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frustrated with future in-law- vent
Just need to vent to some place where i know someone will listen. I love my future sister-in-law. She is a wonderful, sweet, kind and giving woman. I couldn't ask for a better bride for my big brother. But her mom is about to drive me out of my tree with the planning details for the wedding and shower.
My future SIL doesn't have a whole lot of strong feelings for the details of the event. The only part she cares deeply about is that she will be married to my brother at the end of the day. My SIL's mom has taken over everything, which is ok by SIL. Fine. I offered to help in any way i can because i love my big bro and his bride. I am (yay!!) doing the flowers for the wedding and reception. (her mom has taken back some of what i offered to do to have it done by a professional. i'm ok with this given all of the other issues going on.) I offered my SIL's mom in November that if she needed anything for the shower to let me know.
The shower is now in less than 2 weeks. I found out today i am supposed to be doing the centerpieces for the shower. No idea as to how many tables, no info other than "same colors as the wedding, but not the same centerpieces" and that she will be sending a vase over to me on Sunday via my SIL.
So now, two days after valentines day, i have to produce an unknown quantity of flowers with only 1 vase given to me ahead of time. i want to scream. Instead, i am now going to try to wring some sense out of her via email. *sigh* Thank you for letting me vent.
Re: frustrated with future in-law- vent
Baby Boy loved for 15 weeks, 5/31/11
Baby Girl loved for 16.5 weeks. 3/1/12
I don't know why you are so involved in this wedding, do you not have any other activities or interests of your own to keep yourself occupied?
As for the centerpieces, why don't you call someone so you DO have all the information? Throwing in the part about finding flowers a few days after Valentine's Day seems a tad dramatic.
Flowers around VD are a challenge. That's probably why she'd turfed them to you.
I'd find something else to do in the way of centerpieces- perhaps something related to a shared hobby, their HM destination or even childhood memories.
rude much?
she's close to her brother and is helping plan and work on his wedding. is there something wrong with that? my sisters are my best friends, and i planned and did much of the work for both of their weddings. do you not have a family?
Getting over-involved to the point where you are stressed out and can't take a step back isn't worth it to me. That's merely what I was pointing out. I don't see anything wrong with helping family out, but that in no way means they get to step all over you and make demands that you may not be able to meet.
You should have said what you meant. "Don't you have other things to keep you occupied" does not = "its not worth it if it stresses you out this much"
this exactly.
and I would just have a chat with your brother to let him know you want to help but aren't able to because of x,y and z. Mother in law isn't a good at communicating with you in a timely manner, this is causing you undue stress and that's not healthy. He'll understand. His Mother in law asks for anything else just say no. Or give clear written guidelines on what you can do via email.