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Confused and maybe im doing something wrong....

ive been married since Nov 11th 2011.

i am 19 and my husband is 21.

i am currently pregnant.

i dont think he understands the concept that i am trying so hard to get a job at 27 weeks pregnant and he NEEDS ONE!!!         We just moved to Port Saint Lucie, Florida because this is where he wanted to go soooooo bad. im worried that he is not grasping the concept that he HAS to get a job and quit fooling around.. Just today we went with one of his old friends and they just wanted to ride around in my car all over the place...i have $20 left to last me in gas for another month...i dont have money to fill up the gas tank and go out to eat all the time. And he begs me to come but its not fun for me....ive never weighed over 100 pounds ever (high metabolism) and now i weigh like 120 something..my legs hurt.

I honestly am writing because i was hopin someone is or has been in the same situation as me and what should i do?!?

I love him to death..and i know he loves me, he wanted so badly to get a tattoo with my name in it and got it recently..

Also i dont know if it should bother me but i cant sleep at night (baby symptom) and he doesnt care...i mean he sees me get up and get on the computer and doesnt care....also my back hurts ALL the time and he once again doesnt care.....my legs...my knees...but i always get dragged around and he doesnt seem to see how it affects me...

but i dont think he should be playing around, we have 1 month to find jobs because we are currently staying with his Uncle..

i feel like he doesnt see the point!! just dont understand. i dont know what to do. anyone help!! :/

 

Re: Confused and maybe im doing something wrong....

  • I can kinda relate to this. I am 30 weeks pregnant, I looked for jobs but they won't hire someone who is pregnant, My man he doesn't have a job, he rarely tries, but he is going to school online. He is 20 and I am 22. We are currently living with my parents, it is really tough though...
  • If I were you I would tell him that he needs to grow up.

    I would tell him that you are going to stay with family or a friend for a few days. This way you can think about what you want out of your life. I would not want to stay with a man who wouldn't even looking for a job.

    I know you moved to your current city so he could be closer to his family and friends but did he have a job in your old city? Did you? 

    The most beautiful things in the world are not seen nor touched. They are felt with the heart. -- Helen Keller Daisypath Anniversary tickers
  • You're 19, pregnant and married with no jobs, no money and living with your husband's uncle.

    Yes, you're doing something wrong. 

    Get serious about getting your life on track now for this baby - he doesn't get the keys to your car to go joyriding with his friends. You find a job. He finds a job. You try to stay with the uncle a bit longer so you can save up to get a cheap place to live, probably with housemates.

    You don't have money for gas, or jobs, but you are getting tattoos professing your love for each other?

    Have you got any sort of medical plan for yourself and the baby? Is moving back (alone) in with your family an option for you?

    If this is MUD, well played. Well played. 

     

    image

    Chronically hilarious - you'll split your stitches!
    I wrote a book! Bucket list CHECK!
  • What is wrong with you? Have good decisions not yet been invented where you live? Betwee you and Schmucky Joe in the below post, I'm totally baffled. Leave the dead weight, go stay with a family member and try to get your *** together. 

    image Mabel the Loser.
  • The tattoo is where I lost it.
    image
  • imageReturnOfKuus:
    The tattoo is where I lost it.

    BUT HE LOVES HER


    image
    we all fall down sometimes
    brass and ballet flats
  • Yes you're doing something wrong! You're supposed to waste all the help given to you and wait until you're completely broke and homeless before doing something about it. Fortunately for you, it won't be too long now.

    image

    "If you wanna win then you shoulda put a hat on it. Don't be mad when you see a knit cap won it. If you wanna win then you shoulda put a hat on it."- Fenton

  • My ExH was just like this and I left him when DD was 15 months. He kept saying he was looking for a job and never was and spent every dime I made and never helped me during my pregnancy or after DD was born. He is STILL unemployed to this day and I have not rec'd a cent of child support.

    If he doesn't change soon, you need to have a real intervention with him or separate for awhile. This is not healthy for YOU or your baby!

