 days there before he returns to the armory (he's National Guard).
The situation that I'm worried about is this: Literally 45 minutes after returning stateside, his (ex)FI calls to him she's been seeing another guy and dumps him. My mom called me to let me know, and I can honestly say I've never been so mad in my life. She's been staying with my parents during my brother's deployment, but up and moved out about a month ago. After breaking up with my brother, she posted on FB how happy she was.
I've kept my mouth shut, but I don't know what the best course of action is for when he returns home. I also don't know what his frame of mind will be, since it was his first deployment and then this mess. I was just hoping for some advice on if there's anything we can do to make his transition home easier, whether we should have some sort of welcome home party or if he'd rather not, etc.
Thanks in advance.
Re: Soldier Returning Home
Follow his cues. Honestly when I got home, I wanted to shove my face at all my favorite restaurants and hang out with my friends and family. I didn't want a big party. I wanted to see people on my time. Maybe ask him if he'd like to do something just the two of you? Don't babysit him but call and check on him, if he starts to shut everyone out or act out in a way that isn't him just let him know you're there. There's a transition at first and he may just need to figure it out but if it persists or gets scary(anger or depression) get him help. Don't let him wait.
There are a ton of resources(Military One Source is the biggest) and unless he threatens someone(or himself) it's confidential and it can't hurt his career. He'll still have Tricare for 6 months after returning home so he has no excuse not to seek the care he may need.
If y'all are wanting to have a party, I'd wait a while. I can't imagine him being excited about a party with his fiance just admiting that she's a big doucheface. Like BLT said, just take cues from him.
When my H comes back from deployments, he want's ice cold beer, all of his favorite foods, a night at the movies and chill time. You might ask your brother if he would like to go to the movies and dinner with you. Maybe you could just have a fire in the back yard, a cooler of beer and some bbq. Invite him and onlt a few other other people over for a chill night.