Post Wedding Blues

kayTbean318

I just got married in June, and even though it was very stressful planning our wedding, it turned out perfectly. Now it's October, and we are having a beautiful autumn here in Michigan. I always thought I would have a fall wedding, and now I find myself moping around wishing we would have had a fall wedding/being sad that it's all over! Anyone else having post wedding blues? I feel like I'm losing my mind. I couldn't wait for the planning to be over, and now I wish I could do it again! Please tell me I'm not crazy!

anssett

This is pretty common. Many women get so obsessed with the planning of the wedding they actually feel let down afterward and sometimes have slight depression over the lack of next 'big thing' to work on. Don't stress about it, move forward. What is coming up for you? Work goals, life goals, hobbies, trips, etc? If you need a new project, find one! (don't rush into babies to fill this void. Plan for babies rationally!)

kayTbean318

Haha no babies yet for sure! I never thought I would be that girl who missed the wedding stress. But I am starting a new job and getting back into yoga, so hopefully I move on

srfr8908

I actually am in the same position...kind of. :-) We got married last October. We will celebrate our 1-year this Sunday. Our wedding was perfect and I LOVED how it all turned out, but for the past few months, as more of my friends have gotten married, I've caught myself being sad and wanting to change things about my wedding and do it over. Seems crazy and SO silly, and I actually feel bad for feeling that way! I just feel like I want a redo to change some things. Especially my dress...I keep regretting my dress decision and wishing I would have tried more on to get a better perspective and not let myself get pressured into buying the one I bought. I don't know.....it all does feel, like I said, crazy and silly.

chrisnjay05212010

ive heard this alot, i personally was glad it was all over.  With your new job and starting yoga, i'm sure the blues will fade soon.

TarponMonoxide

The grass is always greener. That's why.

cordsniper

I was so happy and relieved it was over, I can't imagine wanting to do it again.  I'm happy to be relaxing and enjoying my hubby.  Maybe you need a hobby...

kss20

Start planning a 10 year anniversary vow renewal! 

jessica490

I've been married for over 1 year and I definitely had the post-wedding blues. I don't regret anything that we did, but I did start searching the web for wedding planning jobs haha. Never found anything so eventually I got over it. What I did start (and am still working on) is a giant scrap book of "our story" to when we first met, to our first pet, our first home, getting engaged, engagement party, bridal shower etc, all the way through our first year anniversary (which was an awesome cruise!) But I've been working on this scrapbook for over 1 year going page by page, section by section and just taking my time. I love it because I'm re-living those memories all over again and I cant wait to show everyone once it's done! Maybe that's something that would be fun for you. good luck!

Leftie22

Personally, I hated planning my wedding and couldn't wait for it to be over! But I think it's fairly common for some people to feel sad. I didn't know what the H to do with our wedding cards, so I made them into a cute little book. You just hole punch them, buy a binder ring to hold them together, and make a nice cover. Maybe something like that would be fun for closure?

Sillygirl45

Well, we were married 3 years ago in West MI! I loved the fall wedding. But we were worried the colors would be done by our wedding. They were not peak. They were lovely, but certainly not perfect. 

This year the colors are very late and meh. You would not have wanted to plan this fall. You can't ever have it perfect. I'm sure your wedding was lovely and exactly as it should have been.

cutiepie0104

This happened to me. Instead of concentrating on what could have been think about a 5 year anniversary celebration. Im from MI too and am loving the Fall right now.

kayTbean318

Gee, thanks @cordsniper

Everyone else, it's good to know I'm not a weirdo!

paine2ad

I completely understand!! I live in MI too- just got married a few weeks ago in Livonia and I feel like I've lost something. I'm so happy to have married the love of my life but I feel like I was looking forward to it for so long and now it's over. Our amazing honeymoon is over and since we're not planning on having kids for awhile I feel like I have NOTHING to look forward to for a long long time :-(. So I don't really have any advice but I'm in the same boat as you! 

WendyGR

paine2ad said:

I completely understand!! I live in MI too- just got married a few weeks ago in Livonia and I feel like I've lost something. I'm so happy to have married the love of my life but I feel like I was looking forward to it for so long and now it's over. Our amazing honeymoon is over and since we're not planning on having kids for awhile I feel like I have NOTHING to look forward to for a long long time :-(. So I don't really have any advice but I'm in the same boat as you! 

Nothing to look forward to? DH and I are not having kids ever and have plenty to look forward to! House projects, vacations, family events... Just because it's not as "big" or AW as a wedding or baby doesn't mean you can't find joy in everyday life.

erollis

I missed the day. Not the planning. DH was the same way ( but didn't feel the blues nearly as bad).

Once you start distracting yourself with new goals (and getting excited over being a married woman) you'll feel better.

anssett

paine2ad said:

 I feel like I have NOTHING to look forward to for a long long time :-(. 

I think you're doing something wrong if this is the case. Hobbies? Personal goals? Career goals? Travel goals? Learn something new. Do something new. Do anything!

rlyttle

I was the same way. BUT I was that girl who got pregnant and that totally cured it. haha It was our plan all along to TTC right after we got married though. We were 28 and we had been together since we were 23. So we were ready. A new job will help. I always have to have things to look forward to and plan though. I'm always planning our next vacation  

Raelynnablair

I understand for sure. Everything was perfect except my groom. He had a panic attack. We are in our early 30's and had been together for all most 8 years before getting married. School had to be finished(PhD). Anyway he had a pannic attack during our ceremony. He does not like big crowds and life changes are hard for him. I thought that after he graduated college and had to be an adult. This just solidified that. He made it through the ceremony, and after a half an hour, two Xanex, he was good. But it knocked me off my game. I didn't introduce people to people I wanted to. Like co-workers to my mom or my new husband to other people. I did not float as much as I wanted to. I still feel really bad about it actually. At least I know how to keep him calm when having babies. :-)

paine2ad

Having a goal isnt going to help me miss planning my wedding and I work 60-70 hours a week so I definitely "do something" already.

BulgariHeart

I've been married for over two years and still mope that it's over. LOL. I found home decorating, scrapbooking and anniversary celebration planning to be the best forms of distraction (besides working of course). I created a post-planning wedding scrapbook, framed the best photos, ordered a few enlargements and organized a small gallery at home, I neatly placed most of the wedding related stuff in a box and displayed a few things in a couple of light boxes and so on... I tried to get busy We had a destination rock the dress session for our first anniversary for which I also did a bit of planning. That helped too.