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MIL Update (Long)
So I have been MIA lately.. super sorry about that. And I know you ladies have been asking for an update. I have only worked 1 half day this week the rest of the time as been spent with MIL or at home sick.
This week has been super busy and difficult for us. Monday I was home sick and Tuesday I was feeling better and then about noon I recieved a phone call from a social worker at the hospital. She said they would not allow MIL to leave the hospital until we had a nursing home or some where for her to go where she wasn't alone. This came as a shock to us even though H and I had been talking about it we thought we had another few weeks to dicuss options with her.
H and I rushed to the hospital to figure out what was going on. We then decided after talking with her that she would come live with us a do a hospice program since the doctors are refusing to do any more chemo or radiation. She still wants to be able to go to her doctor visits so this is a different type of hospice she will be doing. It was a compromise between what we thought she needed and what she wanted.
She is still very weak right now and can hardly walk. She does really good with a walker but not just holding on to someone. I spent all day Wednesday at the hospital with her talking to doctors and getting everything set up for her to come to our house. And yesterday H was off work so we went and started getting her stuff from her house and taking to ours. They also sent over a hospital bed for her to use which moves up and down just like in the hospital so that should help a lot. We had to clean out the guest bedroom to move her in there since it's a bigger room than the 3rd bedroom we have which still has wedding stuff in it.
They are talking about sending her home today which we are not ready for and I made a call this morning to her doctor to see if they can keep her till at least Monday. We still haven't moved half of her things plus we didn't have cable hooked up in that room and it will be next Thursday before it is hooked up. Plus we will not be able to leave her alone and since this is Father's Day weekend we had plans with my dad and to go see his dad and we can't do that without asking someone to stay with her and BIL isn't going to come do it since obviously they will be going to see his wife's dad.
I will be working just when I can. Thankfully I work for my parents who understand completely as my mom just went through this 3 years ago with my uncle. So since H works in construction you never know if they will keep steady work. So if he's off work or has an early day then he will stay with her while I go work. MIL has offered to help us with as much as she can financially if we need it.
BIL and SIL have offered to help a little he's available on Sundays and then she can help nights and weekends. Which may not be enough somedays but we will see. My mom has offered to help, some friends of ours, and the H's dad's family has offered to help. So far nothing from MIL's family to help but most of them may not even know yet.
All the prayers will be needed these next few months as we have a long hard road ahead of us. We got MIL to sign over medical power of attorney to H the other day which is great since he can then make decision if we feel she is not in her right mind which is basically is right now. She called 911 from the hospital the other night because she thought someone was breaking into her home. Thankfully she realized where she was before she hung up with them. We see her being on full hospice within the next month and then maybe going into a care facility.
We aren't sure if we can truely handle all this but we feel we can at least try and if it gets too much then we can always use other options. We know it is coming to the end and we have maybe 6 months left with her which will be tough but we have to do it.
Thanks for all the support ladies. Please keep the prayers coming!!!!
Re: MIL Update (Long)
Wow. That is a lot to deal with but it sounds like you and your H are handling it well. It's nice to have your family around to help out if you need it (flexible work hours etc).
I am sending good vibes that you can get through this difficult time. I know your MIL appreciates it very much.
Big hugs
First off, you never have to be sorry for needing to be gone for family stuff. While we miss you, we more than understand. It is nice to have you pop in, though!
It sounds like you and H really have worked things out together and have good plans. Stay strong together knowing you have T&P from all of us.
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Hang in there Mancila60. We went through this for almost a year straight between my grandfather and H's father. Even when you think you can't do this anymore, you will strength in each other. I promise you that your MIL knows what you are doing and even though she cannot or may not say it, she is thankful. Lean on each other when you need and know that it's ok.
You've got all your May girls behind you.....T&P's
You and your husband are amazing for all that you are doing for MIL. Thinking of you all during this time. Feel free to vent here whenever you need to.
Hugs to you Mancila.
Sounds like you two have a lot to handle! I think you guys are amazing to offer up your home being newlyweds. It may be hard sometimes but like PPs lean on each other. You will be in my thoughts and prayers as you will be for others I'm sure.
You have all us May girls here to talk to when you need it.