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Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Do you know if your parents have wills, etc.
I had a convo w/ my sister about our parents finances and we were discussing how we have almost no idea about their financial position and retirement accounts. Its sort of annoying b/c if anything were to happen to them, I would likely be the executor of their estate, but I seriously have no idea about any of their accounts, etc.
I kinda want to have a discussion w/ them about their plans/expectations for the future and see if I can get them to write wills and do something to lay out what's what.
Re: Do you know if your parents have wills, etc.
They have simple wills laying out the basics. (It's just them and me, so the situation is pretty straightforward.) My father also has a detailed living will and advance directive/medial POA that I prepared for him at his (very strong) request. Not the most pleasant subject, but if it was going to exist, I'm happy knowing a competent attorney prepared it.
My father has walked me through all of the details of their finances, etc., a number of times. I would definitely ask them to talk you through everything. It might be awkward; but G-d forbid anything ever happens you will all feel better knowing that you know what you need to know to handle things for them. When my dad got sick a few years ago, it was good to know at least that was under control.
lovelylittleworld
BFP#2 1/12/12 ~ Missed M/C 8w2d
I don't know the details of my parents' financial situation but I know my dad has everything in order. They have advanced directives (or something) for me (and my sister, secondary) to make medical decisions. They have some kind of trusts set up as well. The last I heard, I was not the executor of their estate (I was still a minor at this time), but they may have changed it since.
It's not a particularly pleasant thing to discuss, but my dad is organized and realistic about these things and has made arrangements as far as I know.
BFP#1: 01/10, M/C 6w -- BFP#2: 06/10, M/C 5w -- BFP#3: 09/10, DS born June 1, 2011
BFP#4: 07/12, M/C 5w3d -- BFP#5: 12/12, EDD 08/18/13
Decorate This
My parents are in total denial and plan nothing, but yet are control freaks (especially my dad) its a great combo. Its funny too b/c my Dad has had such a mess w/ his own mother - managing her finances and coordinating w/ his brothers, etc. I would think he would be Johnny Organized about this.
mine do, its in their safe, we are planning to have that discussion soon. my parnets are fairly young though, dad is not 60 yet.
I know in my teens my mom had one, but I have no idea if she has amended it since she married my step-dad (they dated for 15 years before getting married). My mom has hounded my step-dad to get something, especially after his cancer and other medical issues that went along with that. I think they might have gone together and figured it all out. Besides their house, I do know all their finances are separate, so it might be easier.
I think I need to have a talk with my mom, thanks for bringning it up!
But, it would be up in the air and the state would take a signifcantly larger portion if they die w/o wills.
Good point. Sounds like I have some fun conversations in store this weekend.
I guess it i a morbid topic, but I have brought it up with my mom. She has a will and my sister and I have durable power of attorney. Mom also has an advanced directive. The will has been updated in the past two years, detailing what my sister and I get as far as money.Non-monetary assets, such as furniture will be dealt with when the time comes. I am the executrix of her estate. My and my sister's names are on all accounts, too.
My dad has named my other sister and I as beneficiaries and I am not sure which one of us is executrix of his will. I don't care as long as someone is. He also has an advanced directive, but I don't know if he has assigned power of attorney to anyone. Next time I talk to him, I will ask him about that. He is not married and does not live near family. Plus, he doesn't talk to his one living sibling.
My dad originally sat us down about 10 years ago to go over everything - their wills, life insurance, etc.
Now that my sister and I are both married, parents retired and moved, etc, we sat down as a family over Christmas to discuss what has changed.
I don't know the law in MD but in SC, they have to choose one person to make the final decisions. This defaulted to me since I'm older (and more rational lol) but my sister and I hope to make the decisions jointly.
In addition to the financial side, My parents were clear about their DNR wishes, when to pull the plug, cremation plans, etc. They didn't leave anything out.
It's not a pleasant conversation but a necessary one.