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Husband's abusive father
My husband's father is a horrible human being in every respect. I used to think when people are bad people it's because they had a bad childhood or have an addiction or something, but he's just bad for no reason. I have personally witnessed him inflict pain onmy husband for no reason other than it's fun of him on several occasions. From what I understand it used to happen a lot more when he was you ger. I don't know the details because my husband doesn't like talking about it.
In September FIL was arrested for possession of child pornography. He has pled guilty and is awaiting sentencing. He's home on bail and the police took his computer, which is how he spent most of his time before. Unfortunately that means he's harder to avoid when we go their to visit H's mother and brothers. So far, the only thing he's said to H is complaints. Yesterday H's brother who stll lives with his parents was telling us H should give their father a chance because he's changed. H flat-out refused. I couldn't even believe his brother would suggest it. He said their father's been more social, but I think that's just because he doesn't have his internet friends to entertain him. He also said he's been more considerate, but the things he decsribed are things you wouldn't think twice about if a normal person did it. If you were in this situation, would you give your parent a chance? He has never acted like a father so I don't conser that a reason to give him a chance. What do you think?
Re: Husband's abusive father
No. This is toxic and I would not want FIL to think he would have a relationship with any future children.
Did he sexually abuse your H and his brothers?
No. He clearly hasn't turned into a positive person to be around.
I would stay away from their house at least until he gets his sentence, too. Your H should be firm with family who says to give him a chance in explaining that he will not, and tha
"You know you're in love when you don't want to fall asleep because reality is finally better than your dreams." - Dr. SeussA guy who is about to be sentenced for child porn charges is not a reformed person. Even without the abuse, he should be treated like a leper in most cases, IMO.
H's brother is probably just reveling in the "good" part of the abusive cycle
Dear God, no.
How is this even a question ?
Please please talk to your husband about seeing a counselor. I have been beofre and I think it was one of the healthiest decisions I ever made.
Thank you, everyone! It's good to know it's not just us being stubborn/closed-minded.
MLE2010, they were not sexually abused. Mostly FIL hit them and also neglected them, e.g. not turning any heat o