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family contract help

Ok. I need help writing this contract. My DH's sister is coming to move in with us this weekend. We agreed to have a contract with her, with rules she must follow. I am very worried about this move, and not completly happy with it. I have no idea how to make this contract. I feel kind of stupid even doing it, but I know it must be done. For example, some of the rules we want are she must be working, no sleepover ( people staying here), keep house clean, rent will be 200 a month, etc. I just feel really stupid writing this. I feel like we are treating her like a child.

Re: family contract help

  • I have no idea how to help you but good luck!

    Have you tried google?

  • yea google wasnt much help, it was only for children
  • she is 23. This is the situation.. SHe is in a bad marriage. They got married only because she was pregnant. They moved in with his mother. Her husband has a major gambling problem, so they have no money at all. They pay no bills either by the way, so after living there for 2.5 years you would think they would have money saved. They want to seperate, so she needs a place to stay. She was working at toys r us- just recently quit. She goes out with her friends pretty often, leaves her 2 year old child at home with the mother in law all the time. My Husband feels if we let her stay with us for 6 months-1 year and help guide her to start taking more responsability, we could help change her for the better. I feel she wont change, so that is why I insisted on making a contract for us. Because if she doesnt start making her life better in the next 6 months while living here, she needs to go and at least it will be on paper. This is a really big move. Not only will she be moving in, but her 2 year old as well.
  • that's a really tough situation, especially with also having her 2 year old living with you.

    I don't really know how to help you with the contract, but I would definitley include some "rules" including her child..does she expect you two to watch the child..or is the mother in law going to watch him/her? Maybe have a "curfew?" I know she's 23..but you don't want her coming in the house at 2am..

    Good Luck!

  • Hmm good idea about the curfew. She usually stays out late. No, one of our rules is she must watch her own child. If she wants to go out, she can pay a babysitter, but we arent watching her. The poor child goes to bed at 2am and wakes up like 12pm
  • You need to draft a lease.  Include quiet hours, no house guests, the amount of rent she is paying, when it is due, the late date, the amount of the late fee and what form the rent should be paid in (personal check, cash, or money order.  Make sure you give her a receipt for each month's payment).  Mention where she is to park her car.  Any contributions to the food or utility bills.  I'd also make a clause that states she is to provide food, clothes and toiletries for the baby.  (You don't want to be buying diapers.)  Put a clause in there that failure to follow these rules will result in the landlord (you) giving her two weeks notice that the lease is cancelled and she is "evicted".

    You're a braver person than I would am.  There would be no way in hell my SILs or BIL would be moving in with us.  I don't think I'd let my own family move in with us.  Good luck!

    Keep us updated!

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  • Just curious why did you agree to it if you are so uncomfortable?

    ?

    Also, I understand why you want to make rules but if she is paying rent I am not sure some of them will be fair. JMO?

  • I guess deep down I feel bad and I do want to help her. She said her Husband is abusing her ( emotionally/controlling). I want her baby to be safe, and in a better enviorment. At first I said no, but than I took a few months to really think about it.  I hope that we can help guide her into the right direction, but of course I am afraid it will make me hate her in the end. I Dont want that to happen. We actually plan to take her rent money, and put it into savings for her.

     About the making rules, well its only 200 a month, you cant find that anywhere, that includes her cell phone bill ( which we pay) and all utilities. She does know my feelings of being nervous about this, I am open with her on that. We have a good relationship, and she knows this is a really really big favor for her.

  • I think Sgt M's Wife is dead on, this is a privilege, not a right, that she's being granted and if she really does want to improve her own situation, she shouldn't have any problem sticking to the rules.  It would be very easy for her to start taking you for granted as babysitters, trust me, so stick to your guns on that one!
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