    Good luck!

    TTC#2 with my hero, my inspiration, my United States Marine! Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker Image and video hosting by TinyPic
  • Liz4444Liz4444 member
    Fourth Anniversary

    imageReturnOfKuus:
    The tattoo is where I lost it.

    I don't know what that is in your siggy, but I love it!

    And OP, yes, you are doing many, many things wrong.

    Daisypath Happy Birthday tickersDaisypath Thanksgiving tickersphoto 307df189-2dc4-4bea-9b76-9ac6ceda8155_zps59ea37ee.jpgphoto c779d75a-0807-4fcc-b206-432ab43bdb6d_zpsf12ebd56.jpg
  • imageLiz4444:

    imageReturnOfKuus:
    The tattoo is where I lost it.

    I don't know what that is in your siggy, but I love it!

    And OP, yes, you are doing many, many things wrong.

     

    It's a baby sloth.

    image
  • Liz4444Liz4444 member
    Fourth Anniversary
    imageReturnOfKuus:
    imageLiz4444:

    imageReturnOfKuus:
    The tattoo is where I lost it.

    I don't know what that is in your siggy, but I love it!

    And OP, yes, you are doing many, many things wrong.

     

    It's a baby sloth.

    I want one!  It's adorable!

    Daisypath Happy Birthday tickersDaisypath Thanksgiving tickersphoto 307df189-2dc4-4bea-9b76-9ac6ceda8155_zps59ea37ee.jpgphoto c779d75a-0807-4fcc-b206-432ab43bdb6d_zpsf12ebd56.jpg
  • Wow first I want to say don't listen to these other stupid ass holes who know anything about you or your life. Second It does sound like there are some things that you need to address soon. I went through a very similar thing with my fiance. When our 1st child was born everything changed. Some men become a real man and realize what their responsibility's are when their children are born and some just don't. You are the only one who know the man that you married but if he isn't able to be there for you now regardless of the age you may have a bigger problem on your hands. You should be able to talk to him about this and how to make it better. Good luck.
  • imageTofumonkey:

    You're 19, pregnant and married with no jobs, no money and living with your husband's uncle.

    Yes, you're doing something wrong. 

    Get serious about getting your life on track now for this baby - he doesn't get the keys to your car to go joyriding with his friends. You find a job. He finds a job. You try to stay with the uncle a bit longer so you can save up to get a cheap place to live, probably with housemates.

    You don't have money for gas, or jobs, but you are getting tattoos professing your love for each other?

    Have you got any sort of medical plan for yourself and the baby? Is moving back (alone) in with your family an option for you?

    If this is MUD, well played. Well played. 

     

    Well said - my thoughts exactly!

    He was man enough to make a baby with you, now he needs to be man enough to get off his arse and find a job and support his family!

    Anniversary
  • imageSemperFiPurpleHeart:

    My ExH was just like this and I left him when DD was 15 months. He kept saying he was looking for a job and never was and spent every dime I made and never helped me during my pregnancy or after DD was born. He is STILL unemployed to this day and I have not rec'd a cent of child support.

    If he doesn't change soon, you need to have a real intervention with him or separate for awhile. This is not healthy for YOU or your baby!

    Good luck!

    You described my exH -  while I was pregnant with our 2nd child, I told him he needed to get a "real job" (we were travelling vendors) because I could not be on the road with a baby and a toddler.  He was offered a really good job right after 2nd DS arrived, but turned it down because he would have had to be on the job 4 days a week.  When DS was a year old, I went to work because his lazy a$$ refused to do so. 

    Anniversary
  • imageLiz4444:
    imageReturnOfKuus:
    imageLiz4444:

    imageReturnOfKuus:
    The tattoo is where I lost it.

    I don't know what that is in your siggy, but I love it!

    And OP, yes, you are doing many, many things wrong.

     

    It's a baby sloth.

    I want one!  It's adorable!

    Ummm.............baby sloths grow up to be big sloths...........but yes, it is adorable!

    Anniversary
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