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Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
POLL about BFFs
just talking this over with some girlfriends lately. we're wondering if BFFs become less common as you grow up. (DH's are obviously our BFFs no matter what, I mean female relationships)
Do you have a BFF now?
Did you when you were younger?
Do you have just a BF, maybe not the been together forever part?
How much time do you spend with her?
If you don't, do you wish you did?
Re: POLL about BFFs
That said, I definately had a BFF in high school that I still maintain contact with, but we just have different values and ideas about how life should be lived now (mainly she rejects many things I hold dear, like marriage, children, etc).
In undergraduate I hung out with a group of guys, I was literally the only female. DH is of course one of them, and two of the others are still jointly definately very close to us. I have virtually no female friends in college.
I have close female friends now, but I would not call them my best friends. Maybe a year from now when we have known each other longer I will feel differently.
I had a different BFF every year when I was little, so I'll have to say no.
My BF lives in Cinci and works for a traveling puppet company, so we see each other when we can. He is often on the road. We call our guest room "Sean's room" and even call it that when we're giving tours of our house whenever someone new comes over. I probably see him about 3 days a month.
I wish we could spend some time or at least talk every week, but it just doesn't happen.
Did you when you were younger? Definitely--even as recently as college
Do you have just a BF, maybe not the been together forever part? Nope
How much time do you spend with her? None--the only person I would consider a BFF (besides DH) lives in Wisconsin and I haven't seen her since her wedding in August 2006
If you don't, do you wish you did? Absolutely. I would love to have someone local (or even not local...) that I could call a BFF.
There are four of us from college--sorority sisters
Did you when you were younger? yes--she is not my friend anymore though. she was in my wedding (in august) and right after that we had a falling out. among other things, she was supposed to house sit for us while we were on our HM, but she left 2 days early and did not pick us up from the airport. she also had a "guest" over while we were gone. it was some random guy and the only reason we found out was b/c there were condoms floating in the guest bathrm. toilet when we got home. gross!!!
Do you have just a BF, maybe not the been together forever part? yes--my 4 sorority sisters i mentioned in Q1.
How much time do you spend with her? i see them as often as possible, but we are all in different areas. one is in med school, on in chicago in grad school and the last one moving to philly w/her BF, soon to be FI, for new jobs.
If you don't, do you wish you did? if i could see them every day i would. i never laugh as hard and feel as understood as i do when i am with them. plus one of them introduced me to DH.
Did you when you were younger? Yes for almost 13 years
Do you have just a BF, maybe not the been together forever part? No
How much time do you spend with her? N/A
If you don't, do you wish you did? I wish my friend and I could work out our B.S. She used to have a lot of drama, and when I met DH I wanted to let go of all the drama. She backed out of being MOH at my wedding. We talk maybe once or twice a week. I miss my friend
Did you when you were younger? I had several, but none that I was her BFF and she was mine...never quite could get on the same page - LOL. Probably had a different closest girl friend every few years.
Do you have just a BF, maybe not the been together forever part? Not really. But I do have girl friends that I think will be a part of my life forever.
How much time do you spend with her? The person that I used to consider my BFF, we spent a ton of time together, including several fun vacations. Now that I'm married and she will be soon, it's less frequent. We've both made new friends, too.
If you don't, do you wish you did? Of course. DH is my best friend, but it feels weird to not have a female BFF.
Did you when you were younger? yes
Do you have just a BF, maybe not the been together forever part? My cureent BF I met about 5 years ago
How much time do you spend with her? We usually see each other once a week or every 2, and talk on the phone 3 times a week minimum.
Did you when you were younger? Oh yes, but we have grown apart. I still talk to a few of them, but not on a regular basis at all.
Do you have just a BF, maybe not the been together forever part? I have several friends that I consider really good friends, but maybe not BF's. Only because I don't spend the effort to hang out with them as much as I should.
How much time do you spend with her? Not enough with my friends. Once every few months or so.
If you don't, do you wish you did? Most definitely! I wish I had like a Sex in the City group where we all got together to gossip and talk over food and wine. I suppose I kind of have that with personal message boards with my friends, but it's not the same as actually getting together.
Did you when you were younger? Yes, I had a couple up until college ended, but we all went our seperate ways and I think of them more as just friends and a couple as BF.
Do you have just a BF, maybe not the been together forever part? Yes, I have about 5 BFs, but most of them live far away now and I don't see them that often
How much time do you spend with her? Not much, I see the out of towners probably 4x's a year or so if that. I have 2 in town that I see a couple times a month and try to talk to about once a week.
If you don't, do you wish you did? I could always use more friends!!!
I have a 2 Bffs, my sister and my best friend from High School.
I had several when I was younger
They're my BFFs
My sister lives in town, I talk to her every day and see her at least once or twice a week. My bff lives in Cincy and I see her as often as possible but talk to her almost every day. My sister and I are both close to her, we're both in her wedding in May!
Did you when you were younger? Yes.
