Money Matters
NestCayla
admin
Dear Community,
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Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
A friend as a financial adviser
Hey guys, i'm new to this board and hope you don't mind me jumping on!
I'm curious about your opinion... A very good friend of mine that I have known since high school does financial planning and advising as a career. He has offered to help me (not for free though) but I am unsure of taking his help. Here are my thoughts:
- he hasn't even told me how much i will need to spend for his services, I already have a tight budget and don't know if spending money on advice that my father might be able to give me is worth it or not.
- he's a good friend, and I'm not sure if I want a friend to know about my money
- He's a good friend to me, and I know that if I give him my business it would really help him out!
- How much could his help really help me??? I don't know, I have never talked to anyone who has used a financial planner/adviser before
Really appreciate any input!!!
Thanks!
Re: A friend as a financial adviser
We actually use a good friend as our FA. But honestly, I wouldn't necessarily recommend it. I fully, fully, fully trust him and he's been a huge help to us. He's VERY professional, etc.
But he's probably one of few people who I would really trust like this. I have great friends that I love - but I wouldn't hire them to manage my money!
You can't do it to "help him out". You have to do it because you believe he has the skills and the professionalism to manage YOUR money well, and to keep it confidential.
~Benjamin Franklin
DS dx with celiac disease 5/28/10
I don't think personal life and business/financial life should be mixed. There is potential for too many problems.
What happens if you dislike the services or decide to stop using his services for whatever reason?...then, there's always THAT conversation you have to have. It may or may not change your friendship, but still it would be ackward (IMO).
It isn't your job to "help" him out with his business either, as the PP wisely mentioned.
And then I would have concerns about confidentiality. Even the most trusted, discerning professionals have those little innocent comments occasionally pass to their spouses, etc..."well, you know, if we had it as good as..." or "well, I cannot give you details, but we have waaay more money than ____."
I guess personally, I would never want to wonder and if something bad happened, I would never want to be in a spot of ruining a relationship or feeling like I couldn't be honest about my feelings.
Our CPA, which we have gone to for 6 years (and have liked) has been underperforming with a few things this tax season....things like misplacing our entire file (it was "lost" for over 2 weeks and because of this we had to have him file an extension), sending us incomplete forms, etc. We will probably search for someone new for a variety of reasons, but also because his costs have become insanely high. Fortunately, we do not have a relationship outside of this professional one. While the conversation to leave him will be tough, I cannot imagine doing it with someone I know outside of the business relationship.
"I am glad you talked with me about your financial planning services. I'm not sure what I am going to do at this point." Or, if you want to be direct and honest and totally eliminate any future possibility of him asking about it again, you could say, "I'm happy you told me about your financial planning services. I am sure you do a great job with your clients, but personally I would like to not mix our friendship with a business relationship."
I think either response is suitable. Seriously, if he doesn't understand or changes his relationship with you based on your response, then you KNOW you made a good decision for sure. If he is truly professional he will completely understand and be polite about it (even if he is a bit disappointed).