Holidays
shelbyholden
member
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Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
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Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Whose Home for the Holidays?
in Holidays
Since my husband and I have been together, Thanksgiving and Christmas have been more stressful than enjoyable.
For Thanksgiving we have had to go to my husband's parents house first where they have tons of family over to eat and socialize. It is always a big get together for them. Then we end up being the first to leave to rush over to my parents house to try to eat yet another Thanksgiving meal. At my parent's house it is only my mother, father, and younger brother. They do not have any family to come visit them besides me so I would feel bad if I didn't see them.
My husband and I are expecting our first baby around Christmas time so we have been talking and want to break away from the chaos of having to travel house to house for the holidays and start out own family traditions here at our home. I mentioned just having my parents come over for Thanksgiving since they do not have any family to visit with. My husband became defensive and said that if we are going to start having traditions on our own he wants it to just be us and the baby- no parents. But this makes me feel really bad about leaving my parents by themselves.
It is the same situation around Christmas time. My husband and I rush to open our gifts for each other then go to his parents house (again they usually have visitors however not as many as around Thanksgiving time) and then rush to my parents house (just my mom, dad, and brother).
Again I've entertained the idea of going to my in-laws for Christmas Eve and maybe having my parents over for Christmas dinner, but my husband and I can't seem to agree. His mother and I have always had problems so I think he believes I may just be trying to avoid her. I just want to start our own family traditions without leaving my parents alone, but also not offending his family. I would invite both of our parents over at the same time but his mother and father are always entertaining his family and have guests of their own.
Has anyone gone through this and what did you decide to do? I feel like maybe I'm not being creative enough in figuring out how to split time for everyone. We definitely will not be able to travel like we currently do with a newborn. This has been more of a burden than it should be! Any advice is appreciated.
PS: We are a young couple so I think our parents expect us to still come to their places for the holidays.
Re: Whose Home for the Holidays?
Thanksgiving is up to you. If I were in your position I wouldn't focus so much on the actual day and more on celebrating. For example, maybe see his family on Thursday and then plan a nice gathering with your family the following Sat or Sun.
Another possibility would be switching years. You see his parents this year and your family the next. This way you aren't driving all over town to see people on one day. Then do the opposite on Christmas, so whatever family you don't see on Thanksgiving, you will see on Christmas and vice versa the following year.