Married Life
Dear Community,
Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Going Crazy!
So this is kinda crazy but I just got married a month ago and I am really struggling. Married life is great and I am still totally in love with my husband, but I have taken a few hits lately and I just can't seem to get over it. I graduated with a teaching degree in 2011 and I have been working as a long-term sub for the last year at a local middle school. Well the position I had been subbing for came open and I interviewed for the job two days before my wedding. I had an awesome relationship with the administration (I thought) and the interview was wonderful, but I got an email two days ago that they decided to go with another candidate. I was/am totally devastated. All of my co-workers, family, and friends thought I was a sure thing, but I guess not. In the mean time, I am a teacher so I am on summer break which means I am not working. I am home alone all the time and my husband gets home late from work and leaves early each morning. Since I just recently graduated from college, a lot of my friends are not around so I feel totally alone and to be honest a little depressed.
Re: Going Crazy!
Join a local volunteer group (soup kitchen, meals on wheels etc)
Take a art class
Join a yoga/Zumba/pilates class
Join a local hiking or walking club
Seriously, you need to find a hobby or activity that YOU enjoy to do and can fill some of your time with.
You can't rely on DH to fill your time when he is at work
Take advantage of the AWESOME opportunity you have for some "free time" until you do start working
I was in this position earlier this summer. It really feels almost like a betrayal, doesn't it? When I start to feel sad (or angry might be more like it) about the situation, I just try to redirect my attention. I do a craft, or go for a walk/run. I keep myself busy enough in the summer that I'm not just sitting around moping.
Also, I make applying for jobs fun for me...I go to my favorite coffee shop, get an iced coffee, and work until my parking expires. :-) That helps make it seem less like pointless work and more of a positive part of my day! Good luck!
my read shelf:
Have you ever thought about independent sales? I do it on the side, and it is a really great way to get invested in something, meet new people, and make money. If you really love the product, it's not work at all.
I'm absolutely new to this message board thing, but if you can email or direct message, I can definitely give you more information if you are interested.
Good luck!
Kristi G.
I'm sorry you're having a tough time. Keep it in mind that things will change; this too shall pass.
My hubby was working crazy hours for our first two years of marriage. (Like 60-70 hours per week, and crazy shifts.) We were hardly seeing each other, and my career was taking way more time than I expected to get off the ground, so I was spending a lot of time at home by myself, semi-miserable.
We just made a big change. He took a paycut to work close to home and work a regular 40 hour week. We moved, sold things, cut every expense we could to make this happen. My business is starting to pick up, and I am currently seeking part time work to make sure I have some guaranteed income coming in, and help take the financial stress off of him.
I know that this isn't possible for everyone, but it has made a huge difference for us. Have you thought about taking part time work, even if it's not in your field, just to get some time out of the house and some human interaction? It might help you feel a little better, like it's not all wasted time (not that you should, but that's how I often felt).
Other than that, try finding a constructive hobby, like planting a vegetable garden. It's great to see tangible results from something you've put your time into. Agree with PP, try a yoga or zumba class, it might lead to some new friends in your area that you can spend time with.
Hope things turn around for you soon