We're creating a new board - Need your input

Nest Anni

The editors of The Bump are adding a new board for same-sex parents and couples trying to conceive or adopt.  We'd like your thoughts on what it should be named (feel free to post below if you have other ideas!)

Thanks for your help.

[Poll]

Nest Anni

And I'd like to add that this doesn't mean that you shouldn't discuss trying to conceive/parenting here!  We received this request from some members of The Bump and wanted to get your thoughts.

Two*True

::waves at Knot Anni::  I was just thinking about this this week - great timing!  I've felt sort of weird posting on TTTC but GP doesn't exactly fit since DW and I can do the BD all we want and still won't get a BFP

Nest Anni

Hi TwoTrue!  Yeah, when we received the suggestion we couldn't believe we hadn't created this yet! 

thiswillbe

Knot Anni:

And I'd like to add that this doesn't mean that you shouldn't discuss trying to conceive/parenting here!  We received this request from some members of The Bump and wanted to get your thoughts.

I think the thought behind adding a board to "the bump" is nice, but I am wondering if we have enough people/topics to sustain two boards. The "renaming" of the Same-Sex Weddings board on the knot with the intent of splitting the board in two seems like it was pretty much a disaster. I would hate to see our great little group broken up! That said, for those not TTC/parenting, I can see how the TTC conversation on this board might be annoying.

Would I bounce between two boards? Maybe. But more likely I'd just stick to one (not sure which yet-- maybe this one because the base name of "the bump" doesn't feel very inclusive to those who may never have "bumps").

bluedaisyus

i'd just like to say why i voted the way i did. i love this board. i think it's awesome, and the regulars who post here are awesome.

that said, i also know that there are lots of other awesome people who lurk on this board but don't post because it's a "same-sex" board, and they feel like they're intruding because they're not part of a same-sex household (i don't think they are, i for one like it when they join in, but i can understand the discomfort--believe me, i've felt it elsewhere myself). i think choosing a name that's more inclusive--like glbt parenting, or something along those lines--might help foster a more welcoming environment for other people who might want to participate, while still making it clear that it's a place for us to talk about the things that affect us and the unique process we go through.

if that made sense...

jayangel

I too think its a nice thought to make a board on the bump but I'm also concerned about having enough post to keep both boards active. I actually don't mind the ttc/parenting posts on this board even though I'm not currently ttc.

rikkiandjulie

I am not TTC, and I'm afraid of losing you girlies! i love your updates, and loving chatting with you about TTC. I like reading the TTC posts from you b/c I find it all informative, and good info to know for the future.

I'm afraid that everyone that is TTC will leave this board, to post soley on The Bump board, and that makes me very very very sad.

Mrs._F

My vote goes for LGBT Parenting, as it is more inclusive than "Same-Sex" or "Gay"

Two*True

Well I'd post on both.  I'm already posting on The Bump anyway. 

Plus - I think there are other Nestie/Bumpies in SS households that don't post here.  So the few SS Bumpies posting on the Bump really don't have a 'home' board.  I completely understand wanting a board that you know is 'safe' and the information useful.  I've felt sorta bad posting on TTTC b/c really as far as I know I have no IF problems - just lack of sperm in this relationship.  And GP hasn't really felt comfortable because like I mentioned earlier the BD ain't going to work   But that's just my two cents.

Duchess1

I really dislike the idea of another board.

It seems like we will alienate those   in our group that may not want to, or are unable to, move forward with TTC/parenting.  It seems insensitive to break up our tight knit group, imho.

Two*True

Duchess1:

I really dislike the idea of another board.

It seems like we will alienate those   in our group that may not want to, or are unable to, move forward with TTC/parenting.  It seems insensitive to break up our tight knit group, imho.

But no one says this group has to (or will break up).  What about the SS couples already on the Bump looking for a home board?

KimNSandy

I am not TTC or anything. I have my son and I'm older and done with all the baby stuff. However, there are so many other useful and fun conversations on this board that I don't mind all the baby talk. I have tried to talk on some of the other boards and frankly, they are not nearly as nice and helpful as the ladies here. I hope that even if you make a separate board for the baby stuff, that you all will still drop by here and talk. I finally found a nice SS board and I hate for it to go away by lack of participation....

 

bluedaisyus

Duchess1:

I really dislike the idea of another board.

It seems like we will alienate those   in our group that may not want to, or are unable to, move forward with TTC/parenting.  It seems insensitive to break up our tight knit group, imho.

i don't know. they received the request from posters on the bump. that, to me, implies that there are already people who are not using this board who want a place to chat about baby stuff. this new board isn't just for us. i can certainly understand the fear of being split up and would definitely not want that to happen, but to me they're two completely different things--and perhaps we'll bring a few more folks over here as a result.

as far as the bump goes, i don't really feel like i can participate fully there. i'm the non-bio mom. i feel like an outsider. i can't bond over morning sickness or comiserate about how my growing belly and changing body makes me feel, because those things aren't happening to me. i don't have anyone to bond with over my twinges of jealousy about not being about to feel these things myself, or the frustration about the "oh, so you're not actually HAVING a baby" comments i've gotten, about my fears about bonding with my child the way my wife will. i haven't talked a lot about that here, either, but i don't feel that kind of alienation even though almost all of the other posters on this board who are ttc/parents/waiting are or will be bio-moms. i feel like if i wanted to, i could. and that's what makes this a safe space for me--and will make a new bump board safe for others.

thiswillbe

Two*True:

Plus - I think there are other Nestie/Bumpies in SS households that don't post here.  So the few SS Bumpies posting on the Bump really don't have a 'home' board.

I think this is a good point. It's entirely possible there is a whole other pool of people we don't really "know" yet.

Maybe we're just not as familiar with the need as you are, Anni. I lurk on "the bump" boards quite a lot, and have not seen any other SS posters (other than BostonGayGal, who has made it pretty clear that she doesn't like [and, I am guessing, probably would not regularly post on] SS-geared boards).

That said, I am definitely willing to make an effort to post on both boards. This one may get a little quiet (flipping through the last few pages, it looks like the number of non-ttc-related posts would make for a pretty slow board), but really, who knows...

Maybe we could have a link to the other board at the top of each board to encourage communication on both?

Nest Anni

thiswillbe:

Maybe we could have a link to the other board at the top of each board to encourage communication on both?

We could definitely do this.

Mrs._F

Knot Anni:

thiswillbe:

Maybe we could have a link to the other board at the top of each board to encourage communication on both?

We could definitely do this.

I really like that idea