My husband didn't ask permission to touch my rear end

DelilahBowie

So we have been married about two years and we of course have had sex many times. However, the other day he came up behind me and grabbed my ass, and it really upset me. Does he just think it's okay to just touch me like that? I am so upset I spent the night at my mom's house. I think we can work it out, but he can't act like I'm a piece of meat. He should just know that it's not okay to grab women like that!! I know his mom raised him better than that. Ugh. What would you guys do?

janined22

Did he grab your ass when you were both alone or in front of others say your parents?

VOR

I. I don't know what to say to this. You aren't "women". I'm not saying that as his wief, he can just do whatever he wants. But unless you've previously told him "don't just grab me", I think showing physical affection (including grabbing your butt) is a normal part of marriage. There has to be more to this. Has to be.

Disneygeek77

I guess I treat my husband like a piece of meat because I grab his butt all the time.  He has a nice one. 

englishtrish1

This strikes me as odd, did he grab your ass in an aggressive or affectionate manner? Was it at home or in public? Are you guys conservatives lights off, only make love in the bed kinda people? In my mind unless there are things you are not saying you are overreacting

janined22

I think she is overreacting because there was no need whatsoever for her to leave to her parent's house, a simple honey, I really don't feel comfortable when you do that could have been enough.  I don't see anything wrong when my husband grabs my butt, I wouldn't want him to do it in front of my parents but if we're alone I don't mind at all.

BlueBirdMB

Um we grab each other's asses all the time... it's affectionate. 

GilliC

This seems like a muddy situation.

Have you ever told your H that you don't want him to do that?

doeydo

I'm with others that ass grabbing is kind of a normal thing IMO, however, if you are not comfortable with just being touched out of the blue like that, then you need to talk to him about it.  

ETA  does it trigger a flashback for you?  If that is what the problem is, then definitely talk to him about it.

puppylove2014

OP, could you share why this is such a big deal to you? I could understand such upset if this was a stranger or someone you just started dating, but your husband of 2 years? It seems over the top unless there is more to the story.

nurse714

Sounds like MUD, but I'll play. My husband grabs or smacks my butt all the time when we are alone and I like it. He never has to ask me, but if you just don't like it for whatever reason, just ask him not to do it. You getting so mad and leaving the house over something like this seems odd. Something is missing. 

noffgurl

Looking at my marriage I can see a few things to leave the house for the night for, ass grabbing is most certainly not one of them. It would actually land him in bed, lights on, whole shebang. . .

TheMadHatter93

I think the only way it would be justified to take off to your parents would have been if you just had butt surgery and he violently grabbed it... other than that it seems pretty normal. Even if this was in a public place (where it would be inappropriate) it doesn't really warrant that reaction.

Even if I expressly tell my husband that I don't want to be touched or that I am not feeling well and he touches me - I just take a step back and tell him that I am serious about not wanting to be touched and he needs to respect that. 

Otherwise I think it is normal (and nice) to have a husband who will just come over and grab you without asking - asking kind of takes the passion out of the action itself. 

xNimirrax

All I can say is wow, really? Your husband grabs your ass and you leave for your parents house that night? Maybe you should have not gotten married.

As others have said, if it is something you don't like, you should just be able to tell him that you didn't like it.

If I didn't like my husband grabbing my butt, I wouldn't have gotten married. He does it all the time before and after we were married. There have been a few times in public where I've been like hey, maybe not here but that's all it took.