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Caught Him
So my (soon to be former) fiance got a new ipad. He downloaded a bunch of cool apps including Craigslist. I knew his log-on since we don't hide things from each other and are totally open (so I thought). Yesterday I tried logging on to his CL account and lo and behold the password has changed along with his email password. He also has other email accounts he supposedly doesn't use. I had to work 12 hours yesterday and when I came home yesterday he had cleaned the house, fixed a few things, and made a candlelight dinner. He's never done this and my gut told me he was overcompensating for something bad. I snooped in his iPad and found his internet history. Full of St. Louis (where we live) and Los Angeles CL ads he's checked out. They were for m4t, and dom/sub girls in our area!!!!! I don't know if he has an ad out or has responded but I was sickened!!!!! To me this is cheating!!!!! He woke up this morning screaming about our puppy waking him up and said he wanted to get rid of her. I want him gone now but I have a few hurdles and need help on how to overcome them. The first being we're going on a trip to see my best friend in Maine tomorrow via plane. If I could get his money back for the flight I paid for I'd do it in a heartbeat! The second is we live together. Right now he doesn't work or do anything except troll for men and women. If I kick him out (which is my plan) I don't know where he'd go or what to do if he won't move. I don't want any criticizing, just help please:)
Re: Caught Him
Just a thought, but you might want to be sure of his intentions before you go off the deep end here. Though I can certainly see why you would be upset.
Don't take him on the trip. Give him that time to move out.
I thought you said you got rid of him.
Anyways, take the loss on the tickets and kick him out of the house.
You won't have much time to internalize what you saw/found out. And there will be less said by him that will get into the mix; you know he's going to lie.
What to do:
Protect your assets and property and money --- make sure he cannot get at them
See an attorney if you have kids or property together or are involved in a dual ownership for something
Get tested --- you have no assurance he didn't have sex with these individuals
And when all is ready, go.
Call the police if he does not leave. Maybe that will work.
Maybe I'm paranoid, but I would NOT leave on a trip and tell him to move out while you're away. Sounds like a recipe for disaster. Make sure that he is monitored while he get's his shit out.
Click me, click me!
If he is not and he is drinking --- or claims he's quit --- leave him based on the fact he is a drunk.
A drunk is no candidate for marriage. Give him the boot.
And if you don't, get yourself to AlAnon. You need it for support.