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Newlyweds... roommates??
My husband and I are newlyweds and he wants us to consider having roommates. This couple are boyfriend/girlfriend and they've been dating for about 3ish years and they've broken up once, which I personally think made their relationship stronger, we habe known them for about 2 1/2 years, the boyfriend was one of our roommates (before we were married) best buds and he eventually moved in with us also, so we've already lived with the boyfriend. I like thr fact that rent would be cheaper considerig were struggling right now so could use a break, I also like that we'd all be together and can do things together. But we also already all go to the same gym and work-out together everyday. We all get along really well and haven't had any problems. We all also range from ages 21-23
The other part of me that makes me not want to live with them is I love our privacy and I don't want this situation to ruin our friendship because this is really the only couple that we hang out with.
Please give me your thoughts and opinions, I'm so torn.
Re: Newlyweds... roommates??
And it sounds like you kind of expect to be each others social lives.
Just be careful. I think you'll all need your space/ couple time.
I really feel like moving in w/ people you don't know well vs moving in w/ friends is better. I've seen MANY friendships ruined once the people lived together. Living w/ someone is entirely different than being good friends.
~Benjamin Franklin
DS dx with celiac disease 5/28/10
TTC since September 2012
Baby Boy loved for 15 weeks, 5/31/11
Baby Girl loved for 16.5 weeks. 3/1/12
So, from that perspective, I would not do this.
Yes, the $$ would be nice. But I just feel like you're both approaching this from a "weee!!! It would be so fun to have our best buddies around all the time!" and not really looking at the REALITY of what being w/ these people all the time will actually mean.
And I agree- having A roommate (one person) is very different than living w/ another couple.
~Benjamin Franklin
DS dx with celiac disease 5/28/10
How long would you all be living together? A year lease?
It would probably work fine for a few months!
I couldn't imagine living with another couple under the same roof. It would be hard to have privacy. Have you talked to your H about how you both think it would work out? Does H have any concerns?
I think that living with friends is NOT going to help him grow up... It is only going to make him feel more like a bachelor living with his buddies. I have friends who got married and have his friends as room mates because they are trying to save up for a house, and they constantly have people over, never any real privacy. In order to get privacy at all they have to hide out in their room. They haven't had a chance to enjoy eachother as newlyweds and are still kind of stuck in the college party scene. I personally would not suggest living with anyone else, but that's jus tme... Good luck!
A very good question.
Oh trust me I am concerned, were taking baby steps. Hes gotten better over thr last 4 years, I'm not trying to make an excuse for him, but I think his problem is/was that he had to grow up fast and had a lot of family problems and I was one of his only serious relationships. So I'm not sure, he is only 23 and my dad always tells me it will take a while for him to "grow up". I love him for the way he is as for he loves me the way I am, so we just take it day by day.
I have been thinking more about this and I've been leaning way more to saying NO to roommates because I agree with all of you, I guess I just wanted some more opinions to make sure that my decision wasn't a selfish act.
I'm glad you're leaning toward no.
I am more antisocial than most people, so obviously I would never do this!
It sounds like you and your H are more sociable than I am, but still I think you would regret this. If you do not move in together, I think you'll be able to fully enjoy and appreciate your friends, whereas if you become roommates I think it is inevitable that you guys will get on each others nerves at times and it could even end the friendship, at worst.
I feel like you will be able to enjoy more aspects of your H if you and he do not live with others, and have more fun with your friends if you do not live with them.