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Housewarming Party Questions and Dilemmas
Hey everyone, so I guess I need some expert advice and what better place to turn to?! So after two months I think we are finally ready to hold our housewarming party. But I have a few questions and I am just all around confused about what to do since I have never been to one and clearly have never had one myself!
How far in advance do I need to let people know? We were planning on February 23rd (last Saturday) and I wanted to send out invites this week, is that enough time? I mean this isn't like my wedding, just informal get together.
My husband works Saturdays until 6:00, and unfortunately he cannot get any time off (he might be able to get out a little early, but doubtful). So I was thinking of almost doing an open house type of thing, starting around 2:00 and going until the last person leaves. That way the people my husband works with and his friends can come later on and family can come during the day to check out the house. Would this work or should I set times?? I really don't want to be feeding a bunch of people dinner.
I really want to keep this as informal as possible and reflect us. So for food I was almost thinking hors d'oeuvres during the day and maybe making a few large pasta dishes (baked ziti, lasagna, baked spaghetti) and a few pizzas closer to dinner and wash it down with beer and mixed drinks. Would this be acceptable??
Now for my final dilemma, and I really hope I don't get ripped apart for this. I know it is not acceptable to ask for gifts of any sort (which is fine, we got most of our things four years ago during our wedding shower) but we both dislike wine, and dislike is going easy. I know wine is one of those gifts you give for a housewarming and I really just don't want anyone to bring any for us because it would just go to waste. Is there anyway to tell people this without coming across as gift hungry? I am pretty sure our friends know better, but our families are another story.
Any help would be really appreciated as I am at a loss as what to do. I really do not know what is acceptable in a situation like this. Thanks a head of time! 
Re: Housewarming Party Questions and Dilemmas
Two to three weeks is plenty of time. I really think it's odd to have it on a day that your husband can't be there. There's no way I'd want to have a party from 2 pm to sometime after 8. I don't know your husband, but mine would HATE to walk through the door to a house full of people. I would seriously consider finding a different day.
If you are set on that date I would move it to 7 pm and adjust the menu to that. Either a full dinner or heavy apps would be fine. Just be sure to list it on the invite.
As for the wine- there is no polite way to address it before hand. I would hope that people you invited would know you well enough to know you don't care for wine. If you get some, smile and thank them. Then either open the wine for the party or put it back for the future. There will be times you want wine for a party or to give to someone else as a gift.
It's in my experience that wording your invitation correctly can go along way. Having a house registry isn't a bad idea (crate and barrel/ IKEA) has a lot of nice items that are inexpensive. You don't have to pick a $400.00 pot. You can tick off hand towels, salad bowl etc. That way you eliminate the option of your guest bringing wine.
paperless post is a classy online invitations (Loves this site) http://www.paperlesspost.com/ I used them recently for an event.
I think the problem is my husband works funky hours and his days off are Wednesdays and Thursdays, and I've planned parties for those days before with little success. It doesn't matter to me because I work midnight shifts so I can either take the night off or still go into work if I can't get it off. He was the one that suggested starting it early when he wasn't there, that way family could show up and do a walk through and say hi and not have to come by at 8pm when he would be out of work. We know our friends don't mind coming by later, but family sometimes don't like being out too late.
This is a good idea. My mom was the one who suggested 2pm...but maybe 4pm start w/5pm for apps and 7ish for dinner-type items. Thanks!
I generally like to send out invites 3-4 weeks prior (so now for you). I know the guideline is 2-3 weeks, but everybody I know has plans at least that far out, so I do it a little earlier.
Open house: good. Open house for 6 hours: very, very bad. I find it very tiring to be "on" for 6 hours, keeping food refreshed, making small talk, staying perky. Logistically, having enough food and enough appropriate food is a big headache.
I think a couple hours, 4-7 or 6-8 of heavy hors d'oeuvres, drinks, and desserts would be good. That way your husband can be around for much of it. And that way you can make one class of food and not have to worry about cooking full meals and doing casual vs. fancy things.
I personally don't serve pasta when I entertain. One, because I don't have enough seating for everyone, so I serve mainly apps, and two, because I have white upholstery and I would strangle someone if they got marinara on my chairs. I think ziti, spaghetti, et al, need a table and chairs and knife and fork. That doesn't say party to me, that says restaurant. Italian apps like bruschetta and caprese skewers are a good way to get that feel without the mess.
As for wine, just smile and be gracious. There's nothing else to do. Don't say a word about gifts of any kind in advance. If you do get wine and want to regift it, put a sticky note on it when you put it in the cabinet so that if you regift it, you don't regift it to them. When they come over next, serve it to them since they like it. I don't drink red wine (does very strange things to me - makes the room start spinning and I feel faint), so when I get it, I just put it up in the cupboard and get it down the next time I have a party.
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Please don't mention gifts or build a registry for your housewarming. Accept any token graciously, and save it for another event or whatever.
Depending on your guest count, I would advise against a dinner in favor of heavy and light apps that can be replenished and/or sit out throughout the day. We recently had our housewarming and welcomed about 50 guests. I never stopped moving for 4+ house, but had to have limited interaction with the food due to planning. Also, keep in mind you'll want low mess foods. If there are a lot of people snacking, they won't all have places to sit, and you don't want someone standing on your carpet eating pasta and red sauce, or at least I wouldn't.
Please don't make a registry for your housewarming.
If someone brings you wine, thank them and open it for the party or save it for another party.
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I agree. If I were to receive an invite to a housewarming that included a registry, I'd skip the party on principle. Any housewarming party I've been to, people bring token hostess gifts, likes wine, or a small plant. It's not like it's a shower.
I definitely wasn't planning on adding anything about a registry on the invitation. I understand the point of this isn't to get gifts, it is to invite people to my new home and show it off! I was just wondering if there was a way to inform people not to bring wine, which I did not think tactfully could be done.
Thanks everyone so far for all the ideas. I was not concerned about pasta sauces all over the place because I have wood floors throughout and leather furniture, so it isn't something that I couldn't just do a quick wipe-down. But I didn't take into consideration that there probably won't be enough sitting room for everyone to eat this at the same time, so keeping it simple and finger foods make more sense.
I put out small bites:
Bowls of snacks: goldfish crackers and nuts
Artichoke Dip & Pita Chips
Hummus and Veggies
Cheese, Sausage, & Crackers
Pigs in a blanket with "fancy" chicken sausage (Make and bake ahead, freeze, thaw, and bake when ready to serve)
Meatballs in a Whiskey Glaze kept warm in a crockpot/fondue
Cookies
Brownie Bites
I made a signature cocktail, apple cider margaritas in the fall, as well as having out beer, wine, and soda.
I would start the party at 5, I think your husband will make it home before most guests arrive...I honestly don't having the party go on for several hours with out him is the way to go.
Housewarmings don't have to be all day or even during the day
This will also allow you to serve one meal...Italian is a good way to go, a few trays of ziti (put out one at a time)...a crockpot of meatballs, huge salad with dressing on side, bread/rolls, veggie tray (small things of dip so it doesn't sit out for hours), cheese/crackers, and some desserts
Don't mention gifts, if people know you, you they won't bring it anyways...if someone brings it, open it up and serve immediately (borrow a wine opener in advance if you don't have one), you can throw out what you don't use or reserve for cooking
If you are hosting around the dinner hours, you need to serve dinner. People will remember if you only served appetizers, and left hungry. Meal time calls for a meal. And, grown ups can balance a heavy duty (ex Chinette) plate with a meal on it. Appetizers should be around for grazing purposes only.
I agree with vjcjenn1's advice. Have fun, and good luck!