Help with in-laws & being nice, when it's SO hard!

EllenG27

I'm seeing in-laws today and trying to remind myself to be nice. It's just so hard sometimes! Anyone else feel that way?

I have a sister-in-law who is just so selfish, tells many lies to get attention, and all I want to do is call her out on it! But I have to hold my tongue; doesn't always work though. There's a lot of one-up-manship and pretending like life is great, when we all know that her life isn't great and she's just faking. I guess there's a little advice for myself - she's just trying to pretend everything is ok and sometimes that's not a bad thing.

So I have to be nice today because our last interaction wasn't very nice. Any advice on how to just bite your tongue??

TarponMonoxide

Can't you just avoid her when you can?

GilliC

Just remind yourself of all the things you just wrote. She's making herself feel better. You don't have to lie and one-up, because you're happy with your life. Just silently feel sorry for her that she's struggling to just be content with her situation.

keverhart123

I know it's tough when it comes to in-laws. I have the same problem with mine. I love them, but they can drive me crazy, and they aren't always pleasant to be around. You never know what kind of mood they will be in. They're not the most welcoming group of people and they can be very difficult. But, I just had to tell myself.. this is important to my husband that I come around, so I will smile and just deal with it for him. You know the type of person she is, and the fact she isn't fooling you gives you one up on her. Just avoid her.. mingle with the other people that will be there. And if you have to talk to her, just listen to what she has to say and speak very little. Cause if you're like me, the wrong things will come out lol. Good luck!! 

Ilumine

EllenG27 said:

I'm seeing in-laws today and trying to remind myself to be nice. It's just so hard sometimes! Anyone else feel that way?

I have a sister-in-law who is just so selfish, tells many lies to get attention, and all I want to do is call her out on it! But I have to hold my tongue; doesn't always work though. There's a lot of one-up-manship and pretending like life is great, when we all know that her life isn't great and she's just faking. I guess there's a little advice for myself - she's just trying to pretend everything is ok and sometimes that's not a bad thing.

So I have to be nice today because our last interaction wasn't very nice. Any advice on how to just bite your tongue??

So your sister in law is having a tough go at it and instead of bringing you into her world, or worse going around begging for help/money and all YOU can do is want to judge her and point out her weaknesses to all around?

What does it matter to YOU, how does it affect YOU?  If it does't directly affect your day to day life or even the next 5 minutes after her commentary, then you ignore it and move on. 

NoneForUs

When I have to be around in-laws whom I dislike, I just smile and nod. I also remind myself that they are my husband's family. 

People who brag are insecure and hurting inside. Remember that when you deal with your SIL.