Most expensive gift you have bought your SO?

hoffse

Hi MM-ers, I'm on the fence about something.

H and I intentionally over-withheld on our taxes this year because we weren't positive if my LLM reimbursements were going to be taxed.  I was pretty sure they shouldn't be, but I couldn't get anybody to give me a straight answer on it.

Anyway, they weren't taxed (sweet), and the result is that we have the biggest refund ever coming to us this year.  We didn't budget for it when planning our 2016 goals, so I think we're just going to stick it in savings for now.

I'm thinking of using a little bit of it to buy H a piece of furniture for his birthday/Christmas at the end of the year.  We found a 1920's standing desk from an old print shop at an antique store near my parents' house several months ago.  He absolutely loved that thing, and he is still talking about how cool it was (I agree).  We didn't buy it then because we weren't sure about our tax situation at that time.  

I had my mom do some recon for me last week, and it's still in the shop.  The dealer said she would take $400 for it, and my parents offered to pick it up/store it until I'm ready to give it to him.

My H would absolutely not notice if I sent $400 to my parents to pay them back for the desk.  I know he would love it.  But I've never spent that much on a gift for him before.... and actually, I don't think I've spent that much period without talking to him first.

 What does MM think?  What's the most expensive surprise gift you've bought your SO?

als1982

Birthdays are the only time we buy each other gifts. And we usually go pretty big. Last year I surprised him with plane tickets and travel accommodations to visit his best friend from grad school. For my last birthday, he bought me an Apple Watch. That said, we don't do Christmas, anniversaries, Valentine's Day, etc. so that's it for the year.

AprilZ81

Since it is you and you guys have your finances well under control I would say go for it as long as you don't think he will feel guilty that he didn't spend as much on you for your birthday.

It is a unique piece and you know he loves it and you like/love it as well.

Xstatic3333

I would do it, too. What a sweet idea!

To answer the original question, the most I ever spent was around $450 for a piece of dive equipment. But, it wasn't a surprise. He helped pick it out, which is common for us.

julieanne912

We don't really do expensive gifts... I think our first year together I spent around $150 total on some baseball tickets for his birthday, but that's still when we were together less than a year and trying to impress each other haha!

But, that being said, some of that is because of my financial situation... I honestly don't think a $400 piece of furniture is crazy at all for a gift, especially since you can definitely afford it.  I thought you were gonna say it's like 3 grand or something like that.  

hoffse

AprilZ81 said:

Since it is you and you guys have your finances well under control I would say go for it as long as you don't think he will feel guilty that he didn't spend as much on you for your birthday.

It is a unique piece and you know he loves it and you like/love it as well.

Yeah, I don't care if he buys me anything for my birthday.  We didn't do gifts for our anniversary, birthdays, or Christmas last year because we were spending so much on the house.  We've never celebrated Valentine's day, other than making each other cards.

This is pretty frivolous, and that's why I sort of feel like it has to be tied to a special occasion. 

His birthday is a couple months before mine, so I guess I could always give him a similar budget if he really wants it to be equivalent.  But I mean, I really don't care.  I'm probably getting a piano at some point this year - either the one at his grandma's house or one locally - and that will be more than an adequate for all gift-giving occasions as far as I'm concerned.  

kmurphy2131

I would go for it If I were you.  I have not spent that much on my husband, but if the circumstances were right I absolutely would. The circumstances being were financially under control in all other aspects.  Based on everything you have posted, I would say you guys have your finances well under control.

I know you have mentioned that you were trying to loosen up a bit with the budget because he thought you were being too tight with it.  If that is correct, I think that in some ways this gift could show that you are hearing what he was saying.  If I am wrong about that, sorry.  I hope I am remembering correct. 

hoffse

als1982 said:

Birthdays are the only time we buy each other gifts. And we usually go pretty big. Last year I surprised him with plane tickets and travel accommodations to visit his best friend from grad school. For my last birthday, he bought me an Apple Watch. That said, we don't do Christmas, anniversaries, Valentine's Day, etc. so that's it for the year.