Do you have just a BF, maybe not the been together forever part? Yup. We've been friends for 13 years and are neighbors.
How much time do you spend with her? Not enough. She has three kids and is always busy. I try to see her as much as I can.
If you don't, do you wish you did?
Did you when you were younger? not really...I had a BF that I grew up with in New York whom I'm sure I would have considered a BFF, but I moved away and we lost contact.
Do you have just a BF, maybe not the been together forever part? definitely! I have a small group of girlfriends who I would go to in a second if I needed something and I would drop pretty much everything to be at their side if they needed something. Two are friends from high school (even though we don't talk and see each other too often anymore, anytime we get together it's like nothing has changed); three are friends from college; and one is my sorority "big sis"
How much time do you spend with her? Well considering I live on the opposite side of the country now from those girls, I don't see them often. But we email, talk on the phone, leave messages on MySpace and Facebook, etc. I'm planning some trips this summer to see them and I know my one friend is planning a trip to Vegas in August.
If you don't, do you wish you did? I don't really know that I wish for a BFF, but I definitely hope to make some really good friends out here in Arizona.
Do you have a BFF now? Yes
Did you when you were younger? Yes...my 2 BFF's are twins. We have been best friends since 2nd grade.
3. Do you have just a BF? Yes...I have a few close girlfriends and a few guy friends who I consider my BFs
4. How much time do you spend with her/him? I see my 2 BFF's almost every weekend, if not more. I'll see Stephani a lot in recent days. She is getting married and I am helping her plan.
5. If you don't, do you wish you did? I don't know what I would do without my 2 BFF's.
My BFF Kristen has been my friend since 3rd grade and was elevated to the status of best friend in 8th grade. We've just grown closer every year.
I had a best friend named Lindsay for all of grade school and high school. We drifted apart a little when she met a boyfriend (now husband) that I didn't like and started using drugs. However, she's still one of my best friends, although not my VERY best friend, and we were in each other's weddings and everything.
Kristen lives in Philadelphia, so we only see each other twice a year, but we talk every week and email practically everyday. I see Lindsay multiple times each year, but she's not into phone and email. I don't think amount of time spent together matters as much as the quality time you do get to spend, and the acknowledgement of everyone that the friendship is important to them..
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Did you when you were younger? not since 4th grade
Do you have just a BF, maybe not the been together forever part? like someone else posted, ditto the "upper tier" long term friends but not BEST friends.
How much time do you spend with her? upper tier- see maybe once a month
If you don't, do you wish you did? i used to, sorely. anymore, its like an ideal thats just not for me. i'm getting tired of wanting something in a person that isn't being returned. i'm finding that i'm actually ok being on my own most of the time.
Yes ~ She rocks the Casbah!
Did you when you were younger?
Yes, I'm still good friends with my childhood best friend, there was a stretch of years where we weren't in contact, due to my step-mother. But thankfully my friend found me again.
Do you have just a BF, maybe not the been together forever part? We have not been friends forever, even though it feels like it. Only a few of my friends have been around the "forever", but they are guys and our relationship dynamic has changed a lot since when we were teenagers.
As for the girlsfriends I have now~It makes me glad to know our kids will grow up together and we'll all help each other though life's ups and downs. It's a really awesome feeling , especially since I don't have close family of my own.
How much time do you spend with her? Almost every week. It feels weird not to.
Well, forever would mean since childhood so I guess this is a no.
BF now: Yes, Wendy
BF then: Yes
I think I have several best friends actually. I see Wendy a few times a week b/c she lives down the street from me. When she moves, maybe once a week.
1.) I do have a BFF
2.) Yes, same BFF mentioned in #1
3.) My BFF are from the same home town and have been friends since we were babies (our parents were good friends).
4.) Unfortunately, we don't see each other much at all b/c we live 2 hours apt. and we both have DH's and kids. I try to see her every few months or so. We do talk on the phone once a week or so.
5.) Yes, I wish I could hang out with her every day...even if for only 10 minutes to say hi. I miss her!
Did you when you were younger? Yes, we grew apart and are located in different parts of the country and have different presents as opposed to the same past
Do you have just a BF, maybe not the been together forever part? not a BEST freind, aka single friend, I have a lot of friends through different sources that I spend small amounts of time with
How much time do you spend with her? Depends on what else is going on in life and such, usually see each other every few weeks, but talk/email more often
If you don't, do you wish you did? I do when i need a work out buddy, or to complain about the hubby or when i want to go see chick flicks, or go shopping!
Fortunely I have a lot of indivdual friends I can turn to for such stuff too tho
Did you when you were younger? Knew of her since elementary school, but didn't become friends until high school
Do you have just a BF, maybe not the been together forever part? For about 13 years now
How much time do you spend with her? Not much now. She moved to Arizona after college. But we keep in regular contact.
If you don't, do you wish you did? Nah, I think our friendship stays strong because of our time apart, if that makes any since.