A Past & Present 3T-er Discussion

ecinereb

Amanda this is a great topic and obviously everyone has very different feelings on the subject.

I think it is very different for each person. You can never know how a person feels even if you are or did go through a similar experience. I think the phrase ' I know how you feel' is probably more of the issue here than the real issue at the heart of this discussion.

Even though I'm pregnant now I still very much know how I felt when going through 3T and losses. I have had those feelings that Amanda mentioned and I still think about them, I'm still not convinced the other shoe isn't going to drop tomorrow. I'd like to think if I told a friend 'I know how you feel', that they'd realize that I did go through the same feelings and I do understand. I hope I would never say that phrase but just be there to support them. Things might be different and I might feel differently once I have a baby but I will still remember.

amandaf6383

tdmd09 said:

I felt like I fit into the 3T category because I had two miscarriages, and the pain from my losses has never gone away. I still have reminders of what I have lost every time I see my best friend's son who was born on my first baby's due date. He reminds me of how old my first child would have been, and what milestones he'd be tackling in that moment. And it hurts. People (who hadn't had losses) told me that somehow when I had a baby in my arms that that pain would go away because if I hadn't lost those babies, I wouldn't have L, but they didn't know what they were talking about, and I still hurt.

I'm so sorry that people were so blatantly insensitive. What an awful thing to say.

wiggyslilsis

I just have to say that seahorse really hit the nail on the head with everything I was thinking and feeling.

I agree that I cannot know how somebody feels when struggling with IF and 3T but I do think I have a different perspective than those who have never struggled.

I also very much agree with @saralynn07

I spend a lot of time thinking about being sensitive to those that are struggling and I have thought about going away because I don't know how people are feeling so I can't always say or do the right thing but I try.

I have my daughter. This does not erase the time I struggled but it puts a different spin on it. I know the fear but I don't know the reality of not having a family. If that makes sense.

sgautschi

I agree with what wiggy said about not being IF or 3T but still having a different perspective than someone who just gets pregnant right when they want. My endometriosis dx made TTC nerve racking, and put me in a different mindset than the average woman right off the bat, but I was lucky that it (amazingly) didn't interfere much with my TTC journey and because of that I will never know what it feels like to experience 3T. I will never be able to fully understand those who have, but I still feel like I can be supportive because of how much I've learned from you ladies, this thread included.

carcrashheart

ILoveRedVino said:

I think that *most* of the time, 3T graduates can't understand. While they may have had worries, when that BFP shows up, you just change. You do. There are some exceptions. I think @carcrashheart and @cheezus still get it. Also- I think there is a big difference between those who are 3T and those who have infertility. My definition is different.

i do get it. maybe i'm in the minority? but i really do get it, even while i was pregnant. it may have seemed like i had forgotten, but that wasn't even close to true. i had to force myself to think/act like a happy pregnant person.

MH1006

poppies717 said:

My goal is to be like Bruins when (not if!) I get pregnant.

Oh Jesus.

MadeOfAwesome

 

MH1006 said:

poppies717 said:

My goal is to be like Bruins when (not if!) I get pregnant.

Oh Jesus.

 

And exactly what the fuck is that supposed to mean?

MH1006

Calm down

BruinsBabe33

MadeOfAwesome said:

 

MH1006 said:

poppies717 said:

My goal is to be like Bruins when (not if!) I get pregnant.

Oh Jesus.

 

And exactly what the fuck is that supposed to mean?

Mh hates me and thinks I'm an asshole. She comes out on threads that have potential drama to stir shit up. She lurked because her and her husband were struggling to get pregnant, so she knows everything about us while having never introduced herself. It's her job to defend people who won't stand up for themselves against the hateful bitches here. Did I miss anything?

nightmare_of_beauty

MadeOfAwesome said:

 

MH1006 said:

poppies717 said:

My goal is to be like Bruins when (not if!) I get pregnant.

Oh Jesus.

 

And exactly what the fuck is that supposed to mean?

Not trying to jump into a fight, but I do agree. There are many ladies on here who have stayed around after getting PR that have been awesome. I should have been better about it like they have been. 

MadeOfAwesome

MH1006 said:

Calm down

I'm guessing that was addressed to me?  You're a fucking peach.  Bless your heart.

MadeOfAwesome

BruinsBabe33 said:

 

MH1006 said:

poppies717 said:

My goal is to be like Bruins when (not if!) I get pregnant.

Oh Jesus.

 

And exactly what the fuck is that supposed to mean?

Mh hates me and thinks I'm an asshole. She comes out on threads that have potential drama to stir shit up. She lurked because her and her husband were struggling to get pregnant, so she knows everything about us while having never introduced herself. It's her job to defend people who won't stand up for themselves against the hateful bitches here. Did I miss anything?

No, MH doesn't hate any of us.  That's why she's still here being a creepy lurker.  She can't get enough of us. 

islandmonkey8

MH1006 said:

poppies717 said:

My goal is to be like Bruins when (not if!) I get pregnant.

Oh Jesus.

You shouldn't take the Lord's name in vain @mh1006.

@seahorse01, isn't this flagable? It's offensive.

lilliesandvino

MH1006 said:

poppies717 said:

My goal is to be like Bruins when (not if!) I get pregnant.

Oh Jesus.

God, you're obnoxious.

I'm glad you still have time for lurking during your divorce, btw.

MadeOfAwesome

LOL.  lillies, I was going to say something, but figured that maybe it was a bit harsh.  I was wrong.  Still funny.

amandaf6383

MH1006 said:

poppies717 said:

My goal is to be like Bruins when (not if!) I get pregnant.

