Any tips on curbing the whining?

lala5507

My 5 year old has always been a whiner, but the older she gets the more I can't stand it.  I guess you could say she is a sensitive kid.  Every little issue is a major life crisis to her.  I feel like a broken record saying, "if you use your real voice and calm down I will help you/listen to you..."  I have never heard my 4 year old whine.  Are some kids just programed to be whiney?   Any tips for me?

Luckystar2

I have no idea. My kid is also a whiney and always has been. Just wanted to commiserate! Everything has to be done a certain way or its a tragedy and whining ensues

AmandaJLewis

EJ went through a whiney stage, and it comes back on occasion. I used to try to remind her that I didn't understand her when she whined and if she could talk normal I would listen.  When I was less patient, I would whine back at her in my whiney voice to demonstrate what she sounded like.

Meghan&Rich

Ditto Amanda.  I either ignore until they talk normal, or imitate them.  I've also gone into the bathroom or bedroom and locked the door for some space until they get their act together.

Although, the other day Mason asked me for something, and I told him no...he just responded "okay" and went about his business.  I didn't know what to do with myself, it kind of freaked me out, lol!

AmandaJLewis

i feel like the mimicking helps them understand what they actually sound like and how it is different from their normal voice. I feel there were days that EJ used the whine voice for everything she said. But me saying "stop whining" didn't always click because maybe she didn't know what whining was.

Luckystar2

The ignoring and mimicking never work for dd. I'll tell her I can't hear or understand her and she will just whine more...YES YOU CAN!!!! But I have locked myself in another room like Meghan has...that does seem to help stop whatever crazy behavior is going on.

MrsAmers

It seems to come and go in phases with our kids. DS is definitely worse in general, but both do it especially when they are tired. And DS has been sort of perpetually tired since he started Kindergarten. Some weeks are worse than others, but I feel like he just gets worse as the week goes on, then resets somewhat over the weekend. I would put him to bed earlier if I thought he would actually go to sleep.

No real advice. Just "please don't whine" over and over and over and over...

lala5507

MrsAmers said:

 And DS has been sort of perpetually tired since he started Kindergarten. Some weeks are worse than others, but I feel like he just gets worse as the week goes on, then resets somewhat over the weekend.

I feel like this is part of the problem.  All day kindergarten is exhausting!  I start to see her go down hill on Wednesday and by Friday, she's a train wreck. 

denalea

It makes me feel better to hear others have locked themselves away for a time.  I've been having to do that, too!  My "broken record" mantra has been "Momma is not going to talk to you/be around you when you talk like that/act like that." and then I walk away and shut a door.
 
Or I say "You cannot act like that just because you get an answer that you don't like."  (i.e. No.)   And walk away.

And then sometimes I completely loose my s**t an yell and scream and get totally mad and then feel bad about it for the rest of the day/night.  (I was less than gentle when putting S in the car seat the other night when we had to pick DH up from the car dealer, and S REFUSED to put his socks/shoes/coat on.  So, I made him walk across the cold driveway with no shoes.....not my proudest moment....)

It has occurred to me that perhaps S doesn't quite know what whining is, but I do think he knows he's pitching a fit/throwing a tantrum (which are our current main issues.)

lala5507

Thanks everybody for commiserating with me.  Hopefully it stops before she goes off the college 

MrsAmers

If I had a nickel for every time one of my kids whined "I'm huuuuunnnnnngryyyyy" this weekend, I could take myself out for a really fancy dinner with an expensive bottle of wine. Ugh.

I solo parented most of the weekend. I felt bad, but when DH returned last night I had ZERO desire to talk to anyone.

egpitt22

I swear, my kids are hungry every.five.minutes.  It drives me out of my mind.  I don't understand where they store all that food!!  The whining that goes along with the "hunger"??  Unbearably annoying.

Luckystar2

egpitt22 said:

I swear, my kids are hungry every.five.minutes.  It drives me out of my mind.  I don't understand where they store all that food!!  The whining that goes along with the "hunger"??  Unbearably annoying.

I know!!! Dd too! I seriously want to scream everyday having to hear how hungry she is! She gets a big lunch and a snack at after school but as soon as we get in the car I hear it. And really what do you expect me to do about it?! I'm not bringing food for our 10 minute car ride home and you know you can eat fruit or yogurt when we get home. Yet I still have to hear whining about it!

MrsAmers

We drove to and from Dayton this weekend. Some of it was clearly just boredom in the car because as soon as we stopped for food (earlier than planned) they did not eat like they were starving. So annoying.

And some of it was because the girl is so picky. There was a to. Of food at the family reunion, but not a lot that she was willing to eat. Not my fault. And no, you can't just have more cookies!

MrsAmers

That should be "ton of food".

Stupid autocorrect.

lala5507

MrsAmers said:

 And some of it was because the girl is so picky. There was a to. Of food at the family reunion, but not a lot that she was willing to eat. Not my fault. And no, you can't just have more cookies!

Ugh, I hate that!  My family is always like, "aw just let her have a cookie".  Um no, if she was really sooooo hungry, she could each the dinner.