Family Matters
cutiepie0104
member
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Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Living away from family
Have any of you lived away from family?
Growing up I was very close to my family. My Husband and I moved about 1000 miles away from our hometown(s), for work. Within the move I left my car behind so we are sharing a vehicle. Needless to say I am Lonely and bored.
I there anything you have found inspiring being away from home?
We are renting in a small town with no real Job opportunities, and now that it is getting cooler I'm running out of things to do around the house inside and outside.
I used to be a workaholic and had to leave my job for the move. Being a new at home wife Im not sure where to start.
Any stay at home wife ideas out there?
Just looking for inspiration and maybe an online friend. thanks for reading.
Re: Living away from family
I would suggest volunteering. Maybe your nearby hospital on senior center. Also, if you are religious try out a few churches and find one you like. Church is a great way to make friends. If you have any hobbies that you love, such as knitting, reading, etc. Ask around if there are any groups in your area. Check with the library about reading groups, etc.
Stay busy it will fight off the boredom and get out of the house, that is the way to make new friends. Good luck!
"Don't marry a man unless you would be PROUD to have a son exactly like him." ~ Unknown
Why did you leave your car behind? Can you go and get it with a fun road trip?
Do you have to live in the town you do? Is there a more interesting city within commuting distance?
I am surprised that your husband found such a great job (that allows you not to work) in a town that is so small.
Can you telecommute to a job similar to the one you had?
We left my car behind because we didn't think it would make the trip. With moving we are trying to save up a good amount of money to move back home, then get me a car.
My husband is a Wind Turbine Technician and the sites are usually in the middle of nowhere. We have found other towns that have more opportunities but want to save money. Ive applied for a job at a local Gas station but it was for a second shift job 5 days a week.
We had about two weeks to pack up our lives and find a home 1000 miles away. We found the home we are in now by chance, there weren't a lot available. It's definitely has been a unique experience.
I'm not a SAHW so I'm no help there but agree with the other ladies.
As far as being away from home, MH and I live 4,200 miles from our hometown and respective parents. What I can say is that that's not home anymore; the one I have and share with my H is my home and he is my family. I think it would help if you focused on that while looking for constructive ways to fill your time.
Start with a hobby of yours and see if it's possible to pursue it where you are. That's bound to bring you closer to other people and potential friends. Good luck!
Now that I live far away (i'm pretty much the only one who moved out of that town) some of them think i'm weird, but its SO much better for me. I can go back home and visit, then leave and live my life without feeling stifled. Its now been 9 years since I moved away. The first year or two I had a rough time occasionally feeling like I was left out or missing out on my friends gatherings, and not seeing the people I grew up with and saw every day. but it was a necessary step for me to grow up and learn to take care of myself.
book clubs, cooking classes, volunteering, part time job, local high school classes for whatever-language, yoga etc..
you can drive your DH to work and then have the car for the day and then pick him up assuming he's at his office all day. there's no reason you have to just sit around at home. i'd want to blow my brains out if that were me. i'd be bored silly too
also couldn't you take the bus or train or subway or buy yourself a cheap used car just to get around locally?
Sounds like we are in the same boat. My Husband and I were married for about a year and a half before we moved. I spent a majority of my time with my family members. there is a small amount of rivalry but I just ignore it, which sometimes isn't the best, but life's to short to dink around. My grandparents raised me so I feel obligated to be with them and support them as they grow older. I miss them the most, I visited them frequently and helped my Grandmother clean her home, take her grocery shopping or even to the mall. She is my best friend and it's been hard to leave her.
I did feel stunted in the small town we were in, and I know my husband hated his job. But I enjoyed the homey feel of knowing everyone, but also used that as a crutch to not leave. Im glad we moved and are growing together but I miss my family very much.
Thanks for the insight.
My Blog:Through My Eyes
I have not experienced this personally, but I have had a few friends who have.
One friend moved from the east coast to Chicago for her husband's job. They knew that his position would last only 2 years. She made the best of it, but she didn't really reach out to make new friends because she knew she'd be moving back. Instead, she and her H devoted themselves to sightseeing and making as many road trips to things in and around Chicago as they could. She is a physical therapist who had worked in pediatrics at home. In Chicago, she took a position in a nursing home for a change of pace and to add to her resume.
Another friend moved about 400 miles away to the Research Triangle area of NC, in a move that she knew would be long term. She had a work-from-home job when she moved, and she buried herself in work for the first six months. Then it dawned on her how burnt-out and miserable she was, sitting inside her house working all day. She knew something had to change. She and her H joined a church and became youth group leaders. She joined a running club. They made a concerted effort to get together with people from his job and with people they met in the neighborhood. Now, 5 years later, they have a large group of friends and are very happy.
The third friend moved from New England to the DC area to be with her boyfriend. She also had a work-from-home job, and she felt isolated and lonely at first. Her hobby was knitting, so she got a job in a yarn store. That way she met other knitters and got discounts on knitting supplies! Some of her best friends today are ones she's made through knitting groups.