Oh Jesus.

Oh sweetie, you're such a fucking bitch. Can you just stop creeping around here now?

seahorse01

islandmonkey8 said:

MH1006 said:

poppies717 said:

My goal is to be like Bruins when (not if!) I get pregnant.

Oh Jesus.

You shouldn't take the Lord's name in vain @mh1006.

@seahorse01, isn't this flagable? It's offensive.

lol.  Nice try, but no.

seahorse01

islandmonkey8 said:

MH1006 said:

poppies717 said:

My goal is to be like Bruins when (not if!) I get pregnant.

Oh Jesus.

You shouldn't take the Lord's name in vain @mh1006.

@seahorse01, isn't this flagable? It's offensive.

lol.  Nice try, but no.

lilliesandvino

MadeOfAwesome said:

BruinsBabe33 said:

MadeOfAwesome said:

 

MH1006 said:

poppies717 said:

My goal is to be like Bruins when (not if!) I get pregnant.

Oh Jesus.

 

And exactly what the fuck is that supposed to mean?

Mh hates me and thinks I'm an asshole. She comes out on threads that have potential drama to stir shit up. She lurked because her and her husband were struggling to get pregnant, so she knows everything about us while having never introduced herself. It's her job to defend people who won't stand up for themselves against the hateful bitches here. Did I miss anything?




No, MH doesn't hate any of us.  That's why she's still here being a creepy lurker.  She can't get enough of us. 


And cause she doesn't have a life

lilliesandvino

MadeOfAwesome said:

LOL.  lillies, I was going to say something, but figured that maybe it was a bit harsh.  I was wrong.  Still funny.

I was hoping I remembered right. It's hard to keep all the mud straight.

MadeOfAwesome

MH is so silly.  Doesn't she realize that no one needs defending in this post??  NO KNIGHTS ON WHITE HORSES NECESSARY!!

MH1006

It is entertaining. I've said it before and I'll say it again, I've learned a lot from this board. Some on here are more tactful than others. Bruins isn't someone I would aspire to be like. Why would I ever introduce myself? Look how you treat people on here. (Plus i'm no longer TTC, so my opinion would no longer be relevant...not that it ever would have been to you anyway.) I'd rather pop in once in a while when I find something completely ridiculous or have something worth saying. I'll admit my comment wasn't worth saying... I just found it humorous.

MadeOfAwesome

<---- not TTC.  I'd like to think my opinion is still relevant.... and if not, I'm posting it anyway

PandPMeant2B

MH1006 said:

It is entertaining. I've said it before and I'll say it again, I've learned a lot from this board. Some on here are more tactful than others. Bruins isn't someone I would aspire to be like. Why would I ever introduce myself? Look how you treat people on here. (Plus i'm no longer TTC, so my opinion would no longer be relevant...not that it ever would have been to you anyway.) I'd rather pop in once in a while when I find something completely ridiculous or have something worth saying. I'll admit my comment wasn't worth saying... I just found it humorous.

I won't attempt to speak for everyone, but I've been treated amazingly.  You get what you give. Thanks for understanding...

LuckyAngel07

MH1006 said:

It is entertaining. I've said it before and I'll say it again, I've learned a lot from this board. Some on here are more tactful than others. Bruins isn't someone I would aspire to be like. Why would I ever introduce myself? Look how you treat people on here. (Plus i'm no longer TTC, so my opinion would no longer be relevant...not that it ever would have been to you anyway.) I'd rather pop in once in a while when I find something completely ridiculous or have something worth saying. I'll admit my comment wasn't worth saying... I just found it humorous.

Oh face it, you never intro'd yourself because you like jumping in and perpetuating your delusion that we're all evil. You couldn't do that anymore if you actually made an effort to be part of the community. You'd rather stir up shit than belong.

MH1006

I'm sorry...I thought it was funny, but clearly it was not. I'm done with this thread and I hope you all are, too. It got ridiculous, I tried to lighten the mood and failed. Rather than going back to being ridiculous, I think it's time to peace out.

islandmonkey8

seahorse01 said:

islandmonkey8 said:

MH1006 said:

poppies717 said:

My goal is to be like Bruins when (not if!) I get pregnant.

Oh Jesus.

You shouldn't take the Lord's name in vain @mh1006.

@seahorse01, isn't this flagable? It's offensive.

lol.  Nice try, but no.

Oh boo!

Aimothy

MH1006 said:

I'm sorry...I thought it was funny, but clearly it was not. I'm done with this thread and I hope you all are, too. It got ridiculous, I tried to lighten the mood and failed. Rather than going back to being ridiculous, I think it's time to peace out.

Are you done like all the other times you've been done with us?  Or are you just done like you've never done before? Because I really need to know if you are done done or just done?

MadeOfAwesome

MH1006 said:

I'm sorry...I thought it was funny, but clearly it was not. I'm done with this thread and I hope you all are, too. It got ridiculous, I tried to lighten the mood and failed. Rather than going back to being ridiculous, I think it's time to peace out.

Your sense of "humor" is whack.  Yes, of course, trying to be bitchy to one of the most loved members here is TOTALLY going to be hilarious.  The mood is lightened, y'all!

MH1006

Aimothy said:

MH1006 said:

I'm sorry...I thought it was funny, but clearly it was not. I'm done with this thread and I hope you all are, too. It got ridiculous, I tried to lighten the mood and failed. Rather than going back to being ridiculous, I think it's time to peace out.

Are you done like all the other times you've been done with us?  Or are you just done like you've never done before? Because I really need to know if you are done done or just done?

I believe I said I was done with the thread, bright one.