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Feel bad for DH - kind of long mini vent
For some background: DH is a pretty solitary guy. He loves his space and his computer time. This works well in our relationship as I love my space and to read. MIL often comments that she doesn't know how I handle DH. We really are pretty perfect for each other. We still spend plenty of us time together cuddling and watching movies or going out. We just also spend plenty of time apart.
Being such a homebody leads to DH not having very many friends. When I met DH, he really only had one friend which was from high school that he still hung out with. I thought it was awesome he was still friends with the guy after all that time, but they aren't really friends anymore. This other guy is definitely stuck in the party all the time mode even with three kids and DH isn't a party person. I guess he used to more before he met me but now he says he doesn't like it (not by my influence here either). That was the whole best man drama from last summer.
Anyways, DH started hanging out with another old high school friend a few months ago who just had a new baby. Sadly he's very much an alcoholic and after a few times hanging out, DH is pretty much just Facebook friends with him now. I know he wishes that he had friends to hang out with, but since he rarely likes to go places, he doesn't make new friends. His job is work from home, so he doesn't work directly with his co-workers. For the most part, I know DH is happily content playing his video games while I'm not home.
He's having to complete a bunch of paperwork today to get a pass for the military base he gets tech calls for on an almost daily basis. Having the pass would greatly speed up his daily process of getting in there. The paperwork is asking for 3 references who are not family and know him really well. And they wanted someone who lived close by who wasn't family to verify he'd lived in his house for more than 3 years. The house part isn't an issue, he can put down our neighbor. But the 3 references are giving him problems. He has one old co-worker he's still in contact with that he can put. But needs people for the other two. He is probably going to put both of his old friends mentioned above just because he can't think of anyone else. He was calling me for ideas and it just made me kind of sad for him.
Now I don't have a lot of close friends either, but I at least have one friend local to do a girls night if I need it. I love hanging out with my MIL so I consider her a friend as well as family. I've got several great friends still in Kansas but don't get to see them often. I guess my point is that I wouldn't have a problem with references even though I don't really have more than one local friend who isn't family. I honestly think it's something about Oklahoma. In Kansas I didn't have the same amount of problems in finding friends or people to hang out with. I guess I'm kind of feeling sorry for myself too and missing my Kansas friends. No, I don't want to move back there.
Thanks for letting me get that out. Sorry for the length. Just feeling kind of down for DH which in turn led to me feeling down for me. The longer I live in this state the more I don't like it. *sigh*
Re: Feel bad for DH - kind of long mini vent