Relationships
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Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
newly wed wife of a firefighter
I have been married since June 23rd of 2012, my husband just before christmas, got accepted onto the volunteer firefighter department in our town and i am just wondering if there are any wives/girlfriends etc that have the same situation, i have a good friend who's husband has been on it about a year now and she says its a "lonely life" but i think it is because their scheduale is very different from ours, they work opposite hours of eachother whereas my hubby and i work same hours... Any advice would be appreciated. ups or downs etc.
Thanks a bunch!
Re: newly wed wife of a firefighter
Take up a hobby or indulge in one. Volunteer, go to the gym, sign up for a class -- whatever you are interested in, do it.:)
I am also a wife of a firefighter, and I won't sugarcoat this one for you: Sometimes it can be tough. The hours are inconsistent because they only go in when there is a problem. Sometimes that means holidays, birthdays, middle of dinner, date night... they might all be interrupted by the fire company.
HOWEVER.
Volunteer firefighters are not required to go to every call. I suggest sitting down with your husband and talking about some of the situations in which the pager goes off and it's just the two of you. It could be a specific event, or a night of the week that is just yours. That way, the fire company doesn't cut into important time together.
ALSO...
Keep in mind that your husband does one of the coolest, most heroic things ever. Try to get involved in the fire company so you are showing support and getting to know the fire family. It is a great community, and I feel blessed to be a part of it.
Be proud, while also protecting your new marriage.
Congratulations:)
thanks for your advice! i am taking all of it into thought and it is helping me alot...he has not gone to his first fire call yet (he just started) so he has training to go to, im trying to learn as much as i can about the department and training so i am more confidant when he goes out, that he will return back, i dont think they will send him very far without proper training first. it is very helpful knowing i am not alone
Hello from another (very proud) fire wife! My DH is a volunteer also, and is extremely dedicated to it. We were also married in Sept 2012 and had pics taken of us with the engines, and some of him with his helmet on. Yep, he's THAT dedicated.
I agree with the PP who said it can be downright rough. Sometimes, its almost like being a military wife. One thing you do have to accept is there is always the chance he will not come home. Also, he will see and experience things that may mess him up for life. Be ready to be an emotional and sometimes physical support for him, because it sure isn't easy. When it comes to fire calls, accept the fact that plans will get cancelled because of them. We have been very late to things or even cancelled on friends because DH had a serious fire call. He will learn, over time, that some calls are (for lack of a better term) BS and he may not have to bother responding.
Some things that do happen to some FF's, but not all, include: using the hall as a getaway from life, drinking with the guys, a complete renovation of friend-groups, and a sudden flooding of your social schedule with parades, boot drives, and other events. Know when a little is ok, and too much is just that. Also, be prepared for FF funerals. Saddest. things. EVER.
Firefighting is a brotherhood. Fire wives are a sisterhood. If you ever need advice, feel free to msg me.