what do you call your in laws?

burybuck0489 · March 2013

I don't know if this is the right place, but my husband and i have been married almost a year, and im still not sure what to call his mom and dad? i usually use their first names, and no one has ever said anything...and his mom has always used her first name if shes calling, but last week she called and said "hi sweety its Mama calling, Dad and i are gonna stop by and grab the papers" and now im like... is that what they want us to start calling them? Coming from a broken family, using Mom and Dad is something i will work on, but i was wondering what other people use?

EastCoastBride · March 2013

I use their first names. Honestly, until they SAY "call us mom and dad", I'd stick to first names. Or ask them. But at the same time, what are YOU comfortable with? Even if my IL's ever said "call us mom and dad", I wouldn't. I don't' feel that close to them and they aren't MY mom and dad.

burybuck0489 · March 2013

Yeah i call my IL's by their first names, unless im jokingly greeting them then i say "hey mama" or "hey pops" and they usually smile and i get a hug lol i just was curious to see what everyone was comfortable doing,

WendyGR · March 2013

first names. Although if I'm writing a card from both of us I'll address it to "mom" or "dad."

doglove · March 2013

I also call them by their first names.

burybuck0489 · March 2013

thanks Ladies,

ALSO, doglove, your display picture is beautiful!

brij2006 · March 2013

I use their first names. MIL is the only one who has made any comment on this, but she will say that I'm the daughter she never had (all boys). But I've still never called her mom.

Both of our parents told the opposite person, "welcome to the family daughter/son" on our wedding day. But my brother does call H "bro," and H's brother calls me "sis."

kipnus · March 2013

We both use first names with our in laws.

tiffanysbride · March 2013

I use frist names, they are not my parents. They have told me I can call them mom and dad, but I don't. It isn't a personal thing, I like them both but again they aren't my parents. I would not do something to make other people happy, stick with what you're doing.

flounder31 · March 2013

First names are fine. As for the message, they probably intended that to be for you husband and accidentally called you? Just a guess.

Greco1014 · March 2013

WendyGR:
first names. Although if I'm writing a card from both of us I'll address it to "mom" or "dad."

This.

I think it's a generational thing...my parents called their in-laws mom and dad, and they're always saying that it would have been considered rude to use first names back then. Nowadays, though, almost everyone that I know calls their in-laws by their first names.

BulgariHeart · March 2013

I also call them by their first names.

jessica290 · March 2013

burybuck0489:
Yeah i call my IL's by their first names, unless im jokingly greeting them then i say "hey mama" or "hey pops" and they usually smile and i get a hug lol i just was curious to see what everyone was comfortable doing,

this is what I do as we'll. h calls my parents mom and dad because they are more of parents to him than his own parents, but they aren't bad people.

srgw · March 2013

EastCoastBride:
I use their first names. Honestly, until they SAY "call us mom and dad", I'd stick to first names. Or ask them. But at the same time, what are YOU comfortable with? Even if my IL's ever said "call us mom and dad", I wouldn't. I don't' feel that close to them and they aren't MY mom and dad.

All of this.

I call my ILs by their first names. My H calls my parents by their first names.

Mustard76 · March 2013

Another one for first names here. I called them by their first names for the 4 years DH were together before getting married, it would be weird to me to switch to Mom and Dad after that.

annmarie714 · March 2013

I call the ILs by their first names.

I call H's brother by his first name but will call him "brother" in texts or when we're all out having fun and being goofy. He calls me "sis" most of the time.

I don't have this relationship with my sister's H (my other BIL) but I think age plays a factor. H's brother is 11 years older than me and my sister's H is only 3 years older than me.

CowgirlK39 · March 2013

I call my ILs mama and dad. They started calling themselves that, and I felt weird but I actually asked SIL if it was okay with her that I called them that. I don't know why I just seemed more respectful to ask. My H calls my mom mom, but he calls my dad by his first name. My mother is VERY upset with my brothers FI because she doesn't not call them anything. When they are in town she greet them with "hey, you!" This drives my mother nuts.

MrsHennyBee · March 2013

Now I call them by their first names, but when DH and I first started dating, I went out of my way not to call them anything. It felt so awkward in the beginning, and even now saying their names feels a little awkward - I really have no idea why. I would never call them "mom" or "dad" it would feel way too forced. I'm looking forward to when we have kids and I can just call them grandma and grandpa last name lol!

TxCrazyMom · March 2013

I call my MIL by her first name (no FIL), but would not have an issue with "Mom" if we were close.

My parents have used mom and dad for their in-laws, but everyone was (and still is) really close.

Just stick to what you are comfortable with.

kvs11412 · March 2013

I call his mom "Mom" sometimes and by her name other times, but his father has always just been his name. I lost my mother when I was young so I suppose it's easier for me to call MIL mom.

talandree · March 2013

I call my in-laws by their first names. I would never call them mom and dad because I'm not exactly close to them and I already have my own parents.

Mrsbuttercup0806 · March 2013

First names.

romarie3 · March 2013

I call my MIL, Mom2. She sent me and email and signed Mom2 several times before I actually called her that. This makes me and her both happy. We both like it and it doesnt replace my actual mother. I call my FIL by his first name.

what do you call your in laws?

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