I like this approach, and it might be a good groove to get into now that we are past the big house remodeling.

We do usually go out to dinner for our anniversary, but gifts have been really sporadic (or nonexistent) and budget-driven the past few years.  It would be good to establish something like what you guys do.  I think we would each prefer one nicer gift than several smaller ones.

hoffse

kmurphy2131 said:

I would go for it If I were you.  I have not spent that much on my husband, but if the circumstances were right I absolutely would. The circumstances being were financially under control in all other aspects.  Based on everything you have posted, I would say you guys have your finances well under control.

I know you have mentioned that you were trying to loosen up a bit with the budget because he thought you were being too tight with it.  If that is correct, I think that in some ways this gift could show that you are hearing what he was saying.  If I am wrong about that, sorry.  I hope I am remembering correct. 

You're not wrong at all, and that's a really good point.

I think that's the very thing holding me back, actually!  That stupid stranglehold I have on our money.... sigh.

CuriousKiddosMama

I would totally go for it! It's something you both like- so that's a major win. It's unique, which I live in furniture. And it's not horribly outrageous.

The most expensive thing I've done for dh was to send him on a hog hunt for his Christmas present. It was $500 plus he needed some new gear. It was something he had been wanting to do for a while. I squirreled some of it out of the budget without him noticing, and I think I paid for a bit of it by selling crap around the house or something. I don't remember exactly, but I was happy I was able to pay for it without him noticing immediately.

vlagrl29

Didn't read all responses but if you have the money go for it. I've never spent more than $100 on dh but if I had more I would.

dragonstarjk

julieanne912 said:

We don't really do expensive gifts... I think our first year together I spent around $150 total on some baseball tickets for his birthday, but that's still when we were together less than a year and trying to impress each other haha!

But, that being said, some of that is because of my financial situation... I honestly don't think a $400 piece of furniture is crazy at all for a gift, especially since you can definitely afford it.  I thought you were gonna say it's like 3 grand or something like that.  

Haha, this is what I was thinking too.  I'm thinking the most I've spent on a gift for H is probably $400-500.  I can't really remember.  I have actually been thinking I'd love to gift him a special hunting trip when he turns 50 in a couple years, and that would be several thousand.  Depends if I can save up for it.  H has definitely given me several more expensive gifts (Roomba, new computer, anniversary necklace, log bed, etc.)  We are pretty random with gifts--some years and occasions we go all out, and some years/occasions we do very little.  We just try to be 'in the moment' about it, I guess.  If it's in the budget and it's something one of us really thinks the other would like and appreciate, we go for it.

Mustard76

I would totally do it.

1. You know he loves it.
2. You're going to have money in the budget you weren't planning on having.
3. The rest of your financial house is in order.
4. $400 isn't a crazy amount of money.

To answer your question, a few years ago I bough H a $350 cooler. Yes, a cooler. Yikes, I don't want to talk about it. Haha.

dragonstarjk

Mustard76 said:

I would totally do it. 1. You know he loves it. 2. You're going to have money in the budget you weren't planning on having. 3. The rest of your financial house is in order. 4. $400 isn't a crazy amount of money. To answer your question, a few years ago I bough H a $350 cooler. Yes, a cooler. Yikes, I don't want to talk about it. Haha.

Was it a Yeti?

JoanE2012

I would go for it!  $400 seems pretty reasonable for a piece of furniture.  I've been eyeing a chair/ottoman at Pottery Barn that goes for around $2,200! 

To your question, I think the most I've spent is $600 or so, but we rarely exchange big gifts anymore.  I'd rather have new garage doors than a piece of jewelry.  

Mustard76

dragonstarjk said:

Mustard76 said:

I would totally do it.

1. You know he loves it.
2. You're going to have money in the budget you weren't planning on having.
3. The rest of your financial house is in order.
4. $400 isn't a crazy amount of money.

To answer your question, a few years ago I bough H a $350 cooler. Yes, a cooler. Yikes, I don't want to talk about it. Haha.

Was it a Yeti?


