August 2006 Weddings
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Anyone's parents divorce while you were an adult?

I found out over the weekend that a couple of my friends' parents are divorcing. Friends are in their late 20s or early 30s. Any advice on how to be a good, supportive friend?

Re: Anyone's parents divorce while you were an adult?

  • Sorry for your friends!  I haven't been through it, but as with most things, I'd offer to be there if they want to talk about it or be distracted or whatever but also respectful if they withdraw a little.  Everyone probably handles it a little differently, so you have to trust your gut with your friends.

    I imagine it sucks no matter what age you are. Sad

  • My college roommate's parents divorced our senior year.  She was relieved.  Happy about it, even.

    Did this come as a shock to your friends?  I'd say just offer to be a willing ear if they need to talk.

  • I don't know anyone recently, but there are several different types of divorce, i.e. reasons and how everyone feels. So a divorce over someone cheating or because someone is an alcoholic is different than a divorce where the two have been separated for years already. If it was a good friend I would ask how they are doing and how they feel about it all. I am sure there is a bit of "never thought I'd be in one of those families" there. Its a lot to wrap your head around as an adult so it might help for her to talk it all out as she deals with all the changes.
  • My parents divorced when I was small, so I have no advice for this situation. But I have plenty of pointers on how to do two Thanksgivings or two Christmases in one day!

    Also, if your friends start to feel like their families are all screwed up, get a bottle of wine and rent Home for the Holidays (with Holly Hunter, Robert Downey Jr., Dermott Mulroney, and Claire Danes)...seriously, it will make anybody feel like she has a normal family in record time!

    Warning No formatter is installed for the format bbhtml
  • My parents divorced a couple of years ago. In fact, they were separated at my wedding. Good times.

    I was upset about it, but I guess I felt like I had my own life, so I wasn't nearly as affected as I might have been if I was younger. I'd say just be there for them if they want to talk.

    BabyFruit Ticker
  • My parents divorced when I was 30, I think. I thought it was a good idea - they both wanted to do different things. So I cant say how to be supportive, but if your friend is an adult, they should be able to tell you themsleves. Just let them know if they need anything, you can help out.?
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