Married Life
Mamageedee
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Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
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Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Not sure how to take this...
in Married Life
My DH and I are driving and talking about needing to loose weight. We are both overweight. He is pushing 300lb and I'm around 250. I was telling him I was reading how many hours on the ellipticle it takes just to burn off a burger/ fries and a soda. And this is what he says...
"yeah, I (meaning him) need to start riding my bike again. I (meaning him) remember when I was down 40lb when I was riding my bike a lot and eating a lot of yogurt. Thats when Leslie the old secretary at work was working there."
So I pause for a minute and turn to him and say "wait, what"? Then I said "what does the secretary at work have to do with you loosing weight"? He says "well I just remember thats when it was... she was working there". I'm still baffled and like I don't get it how you contribute your weightloss to when THE SECRETARY LESLIE WORKED THERE?!? Then he blew up and got really mad that I was pointing that out. He said he had no idea why he thought of the secretary when he was remembering that time and he thought I was crazy for questioning him about it.
So I ask you ladies....... WTF? Am I crazy for thinking thats the most bizarre memory match up or what???
"yeah, I (meaning him) need to start riding my bike again. I (meaning him) remember when I was down 40lb when I was riding my bike a lot and eating a lot of yogurt. Thats when Leslie the old secretary at work was working there."
So I pause for a minute and turn to him and say "wait, what"? Then I said "what does the secretary at work have to do with you loosing weight"? He says "well I just remember thats when it was... she was working there". I'm still baffled and like I don't get it how you contribute your weightloss to when THE SECRETARY LESLIE WORKED THERE?!? Then he blew up and got really mad that I was pointing that out. He said he had no idea why he thought of the secretary when he was remembering that time and he thought I was crazy for questioning him about it.
So I ask you ladies....... WTF? Am I crazy for thinking thats the most bizarre memory match up or what???
Re: Not sure how to take this...
You seem to be looking for something here and I'm not sure what it is.
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He merely associates the weight loss with Leslie. No big deal.
I can see where you're probably going with your thought pattern here, and from the short interaction you described, I think you may be overreacting.
TBH, in the same situation, I probably would have asked something similar ("Wait... what? What does Leslie have to do with anything?")... but when he shrugged it off as just his way of matching up the timeframe, I would have dropped it.
Has Leslie come up before in conversation? Does he make mention of her frequently (maybe at the time when they worked together and/or missing her now that they don't work together)? Is there a pattern here that you're not mentioning?
If so, please elaborate to give a fuller picture. (Are we traveling down the path that you don't trust him and suspect infidelity?)
If not, I would say this really is NBD and you're making more out of it than is needed.
Thanks for the feedback!!!
I guess I'm just a jealous person cus I'd prolly be concerned by that comment too. I'm not saying i'd automatically assume he had sex with her... but I would think that he may have liked her... But i'm just the crazy wife who doesn't think its okay for my husband to have a "crush" or "just like" another woman at all.
It could be just a strange association cus my husband has those all the time and perhaps theres a totally normal reason he connects the two instances but i think its natural and normal to want to know the connection - cus men always have a reason for connecting things. Just the fact that she worked there doesn't line up with him losing weight.... Maybe she was eating healthy too and he felt fat to eat crap next to someone eating a salad everyday - that would be valid but I wouldn't "drop it" without knowing the reason for the connection