9 to 5
housewifehobbyist
member
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Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
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Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Sleeping with the enemy
in 9 to 5
I think I already know the answer to it, but its still hard so I wouldn't mind some outside voices to contribute to my (loudly conflicting) inner thoughts.
I've worked for my current company for six years now. Three years ago there was a big, messy, acrimonious split between partners. I stayed with Partner A's company, even after being offered a spot with Partner B. The business was good, the work environment was great and social, and I became one of the top people in the small company. Partner A takes things very personally, really to an unprofessional level, but for example business started to be very NOT good and my salary was cut by a third. He paid out of pocket ($2,000) for me to get a professional certification I wanted to study for. He's also had really nasty situations where someone messes up or resigns and he starts screaming horrible things at them because he can't separate professional slights from personal ones.
There have been some rumors about my company being sold recently, and I've been accidentally privy to emails (he didn't seem to realize I would read the whole chain where he said we may be closed by the end of March) that basically confirm it. Partner A keeps denying it, but its pretty clear which way the wind is blowing.
Partner B heard the rumors too, and offered me a position at their company, which seems to be thriving. Its not where I want to be in the long run (I'd like to go more corporate as H and I buy a house and start a family), but I know the job market is tough right now, and its always easier to get a job when you already have one. Better to be employed six months in a job that isn't ideal while hunting down a better fit than unemployed searching for the perfect one right?
I'm so very non confrontational, and I hate to mess up a reference from the company I've spent the last three years with, but I think I may make this move. My big scaredy-cat problem is if I tell Partner A I'm giving my two weeks and moving to Partner B he WILL freak out and be horrible and almost definitely fire me on the spot. If I give my two weeks and he finds out from someone else where I'm going/have gone he will get very vindictive and try to blackball me. Literally one time he hired his best friend to manage one of our places and friend got frustrated and quit and Partner A still won't speak to him two years later. Its very high school.
I've been looking for a new position for about six weeks now and I've had an offer (I felt the position was above my skill set so I declined) and a few good interviews, but I realize it can take months to find the right job. I just got a decline from a job I was REALLY hoping for so I'm a little depressed about that. Right now I don't know if I have months or weeks at my current company, and I'm afraid of passing up this opportunity and then getting laid off with the rest of the company in a month and screwing myself over for the sake of company loyalty. I'm trying to get it through my thick skull that my loyalty needs to be to my family first, not my boss.
Being an adult is hard.
I've worked for my current company for six years now. Three years ago there was a big, messy, acrimonious split between partners. I stayed with Partner A's company, even after being offered a spot with Partner B. The business was good, the work environment was great and social, and I became one of the top people in the small company. Partner A takes things very personally, really to an unprofessional level, but for example business started to be very NOT good and my salary was cut by a third. He paid out of pocket ($2,000) for me to get a professional certification I wanted to study for. He's also had really nasty situations where someone messes up or resigns and he starts screaming horrible things at them because he can't separate professional slights from personal ones.
There have been some rumors about my company being sold recently, and I've been accidentally privy to emails (he didn't seem to realize I would read the whole chain where he said we may be closed by the end of March) that basically confirm it. Partner A keeps denying it, but its pretty clear which way the wind is blowing.
Partner B heard the rumors too, and offered me a position at their company, which seems to be thriving. Its not where I want to be in the long run (I'd like to go more corporate as H and I buy a house and start a family), but I know the job market is tough right now, and its always easier to get a job when you already have one. Better to be employed six months in a job that isn't ideal while hunting down a better fit than unemployed searching for the perfect one right?
I'm so very non confrontational, and I hate to mess up a reference from the company I've spent the last three years with, but I think I may make this move. My big scaredy-cat problem is if I tell Partner A I'm giving my two weeks and moving to Partner B he WILL freak out and be horrible and almost definitely fire me on the spot. If I give my two weeks and he finds out from someone else where I'm going/have gone he will get very vindictive and try to blackball me. Literally one time he hired his best friend to manage one of our places and friend got frustrated and quit and Partner A still won't speak to him two years later. Its very high school.
I've been looking for a new position for about six weeks now and I've had an offer (I felt the position was above my skill set so I declined) and a few good interviews, but I realize it can take months to find the right job. I just got a decline from a job I was REALLY hoping for so I'm a little depressed about that. Right now I don't know if I have months or weeks at my current company, and I'm afraid of passing up this opportunity and then getting laid off with the rest of the company in a month and screwing myself over for the sake of company loyalty. I'm trying to get it through my thick skull that my loyalty needs to be to my family first, not my boss.
Being an adult is hard.
Re: Sleeping with the enemy
Honestly if you are unsure of your future at your current company I would take the job. As for your boss being vindictive don't tell him where your new position is. He does not need to know but also to be careful that you do not tell anyone else either. If he finds out there is really nothing you can do, but just say you found a position within another company that fits into your life better at this time.
Also the company you are currently working for does not seem to have a healthy environment at all. It seems quite destructive, I would get out of there as fast as I could.
You definitely need to get out of there! You already know the company is folding. Unfortunately, it sounds like there is no getting around him being a jerk about it. You're fortunate to have somewhere to jump off to...even if it is not a job you want for the long term. Nothing wrong with hanging out there until the economy improves. Plus then, assuming Partner B is not a loon like Partner A, you can move on to another job 1-2 years from now with a good reference. Partner A's reference as a previous boss...if he is even called at all...really wouldn't matter much.
Funny story, I had a crazy volatile boss like that a few years ago. Although he was never Jekyll/Hyde...just Hyde. I walked in one day to give him my two-week notice...had my letter typed up and everything...in his irrational anger, he screams at me that I am fired and to get out. Fantastic! I kept my little letter with me...had not given it to him yet...and filed for unemployment a few days later, which of course I would not have been entitled to if I had just quit like I planned. And found a much better job in less than a month anyway...but that was when the job market was booming.
I was planning on clearing out my things this weekend, so if I give him my notice next week I'm prepared to get up, grab my purse and coat, and just walk out if he gets nasty. I get an email this morning that we lost the lease on our office so next week we're moving operations down to the basements of our venues into a renovated locker room that is being sprayed for bed bugs this week.... I think I made the right call here. Hopefully I can get this all done Monday and just wash my hands of this whole thing.
Oh good! I'm glad to hear it. I think it sometimes helps to picture the absolute worse, because it rarely happens, and then it's a relief when things go much better than expected.
Congratulations and I hope you really enjoy your new job.