It is a Yeti! H doesn't ever want for anything. Everything he ever wants, he saves his allowance and he buys it. The stupid Yeti is the only thing he has ever wanted that he didn't buy himself. I loved getting it for him for that reason, but I almost fell over when I bought it.

PurpleBookmark

I think you should go for it!

The most expensive thing I ever bought DH was a $150 mandolin when we were dating. No, he doesn't play lol.

dragonstarjk

JoanE2012 said:

I would go for it!  $400 seems pretty reasonable for a piece of furniture.  I've been eyeing a chair/ottoman at Pottery Barn that goes for around $2,200! 

To your question, I think the most I've spent is $600 or so, but we rarely exchange big gifts anymore.  I'd rather have new garage doors than a piece of jewelry.  

For Christmas one year, H totally got me a new garage door and opener.  Our garage was unusable to park in because the door we bought the house with was practically falling apart and didn't have an opener.  I still remind him every winter when I don't have to unbury my car from the snow that it was one of the smartest gifts he ever gave me

abrewer5

I also say go for it! It sounds like you both love the piece and it would be a great gift!

I spend way too much on H's gifts. I really just love to buy people things they love, especially H. I think the most I ever spent was either his xbox360 or his Wii plus games. I can't remember how much they came out to, but they were bought separate years.

Erikan73

I would do it, it's something that he loves and it sounds like you like it too. It's a piece that you will have in your home and use and enjoy for years and years to come. One Christmas I spent a pretty penny on a photo that I knew my husband loved and had it framed. I was ok with it as I had been saving up for that gift and it's hanging on our living room wall for both of us to enjoy every day.

brij2006

I say do it.

But I wouldn't wait to give it to him until Christmas/end of the year.  Just so you don't have to worry about it coming up in discussion again after you receive your tax return and he asks or talks about spending some of it on that desk.  I would just buy it and have your parents put it in the house for you while he's at work.  See if/when he notices.  Then tell him merry early Christmas.

cbee817

I would buy it for sure- it seems like a great piece and I'm sure your DH would be really surprised and happy. 

I love to spoil DH with gifts- things I know he would never buy himself... even if it's something small. That's toned down quite a bit since we have kids, but the day after we got engaged, I bought him a tag heuer watch that he wanted. He wears it every day so it makes me happy that I got it for him and it's well loved. After DD#2 was born, DH got me a pair of Tiffany diamond earrings that I wanted for a long time- I wear them every day too! 

jessica490

I say go for it as well...you will have it for years to come!

I don't even remember the most $ gift I've ever given H....it probably would've been between $100-$200 dollars max....but now we don't really buy each other gifts, we buy joint gifts for the house.

KatieCutie05

If you have the money, then do it.

DH has probably spent 300 on me at one time. before we got married - he'd frequently buy me gifts that were over 200. He has never had any problem spending money. lol. I can't recall any time i spent more then 150 total on all his christmas gifts. but usually its been under 100. Although i have a sneaky way of buying him big gifts that are worth more - for less so i don't feel as guilty. Only problem is he's figured me out by now so he almost expects it. 

julieanne912

dragonstarjk said:

Mustard76 said:

I would totally do it. 1. You know he loves it. 2. You're going to have money in the budget you weren't planning on having. 3. The rest of your financial house is in order. 4. $400 isn't a crazy amount of money. To answer your question, a few years ago I bough H a $350 cooler. Yes, a cooler. Yikes, I don't want to talk about it. Haha.

Was it a Yeti?

Bahaha I thought the exact same thing when I read $350 cooler.

They really are worth it though, we have 3 in various sizes, plus the tub, and the soft side bag.  And the tumblers.  H is obsessed.  He buys them with the Cabela's card points he racks up with his business travel.

Side note on Yetis... we were out in Grand Junction last summer for Country Jam.  It was 100 degrees every day.  We filled up our biggest Yeti on a Tuesday with ice (both block and cubes) and drinks, and had it in the "garage" area of our toy hauler, which had a broken AC.  We finally emptied it on the following Wednesday, after getting back from our trip (so 8 days) and the ice blocks were only halfway melted. 

