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Don't understand what's going on at work
I keep getting sent home early for various reasons by my boss....it's slow, he's got it under control etc. We are both on salary, he's the manager and I am the assistant manager. Many if not all days he arrives before me and leaves after me. Granted I have 2 kids and a busy life outside work (he does not have kids, been married a year) but allot myself 9 hours per work day to be at work.
The weird part is, this JUST started happening in the last 2 months. We were also good friends before, had fun at work and would share about our lives to one another and the atmosphere at work was light. We work hard but we enjoyed working with each other. Now work is so heavy and not at all enjoyable.
I have no idea what changed but it's like he does not like me anymore and does not want to be around me. I always offer to cover and he won't let me. I have given up basically and just defer to him and go home when he tells me too.
The problem is I feel guilty about the unbalance of our hours. The other thing is that I don't know why he is so cold to me now. It's like night and day. I get worried that he's making me look disposable and I will get laid off. I've tried asking him what's wrong but to no avail. I want to be productive and to be of service but he's not giving me the opportunity. I can't argue with him when he calls me off work.
What should I do? Send him an email telling him how I feel? My husband thinks I should go to HR but I don't want to make him even more angry or cause waves.
The best way to describe him right now us passive aggressive. It's just very uncomfortable because there is such an obvious change in our relationship as co-workers and no longer being friendly.
Im so confused! Any advice would be greatly appreciated.
Re: Don't understand what's going on at work
Well, whatever you decide to do....sending an email on the matter is the WORST idea possible!!!
If you have a conversation it needs ot be face-to-face since that's professional and there's no paper trail.
Do you think he thinks you two got too close? Maybe the wife is bothered by it? When you are there -are you there alone or are the others staying late and coming in early? Is there ANYTHING in your professional relationship that could be miscontrued by others observing you is unprofessional or out of line?
This conversation needs to be about defining your hours, NOT about your relationship - that will just make him act weirder.
Ok. No email. I've been thinking of just talking to him. Sometimes it's just us, sometimes others are around, just depends how busy it is. For the record, he IS a workaholic....working 6 days sometimes 7 days a week....10-12 hours a day. I can't and I don't want to compete with that. I just want to feel good about putting in my fair share. And I want to enjoy my job, which I used to.....no do much right now.
Thanks for the advice.
Why not say something like, "I want to be sure I am pulling my weight around here. What do you think about me coming in at ___ and leaving around ___ ? If not, what do you have in mind?"
Use and open-ended question, forcing him to answer you with more than a yes or no.
Perhaps if you define and set the expectations with him, he won't send you home early and you will know where you stand.
Edited to add: Additionally, not to freak you out, but if you do think he may be trying to phase you out, it might be a good idea to have your resume ready and a job search started, just in case.