SIL gossips to her kids that our teenage son is gay! (kinda long sorry)

NAOMI220099

H's nephew is the most loveable kid its SIL & their intentions. Last Christmas nephew was speaking his own language being silly then SIL was like speak english if you dont you shouldnt be in America. This may be her views but this is a global community. If anyone want their kids to be successful then more than likely these kind of views all together could be viewed as quite bigoted...& they should be left in the dark ages. Hearing this I thought to myself isnt America the name Italian in orgin, & the Native Americans were here first right I could have said something back in choctaw, & if someone says these things then claim Christianity are they not familiar with the tower of Babel & if all thats the case then people worshipping idols would be to blame for the many different languages spoken today.
I remember when their daughter was briefly my friend on fb she had a video of people with black painted faces eating watermelon she was preteen immature with her friends making jokes. Then I would see her in a Bob Marley shirt..their children are confused. Bashing communities based on the language they speak, color of their skin, & sexual orientation not because people have personally wronged them is wrong. My grandparents immigrated from italy were never a burden on tax payers.
Past week not a peep.

TarponMonoxide

I'm meh on the "Speak English etc" comment. I'd have to have been there to hear the entire context of it.

Getting back to the gay comment:

Make sure this mess ends and ends now. Put your foot down and make it clear that she's nasty and her comnents are unacceptable.

NAOMI220099

I will most definately, they live in a small country town. Thinking being a hick or hillbilly is a good stereotype. Lets just say when she was over due with her last kid, BIL took her 4 wheeling & mudding trying to induce labor. Then when she did go into labor had complications. I have never said this about anyone but not the sharpest tool in the shed & not dealing with a full deck. We are camping easter going to a earthday workshop kid activities included at a ranch...real reasonable prices. As for the birthday she didnt come to our youngest last one...she has only been to one & BIL two thats for the past 8yrs, Im ok with that.
Since I blocked them they havent said anything, I dont feel guilty for treasuring family moments with out them. Their kids sometimes sound like them or I can tell they talk behind our backs, my oldest & H would tell ya I dont sit around & gossip I save my complaints for the councelor & this has helped me better than some articles.
I posted here cause I never tried it & exchanging ideas & listening to other peoples input or what they are dealing with helps. I think in todays society their should be open dialogue but unfortunately you could put it as caring as can be & they would be offended. I just want them to be more sensitive & less abrasive & I feel like Im singled out. Sometimes they do stuff on the sly.
Also I am African American, Italian, & Choctaw, when my hair is straight I look Latino & the English remark is always being directed towards the Spanish speaking community.

TarponMonoxide

Your counselor will also tell you not to enable anybody and not to let this mess turn into a codependency.

The less you see of these nutters that insult other people or say nasty things about them, the better off you will be. You don't want to slight the cousins but then again, who wants them having their mind polluted by their mother -- then they do what, go arnd repeat this back to your son, "yeah we heard you are gay." Really? This isn't great for anybody.

chiualover

JulienC said:

Tofumonkey said:

JulienC said:

I'd be pissed if someone called my son gay and I totally get what you're saying. I think your fiancee was right to say something and I'm glad to hear he confronted SIL and defended your son. Someone needed to stand up to her. I'd probably keep my son as far away from SIL as possible and just let him know she isn't someone trustworthy and that he shouldn't take her seriously.

I hope you'll get better advise on here than I did because according to one person calling a kid fat isn't the worst thing you can say to someone and allowing someone to get to you for calling you gay in the year 2014 is really sad. Yes, that was discussed in the Neighbor Issue post. So, hopefully you'll have better luck  than I did on here and hear from people who can empathize with others.

You are seriously nuts. THAT is what you got from that post and are hanging on to? Seriously?

There's no need to call someone nuts on here. That is really rude and nasty. How can you come on here and blast me for stating the truth? But if you insist please privately message me on your feelings so that we don't take anything away from this post.

Tofu was being kind.