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need thoughts on 2 things
Hi Ladies,
Here's the background- We have 2 weddings in April on the same weekend. Wedding #1 are friends of friends (we don't socialize w/ them on our own, have only met bride twice. Surprised we were even invited). Wedding #2 are good friends of ours from Washington DC. Groom was in our wedding (he met bride after our wedding). Bride I like very much, and we make an effort to see them a few times a year. We cannot attend #1 b/c it's Friday and we have the rehearsal for #2 that night. I was just invited to #1's shower. It's in North Jersey a week after we move. Since I know I can't go to the wedding, do I need to go to shower? Do I send a gift? I really just want to send a gift for the wedding and politely decline shower- thoughts?
Also for wedding #2, shower is in Maryland on a Sunday which is 3 hours from our new house. I really feel like I can just send a gift for this, but DH thinks I should be there in person...I did have out of towners come to mine, but I just think it's a lot on a Sunday, especially to do all by myself. Thoughts??
g 6/20/11 mc @ 5wks
10/19/11 mc @ 17wks- Trisomy 18
IUI #1 4/26/12 BFN
Moving on to IVF in July
37 with DOR...fabulous
ER 7/14/12 6R 5F, ET 7/17 3 embies, beta #1 7/26: 147, beta #2 7/28: 326, beta#3 7/30: 422...ugh, beta#4 7/31: 607...hopeful, beta #5 8/2: 1280, beta #6 8/7: 7184 and u/s shows 1 possibly 2 sacs! 8/14 2 beautiful heartbeats! 9/24 we are TEAM BLUE!!!!!
Re: need thoughts on 2 things
If you don't plan on going to to wedding #1 then i see no reason to go to the shower or even to send a gift for it
I think it is fine to send a gift to shower #2 since it is 3 hours away and on a Sunday...My DH's family live about 3 hours away and non of his family/friends came to our shower (and it was on a Saturday)...A few sent gifts in the mail and i appriciated that...
I totally agree
I agree with PPs.
It is ok to decline going to a shower because of distance, a normal bride understands. I actually had showers in two locations, because I knew the travel would be a bother to some people.
If you feel weird about missing the other shower of the not close friend and not sending anything, you could send a small gift or just a nice card. The bride is getting so many gifts at the shower anyway, that she shouldn't expect extra from people who didn't attend.
I agree with previous posts that you dont need to send anything for wedding #1 shower or the actual wedding. Although a card to let them know you apprecaite the invite is always nice.
As for shower #2 ask the H to drive down with you so you are not doing it alone. If for some reason he wont or cant just decling and send something in the mail.
Ditto everyone else on #1.
I was also going to suggest taking H down with you and making a weekend out of it if you have friends in MD. Otherwise, I think it's fine to just send a gift.
6/20/11 mc @ 5wks
10/19/11 mc @ 17wks- Trisomy 18
IUI #1 4/26/12 BFN
Moving on to IVF in July
37 with DOR...fabulous
ER 7/14/12 6R 5F, ET 7/17 3 embies, beta #1 7/26: 147, beta #2 7/28: 326, beta#3 7/30: 422...ugh, beta#4 7/31: 607...hopeful, beta #5 8/2: 1280, beta #6 8/7: 7184 and u/s shows 1 possibly 2 sacs! 8/14 2 beautiful heartbeats! 9/24 we are TEAM BLUE!!!!!