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Am I wrong to think this is weird?
While on our honeymoon, my new SIL got engaged! I am so happy for her and am very lucky because we actually have a great relationship. However, she has fallen in love my venue and is already in the process of booking her wedding there without even bothering to look anywhere else. She also wants to use the same DJ, florist, photog, etc. She did ask me if I was ok with this and I felt like I couldn't say no. I mean, on one hand I am very flattered she loved everything so much that she wants it for her own. It's just strange to me to think she'll basically be having my wedding this time next year. Being immediate family, half of the guest list will be the same and I can't help but wonder if some of them will just think of it as NM's wedding part 2. I personally would not want that if I were her. I did bring this concern up to her and she just said she didn't care. MIL also thinks it's a great idea since we've gotten so many great compliments about the wedding and she wants that for her daughter. H thinks this is completely ridiculous as do the few friends I've talked with. It is what it is, but I guess I just wanted to vent and see what others think.
Re: Am I wrong to think this is weird?
I think it is a little weird, too. I guess it would be one thing if it was a friend and there would be very little overlap in the guest list, but obviously like you said half the family would have been the same.
If it were me, even if I loved the venue, I'd definitely not want to have my wedding at the same place. Guests probably aren't going to notice that she has the same DJ/florist/photog., but they'll remember the venue for sure. I would personally want to make my wedding unique, seeing as your guys' as so close together. I guess I just wouldn't want my family members reminiscing about something that happened at my wedding a few years from now and being like "oh, was that X's wedding or Y's wedding? I can't remember, they got married at the same place...."
That being said, it's not something I would get super upset about, either. I probably would have voiced the same concern as you did, and if she doesn't care I guess that's that. But you are right, it is kind of weird.
I think it's weird. My brother got married in 2009 and I LOVED his venue. However I didn't want to sort of "steal" his wedding so we didn't even look there.
As long as she's okay with it though, I guess its fine. I would be annoyed though.
I think it is weird, but I guess as long as she's okay with it, what can you do? It is a huge compliment to you though.
I definitely can understand your concern...but I wouldnt stress about it...I think the first thing you do as a bride is ask people that you know that have recently gotten married..for references...Also thank god different people have different styles and taste
I had my wedding at the same church that a friend did (I belong to the church..he did not)..a few years earlier..but the decor was totally different...so no comparison....and the reception venue was the same as a friends last year...once again..once decorated the room had no resemblance to theirs...
I also used the same photog as another friend..photography is an art..no two painting are identical..we choose different sites..and I told him which poses I wanted...Check them out on facebook..studio five-o photography...she is the bride with purple..I am the bride with yellow...
Your SIL will choose different colors, scheme, ideas, flowers, draping, linen and her dress...it wont be your wedding!
This is how I thought about it..there are only so many weekends in the year..there will wedding before and after our at the venue..but no one is the SAME..
and she has plenty of time to change her mind about different aspects..maybe by the time they choose a date..your people will be already booked..and budget plays a part also..you dont know if theyll be able to afford the people that you hired..or that theyll click once they sit down for a consult..and if she hires a coordinator...she expand her contacts..not just to your florist..caterer..linen company..etc..hope that helps
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I agree with this. Just because some of the vendors are the same doesn't mean the wedding will be the same.... honestly if it were me, I would take it as a compliment that she loved my vendors' work so much that she wants to have them as well.
This. I asked a lot of coworkers about the vendors they used because I could get a real review of how those people performed. I wish we could have gotten this for the venue we used (they REALLY dropped the ball).
As pps have said, no wedding is exactly the same, so I'm sure that the execution will separate your wedding from her's. I wouldn't be weirded out by this unless she also decided to choose the same colors and theme as you.
I would be extremely annoyed! HOPEFULLY it looks different then your wedding. Sorry you gotta deal with that
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I defiantly think it's weird! I can't imagine why anyone would want to do this! When I went to look at my "dream venue," I brought FSIL (at the time) w/me and she ended up talking with the catering manager about having HER reception there. The worst thing was she was kinda planning hers last minute so hers would have been before mine. The whole thing freaked me out and I never looked at that venue again. I was totally ready to book that day too. But, it all worked out in the end because I'm thrilled with where we ended up having it..
at least your wedding was before hers?