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handling a sticky situation
so next friday is my high school 10 year reunion. I can't believe how fast the years have flown and how much people's lives have changed. Many are married, with a child or children and many are coming in from out of state. One person, has changed a lot. In fact, a girl I used to know moderately well in high school had gender reassignment surgery and is on hormone replacements. She is now a He. I don't know about this personally, only from what I have seen on facebook. So I mean, he is pretty public about his transition from woman to man.
I would be happy if he would come, and he posted something on fb about not knowing whether or not he should attend since he has "most literally" changed since high school.
I am the one orgnaizing it and greeting everyone and checking them in. Since I saw it on fb and its pretty public, I assume he knows I know. But how should I address him? Some people surely don't know that are attending. Do I just say "hi John!" and never acknowledge it, or acknowledge him under the name I knew him in high school...but that doesn't seem rright either. It's just I haven't seen him in 10 years and now I feel faced with this whole "everything is public on facebook"....and feel like I can't pretend I dont know who he is and be liek "name please?"
Re: handling a sticky situation
This is true. and the more I think about it I am just going to be liek "hey john" it is just an awkward thing when you find out hte information via facebook rather than from someone...it almost feels like you are spying into their lives. Like, asking someone about their wedding that you didn't know about or weren't invited since you don't know them well to but saw photos of on facebook. Or asking about their new child.
I guess its all the same, you woulnd't NOT ask someone about the new home they purchased, or wedding, or child-- if you saw it on facebook, so why not call someone by their new identity.
Hah, this is so funny to me - a classmate of mine did the same thing. I'd think we went to the same high school, except my 10 year reunion isn't until next year!
Are any of your friends friends with him on Facebook? That would make it really easy so you can say you heard it from so-and-so-mutual-friend and just call him by his new name. But even if he didn't, I'm assuming he registered under his new name, right? If so, that's what I'd call him. It would be more awkward to call him Jane when he clearly looks like a "he" now. And chances are he won't ask how you heard about it anyway, and will just be happy to be treated like nothing changed.
I haven't seen the list yet, but I am under the assumption he registerd under his name now... which is actually just the same as his name when he was a she with two letters dropped, it's an easy transition.
I am just hoping that everyone (those who knew and who didn't) can be friendly and welcoming to everyone else no matter what their current situation is and we don't have to relive our catty highschool days and can just relax and have fun!!
It's tough to get together a crowd of random people who weren't exactly all friends and try to catch up and hang out, especially now. At the 5 year basically all everyone did was get drunk and get inappropiate- so the lines were pretty blurry. Now, I feel like people are in a different place in their life, so it will be interesting to talk to everyone and catch up but there is always some awkwardness!