Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Wow...I feel like a huge weight has been lifted!
I have been really feeling like I'm losing my mind lately w/ Anthony and the aggression towards me.
I decided today that I need professional help w/ my family dynamic. Not my marriage, but the relationship between myself, MIL, DH and son.
After a terrible morning and afternoon w/ Anthony I decided to call our Employee Assistance line to speak to a therapist and maybe get the name of a Family therapist. Well, they connected me w/ a woman who's been a family therapist for 27 years and works primarily w/ families w/ young children.
I told her all the things lately w/ the physical aggression and the fact that every time I try to discipline in front of MIL she says things like "Oh, is Mommy being mean" or laughing when he hits me or something. She told me that her actions are ABSOLUTELY influencing his behavior.
She also told me that he can sense the changes coming w/ the new baby, and that it is normal for him to be angry about this and the aggression is his way of showing that...she said Dave and I are doing ALL the right things discipline wise, but that we need to talk to MIL b/c that is why he wont respond to our actions.
I feel so much better knowing an actual THERAPIST is telling me the destructive force in this household is her and it's not just my emotions and I'm not crazy!!!
She gave me great tips on talking to her so that it is a positive situation for her and not like we are ganging up on her.
We'll see how things go this weekend. I just hope that some of these tips she gave help us.
She's calling to follow up next week and from there we will decide if we should actually seek family counceling on a more permanent basis.
*whew* I feel like a whole new person.
Re: Wow...I feel like a huge weight has been lifted!
Oh that's fantastic that you called. So, I guess the next step is to talk to Dave and figure out when you guys, or just Dave, or just you will talk to MIL and tell her what the therapist said.
Is it horrible that I would feel some sense of pleasure over the fact that SHE'S the one screwing up. Not that you should be happy that Anthony is acting out, but that you're doing it all right and she's doing it wrong? Maybe I'm evil, but I think I would like that fact.
that is so great. I'm glad that she was able to help you.
Now you and DH just have to convince MIL that she is the root of all evil
ok, you probably shouldn't say that, but thinking it is ok, right? lol
GL!