Xstatic3333

julieanne912 said:

dragonstarjk said:

Mustard76 said:

I would totally do it.

1. You know he loves it.
2. You're going to have money in the budget you weren't planning on having.
3. The rest of your financial house is in order.
4. $400 isn't a crazy amount of money.

To answer your question, a few years ago I bough H a $350 cooler. Yes, a cooler. Yikes, I don't want to talk about it. Haha.

Was it a Yeti?

Bahaha I thought the exact same thing when I read $350 cooler.

They really are worth it though, we have 3 in various sizes, plus the tub, and the soft side bag.  And the tumblers.  H is obsessed.  He buys them with the Cabela's card points he racks up with his business travel.

Side note on Yetis... we were out in Grand Junction last summer for Country Jam.  It was 100 degrees every day.  We filled up our biggest Yeti on a Tuesday with ice (both block and cubes) and drinks, and had it in the "garage" area of our toy hauler, which had a broken AC.  We finally emptied it on the following Wednesday, after getting back from our trip (so 8 days) and the ice blocks were only halfway melted. 

Just looked up the Yeti, and it seems pretty awesome. Probably not an imminent purchase but I'd love that for camping. I worry a lot about food safety with our milk/eggs/meat.

julieanne912

Xstatic3333 said:

dragonstarjk said:

Mustard76 said:

I would totally do it. 1. You know he loves it. 2. You're going to have money in the budget you weren't planning on having. 3. The rest of your financial house is in order. 4. $400 isn't a crazy amount of money. To answer your question, a few years ago I bough H a $350 cooler. Yes, a cooler. Yikes, I don't want to talk about it. Haha.

Was it a Yeti?

Bahaha I thought the exact same thing when I read $350 cooler.

They really are worth it though, we have 3 in various sizes, plus the tub, and the soft side bag.  And the tumblers.  H is obsessed.  He buys them with the Cabela's card points he racks up with his business travel.

Side note on Yetis... we were out in Grand Junction last summer for Country Jam.  It was 100 degrees every day.  We filled up our biggest Yeti on a Tuesday with ice (both block and cubes) and drinks, and had it in the "garage" area of our toy hauler, which had a broken AC.  We finally emptied it on the following Wednesday, after getting back from our trip (so 8 days) and the ice blocks were only halfway melted. 

Just looked up the Yeti, and it seems pretty awesome. Probably not an imminent purchase but I'd love that for camping. I worry a lot about food safety with our milk/eggs/meat.

Yeah they're pretty great.  But until then, you know you can freeze your milk ahead of time (just empty/drink a little off the top before freezing) and then let it defrost in your regular cooler... it usually defrosts just enough to drink each day, and it helps to keep the other stuff cold.  Also eggs don't even need to be kept cold at all (especially if you're using them all quickly), that's just something we do here in the US.  

dragonstarjk

julieanne912 said:

dragonstarjk said:

Mustard76 said:

I would totally do it. 1. You know he loves it. 2. You're going to have money in the budget you weren't planning on having. 3. The rest of your financial house is in order. 4. $400 isn't a crazy amount of money. To answer your question, a few years ago I bough H a $350 cooler. Yes, a cooler. Yikes, I don't want to talk about it. Haha.

Was it a Yeti?

Bahaha I thought the exact same thing when I read $350 cooler.

They really are worth it though, we have 3 in various sizes, plus the tub, and the soft side bag.  And the tumblers.  H is obsessed.  He buys them with the Cabela's card points he racks up with his business travel.

Side note on Yetis... we were out in Grand Junction last summer for Country Jam.  It was 100 degrees every day.  We filled up our biggest Yeti on a Tuesday with ice (both block and cubes) and drinks, and had it in the "garage" area of our toy hauler, which had a broken AC.  We finally emptied it on the following Wednesday, after getting back from our trip (so 8 days) and the ice blocks were only halfway melted. 

I really want the soft side!  Just haven't been able to bring myself to pay for it.  H would probably love to get a big one for hunting but again, haven't been able to stomach the cost yet.  Maybe someday!

