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For my boyfriend (work woes)
So my boyfriend doesn't work 9 to 5. He has had three jobs since we've been dating (1 year). This year that we spent together was both of our senior years of college (so obviously he hasn't worked full-time and these are blow off lame jobs). He says he has always had a problem with being the low man on the totem pole. Currently he is working at a bar, he thought he would be a bartender but the guy told him he was just going to bar back. He feels like at this job and his other recent employment that he has been treated very unfairly by co-workers. I.E. them telling him what to do (people that aren't his boss or have more authority than he does). He gets so defeated by these people.
My two thoughts on this:
1.) He has a degree (we graduated in May) and the other people aren't ever going to have one and therefore treat him like that because they are jealous of what he has
2.) He is non confrontational with coworkers (therefore when they tell him to do something that they could easily do, he just does it because he doesn't want to cause drama. He therefore makes himself the victim by not sticking up for himself
Any thoughts?
Re: For my boyfriend (work woes)
Sure.
Restaurants are ALL ABOUT low man on the totem pole. You have to earn your respect by doing the grunt work, showing that you are worth your salt.
People in restaurants don't care whether or not you have a degree. They care whether or not you are a team player. Finishing a degree and working in the food industry at the same time are fairly common. The fact that your BF has his degree probably is not an issue for them at all.
He should deal with doing the grunt work, but ask for help with anything he needs too.
I agree with the PP. There are tons of places where how much experience or what degree you have doesn't matter - how long you have been there does. I just started at a place in that exact boat - there are high school and college kids that are higher on the totem pole than me, even though I have multiple times the experience and am pursuing a graduate degree in this field.
Even if he isn't saying anything, he might be giving off the vibe that he thinks he's too good to do the low job. You can get far in life by putting effort into every little thing you do professionally, rather than acting like you're too good to do something or that it's beneath you. If he takes it seriously and shows them that he's committed, he might actually get somewhere.
I agree with both of you! Although I can't watch him at work, I'm sure he gives off the air that he is above the job and the people working there.
The problem with one of the responses though is that he started at both of his recent jobs at the same times the others did, and he still was the low man. I think that had more to deal with the bosses personal preference.
This post kinda doesn't matter though because he is starting a new job soon...an actual career job and not bs work!! So we are pretty excited to see how that will go! The other men have more experience than him, but he is younger and has worked with the new programs...so it should be interesting!
This is highly offensive. Retaurant work is not BS work...it is obvious that you and he think this way and THIS is why he is getting the crap jobs there. Many, many people make livings out of restaurant work. Also, I didn't want to say this before, but a bachelor's degree is pretty much a joke these days (I have one too). They are like graduating form high school. Everybody has one and it isn't THAT big of a deal anymore.
I agree. That first bolded section is highly offensive. MY DH is a restaurant manager. He's been in restaurants all his life (minus a couple of years right out of HS). Yes, you have to work your way up, but that is the same with any position. Restaurant managers definitely do not get the credit they deserve. So many people think that restaurant jobs are for people that are worthless and can't do anything else. Sad thing is...restaurant jobs, expecially management makes decent money and it's HARD work.
TTC since June 2012