Clicky Poll: Donor Options

Two*True

Sorry for making baby day two days running but I need opinions.  I know K and I will choose which feels right for us but I think outsider opinions would help at the moment. Am I over thinking things?

At the moment there are two donors I (we) really like.  Let's pretend all things are equal (cost, medical history, profile etc) which of the two would you pick?

#1 - has reported pregnancies (plus 2 kids of his own), and the bank that he is at allows less offspring.

#2 - no reported pregnancies yet (he's a newer donor), but the bank that he is at allows a lot of offspring.

[Poll]

ctbride08

The big question here is if you want more than one child and if you do, is it important that they be from the same donor? While there is a chance that he would be discontinued while your TTCing your first, there is a greater chance that he would be done by your second.

Two*True

We'll most likely buy 3-6 months up front and then try to keep at least a 6 month supply in storage.  So if we buy 6 and are still trying in cycle 4, we'll buy another 4 to always have 6.  Make sense? And with both banks, as long as it's in storage we can continue to use it regardless of whether the donor has met his max # of offspring.  So I guess the simple answer is no, I'm not too worried about running out of either. 

2brides

I still find it really odd that my kids have 40+ (and potentially more) 1/2 siblings. In my mind they are their each others only sibs.  I didn't think it would be a bid deal pre-kids but now it kind of bothers me.

ctbride08

that definitely confirms my choice of known pregancies.  And i'm sure you've thought about it, but it might be a good idea to get the fewer number of vials up front....6 is a lot for someone who may or may not work for you.

Mrs._F

Since you're going to store for baby #2 and can use the stored sperm no matter what, I'd probably take the reported pregnancies, fewer siblings allowed guy.

Exciting that you've got it down to 2!!

Two*True

Mrs._F:

Exciting that you've got it down to 2!!

I'm not searching anymore! ::folds arms over chest::  I'm going to make K choose between these two.  They both have many of the qualities we are looking for.  And although neither is ID consent, which bums me out, both look like they could fit into K's family easily.  So we'll track down a few more details about them but hopefully we'll have a winner by next week! 

thiswillbe

I voted for #1 (reported pregnancies, fewer offspring) because availability of sperm for future children doesn't seem to be an issue for you.

That said, the one thing that might make me shy away from #1 would be if he seems a lot older than #2. I know there's not much research out on it yet*, but I get a little worried about sperm from an older donor. Of the two final contenders we had, we chose the one with no reported pregnancies/new to program over the longer in program/reported pregnancies/kids of his own donor. Mostly this was about a better phenotypic match to Sylvia of the newer donor, but our guess about their ages did play in to the decision a little bit.

*Just in case you want to obsess like we did ,  here's a link:
http://today.msnbc.msn.com/id/30035348/ 

2brides

I also want to toss out there to not to try to get too attached to donors if you can help it.  We went through 4 donors during 9 insem.  We tried most of them 2-3 times with no luck - the last one we tried, we got pregnant the first try.  He had a MUCH higher post-thaw sperm count than any of the others. Something there is no way of knowing beforehand.

Two*True

2brides:

I also want to toss out there to not to try to get too attached to donors if you can help it.  We went through 4 donors during 9 insem.  We tried most of them 2-3 times with no luck - the last one we tried, we got pregnant the first try.  He had a MUCH higher post-thaw sperm count than any of the others. Something there is no way of knowing beforehand.

Agreed.  Because of K's ethnic make up we are already limited to a small pool.  Then I took out all cmv+ donors (b/c I'm -) and the pool dwindled.  I'll try to think of this as more of a choice #1 and choice #2, the designated hitter should #1 get injured - lol!

2brides

I totally understand the lack of donors. We were looking for a blond hair/blue eyed donor (L's coloring) - easy, right?  Nope. We had our choice of 2-3 per month. Sigh.

And I ended up with light brown haired brown eyed kid and one blond haired green eyed kid. 

ssg73

we went with a donor who had many offspring.  We decied to use proven good swimmers to increase or chances of getting pregnant.  The donor is or will be soon "retired" from the program due to # of offspring.  I believe that we can request to have him reactivated for siblings.  I also know that there are several vials available on the donor sibling registry.

As for having many 1/2 genetic siblings.  It is strange to me.  We are not interested in developing relationships with the donor siblings as we raise our child(ren) but if it is important to our child(ren) as young adults I have no problem with them trying to contact their genetic 1/2 siblings.  Since genetics don't make a family I don't believe that they need those connections as they are growing up to feel whole. 

Duchess1

We went through 4 donors, you just never know what may work. We were advised to go with reported pregnancies when choosing. You may also be able to call the bank and ask what their post-thaw numbers are and decide that way.

thiswillbe

Do you know how long the newer donor has been available for purchase? (I wonder what the average time-till-1st-reported-pregnancy is. Hmmm...)

I am intrigued that the poll is so close...

ctbride08

thiswillbe:

Do you know how long the newer donor has been available for purchase? (I wonder what the average time-till-1st-reported-pregnancy is. Hmmm...)

I am intrigued that the poll is so close...

i cant answer for J, but when we first started looking about 3 months ago, our top choice was a brand new donor w/ no reported pregnancies....yesterday when I talked to the bank, he's got 3 reported pregnancies - so in that case it seemed to happen very quickly!