Married Life
marriedlady25
member
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Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
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Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Husband/IL time
in Married Life
Just out of curiosity, how much time does your husband spend with his father/brother/seeing his parents? Including visits, helping with a project, etc. How often do you both see his family, and your family in comparison?
Re: Husband/IL time
"You know you're in love when you don't want to fall asleep because reality is finally better than your dreams." - Dr. SeussEh maybe a day every few months? Not a lot. They live a couple of hours away and then work during the week and DH works weekends.
I see my mom weekly. The rest of my family every few months.
ILs live about 45 minutes away. DH sees them about once every 3 weeks or so.
We live about 10 mins from my parents. We see them a couple times a week which is partially due to the fact that they watch our son a couple times.
~Benjamin Franklin
DS dx with celiac disease 5/28/10
Both sets of parents live out of state.
My parents call me every few days, and I or DH talk to them for like 5-10min. He calls his parents every, two weeks? And has hour-long convos.
ILs live a mile from our house, and my parents live 20 minutes away. We see each set of parents probably 2 times a week. Some weeks are more, and some weeks are less. It all depends on what projects each of us have going on. I also work near my parents' house, so I will occasionally stop by and visit with my mom or go shopping with her after work.
Neither one of us find this too much. We both love our parents and IL's, and are very happy to be this close to them.
TTC since 1/13 DX:PCOS 5/13 (long, anovulatory cycles)
Clomid 50mg 9/13 = BFP! EDD 6/7/14 M/C 5w6d Found 11/4/13
1/14 PCOS / Gluten Free Diet to hopefully regulate my system.
Chemical Pregnancy 03/14
Surprise BFP 6/14, Beta #1: 126 Beta #2: 340 Stick baby, stick! EDD 2/17/15
Riley Elaine born 2/16/15
TTC 2.0 6/15
Chemical Pregnancy 9/15
Chemical Pregnancy 6/16
BFP 9/16 EDD 6/3/17
Beta #1: 145 Beta #2: 376 Beta #3: 2,225 Beta #4: 4,548
www.5yearstonever.blogspot.com
We live about an hour from DH's parents and maybe 15 mins from mine. We see his parents together maybe once every 6 weeks? Mostly holidays or birthdays. The occasional informal get together. He sees them alone maybe once a month? Stuff like him taking the car to his dads shop. He will call them every few days, maybe twice a week. Not long convos.
I freely admit we see my parents way more often, probably once a week or so, and I talk to my mom almost every day. Usually on the way home from work.
My IL's live 10ft away and we also farm together so I see them about every other day in the winter and daily the rest of the year.
My parents only live 50 minutes away and I see them weekly.
We spend more time with my folks than we do his... mainly because it's a much more enjoyable experience! We see my family on average 1 - 2 times a month. Quick get-togethers, 3-4 hours tops. We don't see his family often, maybe once every 3-4 months. My ILs also go out of town every weekend and since weekends are when most people are available/get together, they tend to miss out on stuff.
My parents live a mile from us. It depends on the week- i could see them a few times during the week or not at all. My one brother is still at home and the other lives about 35 mins away. We see alot of each other but we all get along extremely well.
DH's parents are divorced. He currently is not speaking to his mom and we havent seen or spoke to her since right before Christmas. Both my DH and his father work crazy schedules so we try to get together every couple of months. Both his parents live only about 25 mins away. He also has two brothers who we dont see very often.
My family is a much closer knit than DHs and I know that sometimes DH feels more at home with my own family.
When we were first married, we spent at least two weekends a month visiting both sets of parents and family. Granted, we live an hour away from our families. Truthfully, we have a better arrangement than most. I get along great with my mil and in laws and dh gets along great with mine. If my mom and mil ran into each other, they would stop and chat, if not probably have lunch. There's no family drama on either side, so now that we have ds, who is almost 4, dh doesn't care if I take ds and go visit family, and vice versa.
I recognize that our situation is not like most on here.
Edited to answer the question: We probably now see each family once a month, although I talk to my mom every day. I wish we lived closer and could see them more, but our jobs don't make that possible.
H's brother lives in the States, so we see him and his wife about once a year, but he and H skype almost every day. H's parents live three hours away from us. We were there for Easter, and I was there again for a week for a training course and a swim meet.
My family (parents and youngest bro and sis) is further away (5 hours), but at least a couple of them come every month or two for my youngest brother's soccer tournaments. Also, my other brother lives in the same apartment building as us, so I we hang out at least once a week and I often see him on the bus. My other sister is in the States, so I haven't seen her since Christmas.
How often we see ILs depends on how they are behaving. BILs were coming over weekly to hang out, until we realized they were cleaning out our fridge when they came over. MIL goes through phases where she is okay and not bugging us, and then she will act like a child and cause problems. That's when we go a long time with out talking to any of them. They live two mins up the road from us and tend to show up unannounced, which also gets a negative response from us.
As for my parents, they live about ten mins away, and I have seen them a lot lately bu it's because my dad has been having some issues. My mom calls almost every day, and I go over there at least once a week. DH isn't a huge fan of going over my parents house because they are older and there is nothing to do at their place, while his brothers still live at home so when we go there he goofs around with them.
We actually got into an argument with a "friend" who told us we were too old to be spending time with DHs family so much. People are so rude.
we dont live by any of DH family . I work with my family and we all live in the same town
I see my family daily.( Dh doesnt see them that much..... maybe once every other month)
When we see his family it is anywhere from 3 days to a week, once a year.