Prioritizing Visiting Family

Manday

This weekend I have to choose between visiting my Grandma, who I see every few weeks normally but have not visited for a while, and my cousins' new baby, who is about a month old. If I don't go see the baby, I will not see her forever (maybe even until next Thanksgiving!!), but I also really feel guilty about how long its been since I saw my Grandma.

I have this paranoid morbid voice in my head that always tells me that every visit with Grandma may be the last and I shouldnt take it for granted I can just see her in a few weeks. I know. Incredibly morbid, especially considering she is ok health (no worsening conditions). I think its because I lost my Grandpa (her husband) so suddenly a few years ago, and had taken for granted I could see him "in a couple weeks" before he died.

So obviously I am leaning towards Grandma, am I being irrational? Does anyone else have these morbid thoughts?

Danica1

I always think that way when going to visit my mom so I understand.

BuksFan

If it makes you feel any better, I always think that way about having an opportunity to see my Grandpa.

triumphantreturnofplanningbug

I totally understand that nagging horrid voice.  My dad died in the middle of the workday when I was 17, and my grandfather died the day before we were supposed to go out to see him.  I worry about "will this be the last time I see someone?" every time I say goodbye.

BUT, I've had to teach myself that it could be the last time I see anyone, or anyone sees me, at any moment.  I don't know if that's more morbid, but for me it's really helped to remember that the precarity around death has always been there, and will always be there.  I may be hyperaware of it, but that doesn't actually make life any more urgent or scary than it was before, I'm just thinking about it differently.  Which totally doesn't help you make your decision, but is really all I can say.  Have fun with whichever you choose!

Mrs*Pink

Why can't you see the baby before next year?  If that's firm, I'd go see the baby and try to fit in Gma for another weekend.  This is this weekend right and not Thanksgiving?  If you're referring to T-giving, that might be a different story...

Manday

Its this weekend, not thanksgiving.

The baby's parents lives in Arkansas. They only come to OH 3-4 times a yr, and usually at Holidays while I am OOT. Its possible I would see her sooner, but it would be several monthes atleast.

Thanks everyone for the advice input. I decided to go to my Grandmas. That guilt/morbidity won out!