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Vent
I am EXHAAAAUSTED! And my head is hurting so bad I feel nauseous. I think my new birth control pill is making my body wacko because I start spotting and cramping two weeks into the pack and now am getting headaches.
DH and I live 1 hr 15 minutes from where we grew up and all of our family and most of our friends still live there. We are CONSTANTLY going back there to visit and for all holidays, birthdays, grad parties, weddings, etc. It's never ending. Before we had the baby it was hard, but now it's almost unbearable. I don't want to not see them, but packing everything up and driving down there all the time is wearing on me. We were there the last two weekends and are going next weekend and it throws the baby off schedule. Last night he was up almost every hour crying I think just because he was tired and out of his element.
We have discussed moving back but DH doesn't want to quit his job and I will not be able to find a job in my field down there. It is just so frustrating. And it's really hard to make good friends here because we are always out of town on the weekends. I am trying to convince DH to move closer so he can still keep his job but we'll only be 30 minutes away from family.
And tonight since I feel crappy I asked DH to take care of the baby and all I hear is the baby screaming.
Re: Vent
Im so sorry Kristen!!
Its so hard not to jump in and just want to make them stop crying and just cuddle them.
I know the feeling about traveling to see family...mine are about an hour as well...it is so exhausting. I hope you get a break soon and they come to you guys!!
xoxo hang in there!!! (((hugs)))
Sorry, Kristen, that things are so tiring. I know that we get tired when we are busy on a regular basis and it is just the 2 of us.
While moving closer is an option, consider other less drastic options as well. Maybe prioritize when you go back. Possibly do not accept last minute invites that you are not prepared for that force you to run around more. Maybe set a limit of only going back 2 weekends a month.
I don't know if these ideas will help you but they are what came to mind.
Like Cari said, hang in there!
I'm so sorry to hear. I know how you feel. We live 2 and 5 hours away from our families and while my fam has adjusted and made compromises. My ILs not so much, but we are trying to stand strong and not cave in. Christmas will be a wake-up call for them, but oh well, they are kind of childish anyway. But I digress, it is hard having to travel with a kiddo all the time. Thankfully, this upcoming trip is our last big traveling anywhere for quite a while, because I am so sick of DD's sleep issues because of her schedule being constantly thrown off because of the travelling. So yeah, I am there with you, I haven't had more than 4-5 hours a night since early May....In short, I feel you and I totally support you doing what's before for C. The more you screw with his sleep the worse it will get, trust me.
and it's hard to hear but your H needs to learn how to soothe C and C has to learn that it's okay for Dad to be the one to calm him down. it's hard at first but they will both learn.
**hugs**
thanks. I actually did have to jump in because he was crying so hard, and as soon as I picked him up he was fine. Then the remainder of the time until bedtime I couldn't leave his sight or he'd flip out. I had to work today and left him with the sitter and he was fine, but not sure if he is just starting to get seperation anxiety or what.
It's just been a rough day and a rough couple nights. DH doesn't understand what it's like to be needed 24/7 and never get a moment to yourself! And he felt terrible because he couldn't calm him down and help me out.
Just hoping for some sleep tonight!!!!!
and what's weird is that he is hardly ever like that. He will almost always go to DH, so I'm not sure if he's just entering the seperation anxiety stage or what.
Our families are good about visiting us, but the problem is there's a billion of them all in one area, and only 3 of us where we're at. So they come to visit the baby and we host an occasional holiday, but 95% of the events are a long drive away. And while they understand if we can't make it to things, I have always been close with my family and I hate missing out on things.
Hang in there. Hopefully better days and more sleep will be coming your way soon. It must be so hard with a LO. I hate to miss out on family events too. My brother and SIL and nephew live an hour away and I feel like I need to hang out with them all day and not just a few hours due to the drive and not seeing them as often as if they lived closer. Nestie vibes to you!!!
this!!! B was like that for quite some time and she was over it...and I totally get dh not getting it...mine was the same, its hard for them but baby is used to us being with them almost all the time! hope you got some sleep
It's tough. My family is super close & I'm the only one who doesn't live within five miles of my mom & I come home for everything major (certain birthdays, high school graduations, first communions, confirmations for god children, weddings). I miss being there for everything, and in the 12 years I haven't lived there, there have only been two drama filled events based on planning around my schedule in those 12 years.
Last summer we were gone almost every single weekend & dealing with major home repairs, etc (b/c of the tornado last summer). I was burnt out by September. This summer we decided to travel no more than one weekend a month. Instead of dreading it, I am now excited!! We are going to see my family once, going to see DHs brother once, and going away by ourselves for one weekend. It helps that my family is in between major life events right now (3 more years before HS graduations begin again!)
It took a while to make friends here- and we don't see them nearly as much as we used to! DH & I happen to have met through mutual friends, so we have a core group of 3-4 couples we are friends with. DHs college roommate lives close by & I have some other friends in the area too. But it has been tough to make that transition from single friends to married friends! We are 30-45 min without traffic away from the city- and most of my still single friends live in the city. The friends we see the most live in the burbs, too.
I have friends that moved to the middle of nowhere- and they started to meet people through a mommy & me kind of class. Maybe that's an option for you?