Is this due to smoking?

lolasmit

My husband quit smoking 5 months ago. Ever since he quit he has been very anxious and snaps for things that never used to get to him before. 

When he used to smoke he was very calm, and now he isn't. An example is - I had 4 slices of bread, and when he got home he was very angry with me because he said I was supposed to know that he was saving those slices to make french toast. Then, I had been worried sick because he had gone to work in the middle of a snow storm so when he got home I was just hugging him and so glad that he hadn't gotten into an accident. Even that upset him because he couldn't find a place to get food from, so I asked him if he'd like me to cook for him he barks no. He refuses to speak to me, and just all these little things really aggravate and upset him to the point that sometimes he just throws things (not at me) and wants to yell. 

When I brought up in conversation how his behavior has changed and that I am not sure how to handle it he was the one that said that he has been feeling very anxious, irritable, and angry since he quit smoking. He said he has been trying to deal with it, but he just can't. . .

I don't know what to do or how to help him except to really stay out of his way..

spikeinc

It took my husband more than a year to get back to normal, everyday behavior after he quit smoking. The first six months were awful, with the first four being pretty unbearable. It wasn't until two years after that I felt he could go somewhere and not be emotionally affected by the smell of smoke. Honestly, your H will get back to normal eventually as long as he stays away from the cigarettes. I knew it was going to be bad going into it so I made it a point to be MUCH more sympathetic and patient with him for as long as it took.

      This does not mean that you shouldn't make him aware and ask him to try to be nicer. Remind him how proud of him you are but ask him to see if he can make more of an effort to try not to take it out on you. That is pretty much all you can do. Now if after a year he still behaves in this manner, then I would consider talking about going to therapy. Though I think hitting up therapy even now might help him learn how to deal with his anxiety. Good Luck!

moonprincessd

Yes that is normal. Nicotine is an addiction and it's hard to get over. Has he been to a doctor? They might be able to give him something for the mood swings, but otherwise it will take a year or 2 before things go back to normal. 

My grandma was so irritable when she quit, it was awful, but she got better, and then she started smoking again when she found out she had cancer.... but besides the point, it's normal. Just give it time.

NavyBlue143

My dad tried to quit dipping several years ago, and about 2 months in my mom went and bought a can of it, threw it at him, and told him to use it or she wanted a divorce. It's funny now.... He had since quit though.

Has he tried e cigarettes? That might be a better way for him to quit. He can gradually reduce the nicotine content to 0, and then still use the e cig for the "hand to mouth" habit or give it up. Not the dinky 1.5 volt ones either, the ones that look like cigarettes. Those are junk. A mod version will have better nicotine delivery. H uses one, because with his job he just cannot give up nicotine and still be bearable to be around. I want him to give up nicotine, but I prefer he stay sane. He has decreased the amount though. It takes time to find one you like. A good vape store will be able to help him try several out.

spikeinc

NavyBlue143 said:

My dad tried to quit dipping several years ago, and about 2 months in my mom went and bought a can of it, threw it at him, and told him to use it or she wanted a divorce. It's funny now.... He had since quit though. Has he tried e cigarettes? That might be a better way for him to quit. He can gradually reduce the nicotine content to 0, and then still use the e cig for the "hand to mouth" habit or give it up. Not the dinky 1.5 volt ones either, the ones that look like cigarettes. Those are junk. A mod version will have better nicotine delivery. H uses one, because with his job he just cannot give up nicotine and still be bearable to be around. I want him to give up nicotine, but I prefer he stay sane. He has decreased the amount though. It takes time to find one you like. A good vape store will be able to help him try several out.

Since your H has already quit for 5 months, this is a terrible idea. Nicotine leaves your system in 48 hours. After that it is the psychological effects that you have to learn to handle. Learning how to handle your emotions and deal with stress without picking up a "crutch" is what is so hard to do and can cause many a bad mood swing. Just have him keep at it. It won't be much longer before you see him start evening out.

lolasmit

He used to smoke the e-cigarettes and they actually made him more addicted. He smoked so much more with the e-cigarettes. I am so glad that's what the issue was though. I had no idea that it would last this long for him to get back to "normal". I simply had the idea that the nicotine is out of the body in 48 hours, and that's that. 

Thank you so much. This means that I just have to have more patience and be more supportive. I honestly had thought he was using it as an excuse. Last time he tried to quit and went to the doctor the meds they gave him made him worst, so he just decided to quit this time due to me being pregnant. He decided that he didn't want his daughter to be around a father that smoked, thankfully. That was what was great, that he chose to do it himself!!

Thanks a lot