Central California Nesties
DH
and I are starting to think about TTC sometime next year, once the
housing market calms down and we buy a house. Here's the problem...DH
is starting his MBA this fall. He's going to be working full time and
going to school 4 hrs/2 nights a week year round. This will be for 2
years. My fear is that it will be extremely difficult trying to handle
a new baby with hardly any help from DH, especially when I'm back at
work from maternity leave. Being a SAHM won't be possible for at least
another 5 yrs, so that's out. None of our friends are in this position
atm, so we're looking to others for advice (yay for nesties)! Any
advice you could give me would be well appreciated, espeically from
those who are in a similar situation!!! TIA!!!
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Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
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Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Re: Baby advice re:DH in school
Do you have any family in the area? Really lean on friends and family. Maybe you could have them take turns coming over on the nights your DH is away.
I'm sure it will end up being much easier than you think it will. My DH is a football coach and often gone in the evenings.
Good luck!
My DH and I were married in '03 and he was working FT and doing 9 hours a week at a community college. Our daughter, who is almost 3 , was a honeymoon surprise. One that left us totally shocked and very scared.
My job at the time was as a PT youth minister at a church, and he was a FT waiter (worked M,W,F,Sa,Sun lunch and dinner) and was at the college 10-12 hours a week. I got lucky because my job allowed me to bring our daughter to work with me 18 out of 20 hours a week. But it was HARD.
When my daughter was about 8 months old, I left that job. We still needed some income from me, though, so I worked at a gym's childcare. I got to bring our daughter with me there, too, which was nice.
And then we moved on to tag-team parenting. By this point (when DD was 1.5) my husband was now going FT at the university and working FT at the college. And I got a job in a leasing office. So he would go to class, come home, I'd hand our daughter off, I'd go to work, come home, he'd head out to work, etc. NOT IDEAL.
When my daughter turned 2 I went back to work FT and he continued on FT at the restaurant and FT at the university. So all the family time we had together was Tu and Th nights and Saturday and Sunday until 4pm.
My DH graduated in May and it was the PROUDEST moment for me. I cried so hard I was so proud of him. It's HARD work to go to school, go to work, and have a baby. That's another thing to consider--not just how you'll feel about having another baby and having most of your time with the baby, but how a baby would affect the sleep and other things your husband will need.
I wouldn't trade it for the world but I had so many moments where I resented DH for not being able to help out more.
Now we're living a dream--he and I both work FT and we have nights and weekends together. It's a life that is so new to us.
It can be done, but I'm not sure I'd recommend it. I really think it's up to the individuals.