Any TN Foster Parents here?

olemiss_bride

Anyone who wants to share experiences about being a foster parent (good or bad and lessons learned) can post here or email me. ( bingophotography@gmail.com )

Hubby and I have been talking about applying for a while.  We have read over all the materials provided by the state and we think we are ready to do it.  I know it won't be easy, but we think we could do a good job. We have no children, extra room in our house, flexible schedules, and willing hearts.

 I have a bachelor's of science degree in marriage and family counseling, child development (plus enough social work credits for a minor in sw, I just didn't do the electives); plus about 12 years of experience with children (I always babysat as a teen, was a camp counselor for 5 years (two of those summers were at a camp for kids in the foster care system), a nanny for 4 years in college and I have worked for two preschools)- so I have a decent understanding of the emotional, physical, and mental needs of a foster child.  The state also provides a 30-hour training course for foster parents that we could do together.

So please share in any way you feel comfortable!

Thanks!
Bing

TarHeels&Rebels

Hey sweetie!  I don't have any advice, but it's wonderful that you and DH are thinking of this!

olemiss_bride

Thanks Diana!  I have always wanted to do it, but I always thought it would be later in life.. DH brought it up out of the blue a few weeks ago at dinner.  We have been talking about it and researching and praying every since.

I'll let you and all our MS knotties know when I know something.  We just called for our application packet today!
Bing

Jcepk1

I work with children who are abused here in TN and I have to tell you that healthy homes are so needed for displaced children.  That being said, I know it is not something I could personally handle emotionally.  I have one small concern from your post and that was your educational background.  When we work with children who have gone through some kind of trauma, the last thing we try to do is analyze the child or try to solve the child's problems.  Most times the child is seeing a therapist who will do that.  I think the most important thing you can do is provide an atmosphere where the child can be a child.  If you can use your educational background just to provide a healthy living environment and guidance for the child, I think it would be best.  I'm sure you and your husband would be a wonderful addition to the foster care community in the state... a welcome addition as well!

amykevin

I totally agree with the pp. I am adopted myself....and my parents were foster parents while I was growing up. We had 5 foster kids come through while I was growing up. They were really really good at it.....and they did NOT have the educational background. You have to be supportive & loving. The kids will be very rough around the edges with a lot of baggage....you just have to love them no matter what. I grew up in this, so I know first hand. My older sister was also a foster parent for awhile. She & her best friend ran a group home where they lived. They had 6 teenage girls. They were all pretty messed up & rebellious! Those girls would try & put them through the ringer. So....really I think the education will only get you so far. So....I am just saying from first-hand experience & growing up in the system....it is a lot to take on, it is not easy & is not something for most people. Just pray about it & think long & hard about it!

olemiss_bride

Thanks everyone!

No worries... I have absolutely NO intentions of trying to counsel or "fix" a child, no matter what my educational background is.  I only even mentioned it in my post because it is what made me what to do this in the first place.  (My husband approached me seperately about it.)  Hearing all the stories about the good and bad side of the foster care system in my classes... understanding that these kiddos have been through hell... made me want to be a good foster parent.

I do understand that reading about something in a book and then actually doing it are two very very different things.  We are prepared for the fact that there will be suprises and challenges that we did not anticipate.  We are certainly not entering into this lightly.

Unconditional love and support are the most important.. I totally agree.  We can't wait to have  the chance to give that to a child.

Thanks again for the stories and advice.
Bing