Sex & Romance
Dear Community,

Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.

If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.

Thank you.

Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.

Sex advice

Re: Sex advice

  • Communicate. With. HIM.

    Every time people come here talking about issues in their sex life, usually with a fianc? or husband, it could be easily solved by a frank and open discussion with said person. You know, the guy who shares in your sex life? Tell him how you feel, not a bunch of strangers on the internet. It's best to have this discussion fully clothed, by the way, and not in the heat of the moment.

  • Does he know how you feel about your sex life? Tell him that you would like a little more variety, and maybe watch some porn together or look up some sex positions and talk about what you would like to try. Also you could try masterbating to see what feels good, and then show him. If you don't say anything, he will never know how you feel. He cant read your mind. Don't be afraid to ask for what you want. He will probably be grateful that you are giving him some guidance in the bedroom.
    Daisypath Anniversary tickers image
  • He's sexually inexperienced. He figures, "hey, x, y and z worked great to get her hot the last time, I'll do it all the time."

    He needs to change things up.

    And yes, you need to talk to him. "Honey, you're red hot and I think it would be even hotter if you ___________________" and you supply the rest.

    You can control the foreplay, too --- you can add a few things of your own to do to him --- or yourself --- to change things around.

    You probably don't have the urge because you need to get into the mood -- also, if you are taking oral BC it can indeed snuff your libido. Talk to a doc about other bc you can use or use a barrier method that's non hormonal like a diaphragm or a condom. 

     

  • imageTarponMonoxide:

    He's sexually inexperienced. He figures, "hey, x, y and z worked great to get her hot the last time, I'll do it all the time."

    He needs to change things up.

    And yes, you need to talk to him. "Honey, you're red hot and I think it would be even hotter if you ___________________" and you supply the rest.

    You can control the foreplay, too --- you can add a few things of your own to do to him --- or yourself --- to change things around.

    You probably don't have the urge because you need to get into the mood -- also, if you are taking oral BC it can indeed snuff your libido. Talk to a doc about other bc you can use or use a barrier method that's non hormonal like a diaphragm or a condom. 

     

    This is great advice. Listen to Tarpon. I would definitely second COMMUNICATION. Someone who is less experienced will sometimes repeat what worked in the past because they have not had a variety of partners to show them diverse techniques. When I was with the guy I lost my virginity to (and vice versa), it was a little awkward in the beginning because we did not have a large knowledge base. However, we were both very open communicators, and tried out enough different things that we got into a groove.  

  • What I also suggest:  sex manuals for couples that are sold in mainstream bookstores.

    Browse, have a look at them and decide which one you like the best. Education and learning is the key to it all, along with working on your sex life together.:)
  • imageartbyallie:

    Communicate. With. HIM.

     

    Agreed. It might be awkward, but it will really help. Also, while in bed you can say if you like what hes doing or not, or suggest he do something else. He just wants to please you.  

    Warning No formatter is installed for the format bbhtml
  • Well, nothing is going to happen if you're just going to wait for the problem to solve itself. You should talk to him and tell him that you want to try something new. http://www.cosmopolitan.com/sex-love/positions/ <-- there's a site with some positions to get you started.

     

    Also, everyone doesn't want to have sex all the time. Don't feel like a bad person if sometimes you just don't feel like having sex. 

    I love this man.

    Photobucket

    Can vacation be now please? Vacation
  • ~NB~~NB~ member
    5000 Comments Combo Breaker
    imageJacklynRoss93:

    How can I get him to change things up? Tell him to change things up.

    What other things can we do to spice it up? Whatever you want.

    One more question, when he comes up to me rubbing and getting all lovey dovey with me how come I don't the urge to do anything? Because he isn't arousing you by doing those things.

    Warning No formatter is installed for the format bbhtml
  • Also, talk to him while you are having sex...oh, yes honey, it feels great when you rub there, could you do that thing with your tongue you did last week, gee, that isn't working for me right now, could you try ____. Also, get familiar with what turns you in when you are alone, do you need vibration, certain types if touches? Communication really is key. Also, if you are not feeling it, it is absolutely ok to tell him that.
  • Communicate.

    My DH has have more partners with me but I have had more sex overall. Because of this he has really only done a few positions since he was only with one or two of those girls for longer periods of time. 
    I, on the other hand, love crazy rough sex and I have been able to do this since I was with my past partners for long periods of time and we were open.

    What I am trying to say is I had to talk to him, I told him what I liked even though it can be embarrassing, not sure how he would take it. I told him what I wanted him to do and asked him what his fantasies were or what he always wanted to try. No matter how crazy the things he wanted to do were I would try them. The amazing thing is that he is a freak just like me and are open to doing everything. We were able to bring out relationship to a whole new level because of it.
    You will never know how much you mean to me my little jelly Bean.
    Mommy loves you Eevee! Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
    <a href="http://s834.photobucket.com/albums/zz270/cpali/?action=view
  • But, really? You can't do the same thing 3 times in a row? Do you get bored that easily? Hell, it's not like you're eating peas every night for 2 months. You shouldn't get bored that easily. Now, if it was the same thing every single time over the course of months, sure. But THREE times and you're over it?

    This is a cheating disaster waiting to happen.

  • Talk to him now before wedding time. You dont need this hanging over your head. Your not a bad person, and hes probably feeling the same way. Time to spice things up
Sign In or Register to comment.
Choose Another Board
Search Boards