Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
my mother!!!!!
my parents moved down from Oregan a few months ago. my mom came down first then my dad. Before the move, my mom had two cats. one had a heart attack before she left and the other my dad (admittedly) abandoned because the cat got loose and my dad was more in a hurry to get to Texas than worried about the cat. based on the route my dad took, the cat would have been miserable sine it was the middle of summer and dad went around California and arizona. yes my mom was infuriated and still is at my dad.
Because of some issues that is a whole other thread post, my SIL kicked my parents out after a month and a half. my parents then came to stay with my husband and me until they found a place of their own after another month and a half. In that month and a half, my mother adopted two cats. Because of the obscenely expensive moving rates the apartment demanded, my mother couldn't take the cats with her so she had us take them in until she could get the pet deposit together. one cat our neighbor took in and because we couldn't get him microchipped beforehand she fought tooth and nail that he was her cat and we needed to stop feeding him. (yeah she has things wrong with her mentally. she kept claiming that the boy cat was a girl.) we let it go because there wasn't anything we could do and kept the other one.
After a month, i called my mom and asked if she was ready to take the remaining cat. without even asking if we could, she decided to have us keep him because she figured he had made friends with our cat and dog and thought that taking him away from that would be cruel. my husband was poed about this but after a huge fight because my mom doesn't listen or care, we have kept the cat.
now my mom wants for Christmas two new cats and my husband and I have decided that it would be best to give her the cat SHE adopted at our place and get her a second cat from the shelter. My husband is furious with my mom and has demanded I talk to her about taking the cat she left with us. how do I do that? my mom isn't very open minded when it comes to her own actions and this might start a fight.
Re: my mother!!!!!
I feel like everyone is overreacting. Its a cat, not a kid or a car sitting in your yard..if it wasn't yours and you don't want it, take it to the spca and tell them you got dumped with it and it needs a new home or post it on craigslist...don't get your mother more cats....she is obviously very capable of getting them herself (Or maybe convincing your dad to) so why get in the middle of it?
Wht is your H so upset? Its not his mom or his cat, he needs to chill, I can understand being frusterated, but why is he sooooo mad that she wants more in her own home? That seems kind of out of line no matter how 'bad of an idea' it might be...your mother can make her own decisions about her own life and own home, they have nothing to do with your H (unless you guys decide to get her the new cats).
don't get her a new cat, and get rid of the cat she left if you don't want it. its not that complicated really.
My Blog:Through My Eyes
It's not complicated, but I imagine OP feels guilty if she were to take the cat to the SPCA....it's not the poor cat's fault that her mother is irresponsible when it comes to animal adoption. Either way, I would definitely not be getting the mother another cat...she has proven incapable of caring for one and is behaving very irresponsibly by just adopting then dumping the responsibility on others...
I think your husband has every right to be upset. Mine sure would and I would even be upset with my mother.
I believe that when you get married, that your husband and you all's household is your #1 priority. (The love for your mother never changes of course) In saying that, if you and your husband don't want the cat, then give the cat to your mother and if she doesn't want it, then take it to the shelter. Why have your husband upset? Seems like a easy fix.
Good luck.
TTC since September 2012
Poor kitty! Maybe "just a cat" for a lot of other people but I can't stand when people adopt an animal without considering the long-term care. If you don't think it's a real obligation, like children or leasing a car, then for the love of God - DO NOT get an animal, as you are clearly not ready to commit to the care of it for the next 10 to 15 years!
With that said, I think it is time for a pow-wow with Mom. If it leads to an argument, perhaps it's one that needs to be had. I don't think it's OK to adopt not one, but TWO animals when your living situation is transitory and you're not even considering whether or not you can afford a pet deposit. Then to up and leave them, forcing you to be responsible for their care? Not OK. If she's not ready to assume responsibility once and for all then perhaps look into re-homing kitty permanently. And please, please.... DO NOT GET HER ANYMORE ANIMALS!