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what's a dream and what's a goal?
Maybe I'm in a funk right now, but it seems like the goals I have for how I always pictured my life would be still seems so far away. Granted I've only been out of college a few years, but do you ever just feel like your dream house (for example) is just that - a dream? And maybe you should set your sights a little lower for a "goal" house?
Don't get me wrong, H and I have great jobs (and I think they're fairly safe) and we do well. We just have our SL debt looming over our heads (which we're going to work hard to knock out in the next few years), but we always think once that's gone we'll be rich! (for us that is) and we can move on w/ our lives with the rest of the goals we want to accomplish (more travel, H wants to get his bachelor's, etc.)
But I'm afraid once that's gone, something else will be there that will be hanging over us (and I hope I won't feel that way about our mortgage as that's an expense most people do have). Does it ever end? Do you think there will be a point in your life when you think "finally, I have made it and couldn't want anything else." ?
Re: what's a dream and what's a goal?
I'll start at the end. ?No, I don't think there's a point where you think you've made it and want nothing else. ?Life wouldn't be worth living anymore if you were done.
But, I also think that you shouldn't have to be delaying what you want for a nebulous future. ?If you want to travel, make a definite plan for how you're going to accomplish that instead of just the nebulous "in the future." ?You shouldn't be waiting until the end of your life to start living it.
I think your goals and dreams should be the same. ?No, that doesn't mean settling. ?It means being realistic about dreams even if they're a stretch and setting a path to reach them.
Of course, I say this. ?I'm the worst example. ?I've given up planning given the twists our lives have taken in the last few years. ?I am not in control of where I live, so for the most part, I'm along for the ride.?
Do you think your dreams/goals are realistic? I view my goals as being more realistic than my dreams, but maybe that's just semantics. My "dream" house probably costs $10 million, and it's highly unlikely I'll ever live there. I don't consider that to be realistic. My "dream job" would be to travel around the world with my husband... yeah, not happening. But I also have a much more concrete career goal (based on reality, my education and my experiences) that I hope to achieve.
If you think your entire view of your future is out of whack, maybe you need to recalibrate your expectations?
To answer the last part of your question, I hope I never get to the point where I have no more goals in life! Otherwise, what's the point of doing anything? I think you can be happy with your life, but still have active goals.
I think the difference between a goal and a dream is that and goal has a deadline and a plan of action to accomplish it - and also a realistic level of accomplishment. In other words, you might have the dream of being a home owner, but the goal of buying a small starter house. You might have the dream of traveling a lot in general, but only have the goal of going to one or two places in the next 5 years.
This is the best way I have found to explain it to academic types: Up until this point, your life has been full of phases and stages. 4 years of school, 2 year of grad school, 1 year of travel in between, etc. The "real world" doesn't have deadlines or end points or graduations. It just goes on, and on and on. Its phases are longer and take more time for really no reason. Saving for things takes a ton of time, then something breaks and costs a ton of money. Someone gets sick and takes all your time. Then someone invites you to go somewhere expensive and crazy, or you get persuaded or guilted into it (lol). Its a crazy world. The reason I say all this, is that now, its all about what you wanna do - to make your own ideas and goal come true - but its gonna take longer and be harder and suck (a lot) at times. Its not gonna happen because its a certain date. Its not gonna happen because you are certain age. Its not gonna always happen even if you think you have an air-tight plan.
So yes, I would say make goals, and use your dreams as a guide. Feel free to tackle life and don't put your life or adventures on hold for the sake of having perfect finances. BUT, if it can't happen or doesn't happen when you think it should or could, then you can't get too jaded. thats life. Its just gonna take longer or be harder.
Sorry this post got kinda long
I am at the point in my life where I think I have accomplished many of the goals I had when I was in my early 20's. Sure, I still have goals, but I am content with my home, my job, my life, etc. I don't NEED anything else that money could buy.
Sure, I dream of hitting the Lotto and traveling for the rest of my life, etc. But things are good. My goals now focus more on enjoying life, having fun with my husband and my boys, working on some hobbies, etc......
I ditto pps - especially ditto. To me, goals are smaller, more obtainable dreams. I dream of a big beautiful house with a huge yard, but my most recently accomplished goal was to find a house that was nicer and a much shorter communte than where we were living. I reached my goal but not my dream.
As for your other question - no, it never f'ing ends! We've been *almost* to that light at the end of the tunnel for a while now, yet something always comes up to put us off track. This month, it's a *mandatory* trip to Florida for a cousin's bat mitzvah. It's putting us back about 2K (hotel, flights, rental car, food, gift and clothes - because there's a "theme" and I don't own anything "hollywood casual"). All this just days before xmas, when my parents will be in town visiting. That will also put us back quite a bit to host xmas. Once we get through this, something else will come up, no doubt. :::sigh:::
Anything you can achieve through hard work, you could also just buy.