Stephanie2167

I would do it. $400 is a lot of money but it's not like "hey honey. I bought you this thing for $1000. Hope you like it."

julieanne912

dragonstarjk said:

julieanne912 said:

dragonstarjk said:

Mustard76 said:

I would totally do it. 1. You know he loves it. 2. You're going to have money in the budget you weren't planning on having. 3. The rest of your financial house is in order. 4. $400 isn't a crazy amount of money. To answer your question, a few years ago I bough H a $350 cooler. Yes, a cooler. Yikes, I don't want to talk about it. Haha.

Was it a Yeti?

Bahaha I thought the exact same thing when I read $350 cooler.

They really are worth it though, we have 3 in various sizes, plus the tub, and the soft side bag.  And the tumblers.  H is obsessed.  He buys them with the Cabela's card points he racks up with his business travel.

Side note on Yetis... we were out in Grand Junction last summer for Country Jam.  It was 100 degrees every day.  We filled up our biggest Yeti on a Tuesday with ice (both block and cubes) and drinks, and had it in the "garage" area of our toy hauler, which had a broken AC.  We finally emptied it on the following Wednesday, after getting back from our trip (so 8 days) and the ice blocks were only halfway melted. 

I really want the soft side!  Just haven't been able to bring myself to pay for it.  H would probably love to get a big one for hunting but again, haven't been able to stomach the cost yet.  Maybe someday!

Yeah it's much easier to stomach when it's just being paid for with points versus actual money.  I think he's only paid for one of them (the first one) with actual money, when he had a 20% off coupon.  

The soft side we have is the larger one, and then when we were at REI I saw the smaller one and I was like "oooooo", but no.  My only complaint about the soft side is that they are actually kind of hard to open up... they're designed that way to be waterproof but you can just unzip it real quick to grab a beer or whatever, you have to put some effort into it.  

abrewer5

julieanne912 said:

dragonstarjk said:

julieanne912 said:

dragonstarjk said:

Mustard76 said:

I would totally do it. 1. You know he loves it. 2. You're going to have money in the budget you weren't planning on having. 3. The rest of your financial house is in order. 4. $400 isn't a crazy amount of money. To answer your question, a few years ago I bough H a $350 cooler. Yes, a cooler. Yikes, I don't want to talk about it. Haha.

Was it a Yeti?

Bahaha I thought the exact same thing when I read $350 cooler.

They really are worth it though, we have 3 in various sizes, plus the tub, and the soft side bag.  And the tumblers.  H is obsessed.  He buys them with the Cabela's card points he racks up with his business travel.

Side note on Yetis... we were out in Grand Junction last summer for Country Jam.  It was 100 degrees every day.  We filled up our biggest Yeti on a Tuesday with ice (both block and cubes) and drinks, and had it in the "garage" area of our toy hauler, which had a broken AC.  We finally emptied it on the following Wednesday, after getting back from our trip (so 8 days) and the ice blocks were only halfway melted. 

I really want the soft side!  Just haven't been able to bring myself to pay for it.  H would probably love to get a big one for hunting but again, haven't been able to stomach the cost yet.  Maybe someday!

Yeah it's much easier to stomach when it's just being paid for with points versus actual money.  I think he's only paid for one of them (the first one) with actual money, when he had a 20% off coupon.  

The soft side we have is the larger one, and then when we were at REI I saw the smaller one and I was like "oooooo", but no.  My only complaint about the soft side is that they are actually kind of hard to open up... they're designed that way to be waterproof but you can just unzip it real quick to grab a beer or whatever, you have to put some effort into it.  

I've never owned a yeti, but we have a horizon soft cooler that is pretty awesome and a lot cheaper. Their customer service has always been great too. Plus a life time guarantee against leaks. (I do not work for them and I hope this isn't against the rules, sorry if it is!!) Usually we can get 2 days out of the ice in the cooler when boating if we stay out. You may want to check them out if you're looking for a less expensive option! They have all sizes too. 

ETA: They're still expensive for a cooler, but not quite yeti expensive. lol